Anyone marry someone who is far less "successful" than you? Why?

You'd be a fool, an absolute FOOL, to go after the woman with a little more beauty and less brains. When life gets REAL and you need to make tough decisions are you going to rely on a Barbie Doll to support you on the day-to-day grind or engage in a rational conversation? Can you be with a person who just isn't able to understand you?

I speak from experience. I dated some crazy hot women with nothing upstairs, smart women with average looks, bratty entitled princess types, girls with zero personality and all book smarts, and quiet submissive types who you make you feel like you are doing everything to keep the relationship functional.

I never understood why rich, smart men end up with such hot bimbos for wives. They are better off hiring escorts that only take up a fraction of their busy schedules and who they can invariably kick out of the lives without having to deal with dynamics of a real (lopsided) relationship.

You said she's not "dumb", but just not on your level. A marriage (a good one), technically is an equal partnership. You need your other half to contribute her share.

Most of the time, looks go after marriage anyways. People get complacent, stop working out and stop trying to impress one another. Nobody cares what you look like past age 50 anyways.

7.5/10

Slight penality for the sociology degree and "true equal".

Karl Hungus wrote:

What if they're driven in other ways? What if your goal is to become a MD and theirs is to be the best Starbucks barista in the world? What if they constantly refine their craft and keep making amazing coffee and get recognized for it (not just by customers, but by Starbucks corporate?).

Your larger point stands, Karl, but there is no such thing as amazing coffee at Starbucks.

The Barnacle wrote:

Your larger point stands, Karl, but there is no such thing as amazing coffee at Starbucks.

The Latte Maccihato is on point, as you kids say.

Power Player wrote:

whereas she has a bachelor's degree in sociology.

You've answered your own question.

Power Player wrote:

she does not live life at my speed

You mean, she doesn't spend her life speed-posting on dubious message boards?

Expert on Genetics wrote:

Lovers wrote:

Marriage is not about "success" or finding someone that challenges you. That is what coworkers and friends are for. Marriage is about finding someone who you love and loves you. Marriage is that simple.

Marriage is about finding someone who will produce successful children, though. Sorry to burst your bubble.

This might seem foreign to you, but it’s actually perfectly natural and common. For example, if you were 5’6”, would you really want to marry a girl under 5’00 instead of a 5’2”-5’5” girl with equal qualifications? No. You wouldn’t. That’s because you’re wired to seek out a girl who will help your seed progress to the mean.

Marriage is not genetics nor wiredness nor procreation. You are mixing up several ideas incorrectly. Height is not important to me. I have preferred several 5'0 girls instead of 5'2 girls with "equal qualifications". Stop putting your preferences on me and others. Don't be a self-centered bigot. Some people like short girls. Some people like tall girls. Some people like normal girls.

The Entire wrote:

I don't consider hedge fund managers and certain other Wall Street types to be any kind of success, no matter how many millions they make.

That's ridiculous and just indicates that you are illiterate. Being successful means that you succeed at your goals. If the Wall Street types are succceeding at their goals, then they are indeed successful regardless of your illiteracy.

It has nothing to do with my alleged "illiteracy," you fool. Literacy has nothing to do with it. We choose to admire what we choose to admire. Your need to attack me and not mind your own business suggests an enormous insecurity and inferiority complex on your part.

Most of the men in my suburban neighborhood married unintelligent women and now they are stay at home moms. Their ROI to the household is very little, however they claim they are doing the work of 10-12 jobs. I think the men are just really insecure.

Lovers wrote:

The Entire wrote:

I don't consider hedge fund managers and certain other Wall Street types to be any kind of success, no matter how many millions they make.

That's ridiculous and just indicates that you are illiterate. Being successful means that you succeed at your goals. If the Wall Street types are succceeding at their goals, then they are indeed successful regardless of your illiteracy.

It doesn't seem as absurd as you indicate. Working on 'Wall Street' (hedge funds, private equity, banking, etc.) is far from an intellectual endeavor, despite the potential for financial success.

Come on now wrote:

Expert on Genetics wrote:

Marriage is about finding someone who will produce successful children, though. Sorry to burst your bubble.

This might seem foreign to you, but it’s actually perfectly natural and common. For example, if you were 5’6”, would you really want to marry a girl under 5’00 instead of a 5’2”-5’5” girl with equal qualifications? No. You wouldn’t. That’s because you’re wired to seek out a girl who will help your seed progress to the mean.

This is idiotic. I am 5'11", my wife is 5'0". I can honestly say I've never thought about it at the level of detail that you just did. Our kids are amazing.

he was talking about if the guy was 5'6". since you are taller your kids wont be too far below the mean

She had.......a very tight pusy

If you're asked the question "who if your best friend" and the answer isn't "my wife" then you've married badly and, most probably, for the wrong reasons.

I have been married for 21 years for context. I have seen it all with my own marriage and my friends'. IMO you haven't found the right person yet. Keep looking.

The number one most important thing is to find someone that challenges you and that you have a relationship that is on an even level (nobody dominates the other). You need to keep each other honest in life and advise each other through tough times. She needs to be on your level, and you on hers.

It sounds like neither of these women can offer that, plus have the level of caring, generosity and warmth that you prefer.

There are a lot of women out there and it is never too late to keep searching.

You need to find more than two women. If neither obviously compels you to one over the other, then that's probably a sure sing that you should look for somebody different altogether.

Nothing bores me more than a book where the protagonist grows up to meet a whopping two eligible people in town and struggles to make the decision over which one of the two people to pick.

You may struggle to believe this, especially if you are hard up for attention now, but among the millions of possible people out there for you there are probably hundreds who have all the best qualities of both of these two women you're contrasting.

men do this wrote:

this happens all the time.

for tiger woods married his nanny.

cam newton married a stripper.

Warren Buffet married a waitress (second marriage I believe).

Expert on Genetics wrote:

Lovers wrote:

Marriage is not about "success" or finding someone that challenges you. That is what coworkers and friends are for. Marriage is about finding someone who you love and loves you. Marriage is that simple.

Marriage is about finding someone who will produce successful children, though. Sorry to burst your bubble.

This might seem foreign to you, but it’s actually perfectly natural and common. For example, if you were 5’6”, would you really want to marry a girl under 5’00 instead of a 5’2”-5’5” girl with equal qualifications? No. You wouldn’t. That’s because you’re wired to seek out a girl who will help your seed progress to the mean.

Yeah, I know you're a troll, but that's just downright rubbish. Height is overrated.

Well, uhmmmm. I think you might have it backwards. She's marrying down to you. Not the other way around.