What was the lowest point of your life, and did you recover from it?

Kicked out of my house at age 19 after flunking out of college and being kicked out of boot camp. Best thing my parents ever did for me.

Later in life I got sober...twice. The second time has lasted for fifteen years after a scary low. Saved my life, my marriage, my ability to parent my children, my job. Made me a better human being.

Congrats on your sobriety! It truly is so rewarding.

I’m currently two months sober. My rock bottom was actually 2014-2015, but I made life style changes between then and my final decision to stop drinking back in November that allowed for incremental life improvements (running, lifting, better friends, career change, etc.) so I can be as well off as I am today. The rock bottom period was horrendous. I was 24 years old, struggling professionally in a high stress job, dealing with family drama, eating fast food most nights, sleeping 4-5 hours a night, and drinking 4-6 IPAs a night. Between the growing alcohol addiction and overreliance on caffeine, I had two panic attacks in August 2014 that set off long latent OCD that I still struggle with to this day. There were multiple times that the thought of killing myself to end the mystery seemed like a good idea. Never actually planned or acted on those sentiments. I was physically unwell from the stress, lack of sleep, diet, and the drinking. I was isolated and alone.

I’m now 28 and finally feel hopeful about the future. It’s crazy now that I’ve cleaned up my act and gotten sober that I spent the last 7 years on a complete emotional and mental health roller coaster. It wasn’t all bad, especially the last 2-3 years, but anxiety was a persistent presence and during my lowest point in Winter 2014-2015, it was all consuming.

As much as I love my life now and I’m enjoying it, I cant stop looking over my shoulder... I’m constantly afraid something might happen and drag me back into the pit of despair.

I am jealous of all of the substance abuse stories. It sounds like getting sober, though difficult, was almost always the key to the repair. I've had periods of years of heavy drinking, but never felt addicted to it and it never caused any negative effects in my life. Frankly I wish I were still drinking like that now.

It's a real b!tch when you're on the bottom and have absolutely no idea how you got there, what happened or how it happened, or what to do or to stop doing to permit you to climb out of the hole.

I was in a finally intolerable employment circumstance a few years ago. Good money, but dangerous and surrounded by people I simply could not endure. Felt my soul slowly crumbling apart within me and was absolutely suicidal for I simply couldn't spot a feasible way out. So took a gamble and threw in with a friend on something I really wanted to do. This was 4 years ago. The thing has sputtered along like a barely lit candle for that long, entirely due to my friend's laziness and total ineptitude and self-absorption / ego. The only reason I haven't starved is because I have apparently a next-level talent for debasing my life to a point where I can "live" on almost literally nothing.

There have been just enough spikes of success along the way to keep the dream alive, for when we get a project it's usually pretty high profile stuff, working with people you see in the movie magazines and on teevee. The work, when it happens, is glamorous, challenging in way which absolutely nourishes me, fun, takes us to exotic locations among exotic people. But these brief triumphs are always like a hit of crack, it feels good in the moment but when the high is gone ten minutes later you find you're still just laying in the gutter with poo in your pants.

I continue to love the work but have no idea how to go about finding other work in the same or similar line. Right now it does not look like I will ever work again. I have enough money to last about another year without having to earn a dime, but my life is so debased and gutted of all enjoyment (in interest of total frugality), it's hardly worth it. From where I stand now, my intolerable, soul-destroying employment of four years ago seems like a complete dream and I would go back to it in an instant if I could.

I knew taking a flyer on a new career was a gamble, and I was very willing to take the risk. But it turns out you never really know what all you're laying on the table. I knew it was a risk, but I had NO IDEA I could lose all that I have lost. I don't mean money. It feels like I laid a tenner on the table, lost the hand, and find that somehow the casino managed to take my house, car, and self respect too. And here I thought I was only wagering the ten bucks.

Anyway this is pretty small potatoes compared against some of these tales. But then I don't think it's meant to be a pissing contest either. Low is low.

Was let go from a job that I enjoyed and was proud of. It was worth bragging about. Within the same month, watched a friend of mine get killed by being hit by a bus turning a corner and they were on a cross walk.

Probably should have seen help at the time. On the surface I thought it was all something I could handle and get through. But looking back, for a few years, I had some weird emotional roller coasters and outbursts that I couldn't explain or predict. Some subliminal stuff going on.

Six years later now I feel like I'm bullet proof. Haven't found anything that will set me off. Level headed so much that it concerns my wife that I don't freak out more.

My twin brother passed away a couple months ago. I'm currently 27. You quickly become very in touch with your own mortality, and at least for me, yearn to get in touch with your spiritual side...at least give it a chance. I have had many dreams of my twin brother since he passed, including 2 straight dreams where I asked him "are you okay?! Will I see you again" and he then answered "Yes I'm fine! I'm enjoying my new life."

This has comforted me beyond measure. Whether it is a dream as invigorating as that, or a dream where him and I are riding a tandem bike together saying nothing to each other, I do believe in the soul and that it will be reunited with loved ones when this life is over. I don't want this to come off as preachy. If anything I'd love this to comfort others...and I just really love talking about my brother and how great of a guy he was. I'm still searching for a returned zest in life, as I'm sure many people here can relate to bouts with depression, but the waves are getting less frequent and not as strong, and getting out of bed is getting a little easier every day. I have a great counselor, a supportive family, and an amazing group of friends who have made this transition doable.

Every night I ask for three things from whoever is listening. Please bring my family and I peace, please help me understand, and please let me dream of my brother. I hope this for everyone who is struggling with something similar.

Drozzyboy wrote:... please let me dream of my brother. I hope this for everyone who is struggling with something similar.

For a year after my son passed I couldn’t conjure a memory of his voice and this shook me beyond measure. I had no recordings. Then my sister tracked down a short video of him goofing around at a family reunion. I’m not sure many people can imagine the joy that video brought me.

Finding this site ranks as one of the lowest points in my life. But it sank to new depths when a someone once used the term ‘contributor’ in relation to my involvement here.

I was living in my car for a few months. My only food source was refilling a large cup from McDonalds. I survived. Now I work at a private equity firm and love every second of my life.

Memories and dreams are wonderful things. Sometimes it's tough to revisit, because you can't go back, but you cannot forgot the joy your loved ones brought to your life. I'm so happy you found that recording of your late son. My mom has a video of my brother and I goofing around on Christmas playing "In The Jungle" on the recorder with our noses, and it ALWAYS brings a smile to our faces.

My lowest point was in Badwater Basin in Death Valley (282 ft below sea level). Man, was I bummed out to be so low. I rebounded. Have reached a height of 6288 ft above sea level, atop Mt Washington, New Hampshire.

Both were reached on foot, in races.

I went to college to become a professional musician. I put all my eggs in that basket and had no fall back plan. It had been that way since my junior year of HS. After trying to make a go of it for about 4 years, I realized that it wasn't going to happen. I was living in Cleveland, OH. It was winter when I decided that I had to move on. I sold all of my equipment and quit all my gigs and teaching jobs. At the same time, my sister got into an epic fight with my step mother and broke off her and her family's relationship with my dad. My mom was also recently remarried and her husband (my step father) lost his job. Then, the girl I was dating told me she wasn't sure about things just as I was going to ask her to skip town with me. And then a cold front blew in sending the temp to -19 F. An all time record.

There were many night where I would just lie on the floor and sulk. Everything was going to pot as my mom would say. But you just keep going. I went to the book store and looked at career books. I decided to go to law school. Things with my girlfriend mended and we did skip town together and got married. Being a lawyer is no joy, but it pays the bills and is steady. I got out of Cleveland and live in a very warm city on the Gulf Coast. I got to do a lot of running once I got out of the frozen Midwest and am certainly in a much better place. My family is still nuts, but I have learned to manage it all by keeping my distance. Moral to the story, just keep moving forward. Eventually, things do get better. It takes a long time, but life is very long with lots of room to make up for the past.

I have had cycles of low points and some were very bad. How I got out of them is how anyone can do the same:

1. You have to stay in the game. You have to carry on. This is # 1. You will make it through. Good things will happen. They must!

2. You have to make a definite decision to change and do you best to make it happen. (and even if you don't the good things will still happen if you stick it out!)

3. You need to work on it on a regular basis. Remember #1: Don't give up. Do it with enthusiasm. Look for news ways to get what you need.

4. DON"T LET ANYONE BRING YOU DOWN! Get away from them. Find new friends. There are lots of people out there that will help you if you need it.

I am now going into one of low point cycles but I will come out of it better than ever. I know this because I did it a number of times in my life using the above formula. You can, too.

I bought a holiday home. Got robbed by the guy helping us to develop it. He then tried to sue us for not paying him even though we did. I had to pay thousands of dollars in legal fees. Then the IRS sent me a letter because I was late to file for several years. They were demanding almost a year's worth of my annual salary. My marriage was a wreck...still kind of is, but we are trying to deal with it. I was pretty close to taking a long walk off a short plank. And then I realized this is just another test of my endurance. I have finished 3 Ironman Triathlons. , and two dozen marathons. I know the routine. Break it down and attack it in segments

Identify interim goals. Three years later, all is good. Totally sorted out my IRS issue. I won the lawsuit against the little maggot crook who tried to screw us. And my two kids are in their teens and kicking butt in school and sports. Never, never, ever stop fighting! Never quit! Be strong. You are the last survivor in a long string of survivors! And the truth will prevail for you. Yes it will. You don't need religion, or any self help b.s. Believe in yourself. You can do great things if you put your mind to it.

Good luck my brothers and sisters!

-0 friends between 7th grade and final year of high school

-Picked up 1 close friend and began to socialize a bit more sr. year of high school

-Fairly solitary life after high school, never have had a significant other, had a few friendships

-Attended community college 3 semesters, 3 different occasions, dropped out each time

-Attended university 1.25 semesters, once, dropped out

-Gambling issue until age 23 or so, lost 10's of thousands (always covered losses, never had friends/family bail me out)

-Maxed out $15,000 credit card at 24, no savings, moved back in with parents

-Payed off credit card within 1 year

-On and off anti depressants age 16-23

-Worked entry level jobs age 27-31, amassed $22k credit card debt, eventually filed for bankruptcy

-Speculated to have Autism Spectrum Disorder at age 31(nearly 32) by 1 psychiatrist

-Put off appointment to be tested for 1 full year, as a result lost out on potential government funding, also

a very stressful year where I earned only a few thousand dollars working part time, hair thinned out a little due to stress

of no income

-Diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at age 33, last year

-Now age 34 and coming out of a bankruptcy, very small amount of savings, hopeful with entrepreneurial endeavour, but no social life/career as I type this

-Physically look and feel healthy, but very isolated

-Had recent scare where I thought I caught (you know what I mean) the worst disease you can get from an encounter

Tests revealed nothing at 12+ weeks so I feel better now, but will have to wait for 6 month test results to be 100%

certain

What keeps me going is that moving forward is my only choice. I am an introvert, never have been suicidal, but have had few meaningful relationships. Just want to be a part of society as anyone does. Never been arrested but have had encounters with police because of road rage, family disputes, etc.

Also recently took myself off medication and now will go back to Dr.'s tomorrow because feeling some effects of withdrawal. Don't want to be on med's as I noticed the ones I was taking had side effects.

If I never sell my screenplay, I'll be living on social assistance for the indefinite future and will have a lot of time on my hands. I may have to teach myself to code, go to a technical school, find a part time job (work has been hell for me), or figure something else out.

Thank you for this post.

For what it's worth-

I rescued a magpie from my fireplace/chimney this past summer.

It had been inside for about 2 days and I didn't think

there was anyway of rescuing it. But, after poking around

one final time with the fireplace levers, I got it to slide down

and into the fireplace. Then, I got a bedsheets and open the fireplace doors.

Surprisingly, it still had a lot of energy. Released it outside and it flew into a tree.

Probably a number of times:

When my father left my mother, my sister, and me. My mother knew about but didn't tell us so when we came back from vacation he was just gone. I think nothing ever had a stronger impact on my life than that, i.e. losing someone you thought you could rely on. We ended up visiting him every three or four weekends, but I to this day have attachment difficulties.

When my mother was fighting with my sister over her anorexia (had been interned in a clinic for a year before), then came into my room, and told me that she was going to kill herself just to drive away afterwards. She came back an hour or so later, but I think that really destroyed any belief in other people completely.

Two weeks into vocational training to become a chef I felt like I'd rather kill myself than continue with that. I had left my mother and my sister at that point and moved away after first staying with my father for a while, studied one thing, left the country for a while, and then came back to become a chef. Terrible idea that gave me a dead end feeling with no perspective for the future.

First semester into my PhD program, I frequently had panic attacks and at some point felt the strong urge to jump out of the window on the sixth floor. I felt so pressured, alone, and uncertain whether it's the right thing that I just felt like ending it.

Life is about recovering. You always get back up again because that's what you do but you still lose something in the process. I wished that I would've known what it feels like to grow up in a secure and happy environment as a child rather than to play video games all day to feel powerful and forget about not having any friend and being subjected to an abusive mother and sister and a spineless father.

In December of 2011, a female coworker falsely accused me of sexual harassment.

It was a situation that was so out of nowhere that my mind could not process it. People talk about unexpected events in life being "like something out of movie." It wasn't like that. Everything was so foreign and strange and unexplainable that my brain could not do anything with the information that it was receiving.

I was eventually completely cleared and the woman was demoted and transferred, but the event crushed me. In fact, the lowest points came after I was exonerated.

I got through the situation and recovered by:

1. Fighting the charge with everything I had. I went on the offense, lawyered up, and put every ounce of my energy into winning. However, once the adrenaline of this wore off, I was extremely down.

2. Leaning on loved ones. My girlfriend at the time, now my wife, was incredibly supportive. My parents and brother were also there for me through the entire ordeal.

3. Relocating. About four years after the event, my wife and I moved. The change of scenery, pace, and lifestyle was what finally allowed me to fully heal.

From time to time, I will read about a situation similar to mine and all the memories come rushing back. However, I mainly feel anger when these events occur, which is emotion I can channel into something constructive, unlike the depression and confusion I felt then.

To all of you who lost a son, brother or close friend, as a parent, I almost cried, especially for the dad that lost his son. My story pales in comparison, but I’ll share two with you in hopes someone finds encouragement from it. At 21, I married my girlfriend since high school. She walked out on me five years later. I was in a heavy travel job at the time and it crushed me. I had invested my life in being with her. Afterward, I realized I had too few friends, no other social life and didn’t really know where to start. That was in the 80s so no online social scene or resources. I REALLY needed some professional help but could not bring myself to go get it. I think I was too proud. In many ways, I wanted life to end; it was just too painful to deal with it. The pain of rejection was so bad. I had lots of family support, but they didn’t really know how to help. I couldn’t take my own life and hurt those who still cared about me and I also didn’t want to give up. Thankfully, I got back at it, started meeting people and met a nice girl and we have been married for almost 30 years now and have to kids in 20s. To those who experience this loss, there is always a future; develop a friendship network if you can. You may be someone’s dream spouse or find yours so don’t quit looking.

Another example; left corporate America and purchased a business with some family and a friend in 2009. Put all the money I had at time in it. The business was running out of cash less than two years later in the downturn and banks wouldn’t even talk to us. I had nightmares of having to move out of our house in night so neighbors wouldn’t see me, my kids having to drop out of college and possibly my wife leaving me as a result. Well, we recruited a wealthy distant relative to invest in the business and inject cash as part of the deal. Two years later, the business started hitting large profits and generating cash. Never missed a payment, never had to move, just had to work like hell seven days a week for a few years; income now in mid six figures and I am one grateful person. I guess the point of this long post is that there is always hope, a second chance. Don’t cheat yourself out of that next chance. Life can be great again.