I've slowly become really successful. All my old friends and family hate me.

I just wanted to throw my 2 cents in. I agree with the other posters who told you not to be too generous (i.e. frivolous) with your money. That's NOT the way to make friends. Sure, you don't want to be a tight-wad and all that, but don't go overboard with generosity because it makes you look desperate and gains you no respect. As soon as the money's gone, the friends are gone.

As far as being successful and folks not liking you for it, that is possible, especially with friends and family who may have looked down on your lifestyle of free living while they humped away at a 9 to 5. Now that you're doing better than them AND living the lifestyle you want, it's really sticking in their craw. It could be that.

On the other hand, if you are an arrogant bass turd who constantly rubs it in their face that you did it "your way" and your still kicking their a$$ financially, well, that's not going to earn you any brownie points, either. Do a little introspection and make sure that you're not being the a$$ you never wanted to be. Better yet, you could just ask your friends & family why their attitude has changed toward you. Just lay it out there and see what they say.

Lastly, if you're not ready to put in some work to patch up old relationships, it might be time to make some new ones.

I should add, if you think that being a minor celebrity with good means is tough, try being quite well-known while still being poor. It's a bear and a half. You'll have guys who are 100 times your net worth stabbing you in the back just for the ego trip.

Still smile through every day though.

"For a long time I busted my arse and lived very meagerly" .....

You're 29 for goodness sake! You haven't busted it that long.

Wow, totally understand.

This happened to me last fall. After ten years or more of working, networking, I "walked" into a huge new opportunity.

Got the cold shoulder from one friend when I shared my compensation structure with him. (Jealous.)

Another friend "bro-broke up" with me, lol. (Jealous, stupid, wanted to stay in his station in life, self-pity, resistance to change etc., so he self-sabotaged himself before I could even help him. I'm a generous guy.)

It was a fascinating, and somewhat sad, observation in social psychology/psych.

I couldn't feel too sad for too long because I was having so much fun and was so happy.

Cue... "Let the good times roll!"

PS, CONGRATS!

....You also reminded me of a woman I briefly dated...who told me her parents back east would shame and guilt her "You with your fancy high paying Silicon Valley Career..." The worst thing was, she was only a smidge less negative than they were. It was 2 dates - she asked me out both times - and run. Literally, after the second date she was such a negative Nancy the whole time, I dropped her back at her place, gave her a handshake (She litereally had tears welled in her eyes...I think she knew she'd blown it, but couldn't stop her ingrained behavior, and self-sabotaged) and then I ran to my car.

If only that were it...I "have" to see her once a month at an industry confab. I'll give her this, she has a smoking hot body...but unhappiness is written all over her face and the word has gotten around and she is perennially, eternally single. There's a lot of really unhappy successful people. --Don't worry, move on, be happy, move forward, celebrate life, and, y'know, help others who are able to be helped

As a wise person once said: "Manage the energy around you by choosing those you allow in your life wisely."

Let me take a wild guess. You got to medical pot farm before others jumped in.

Only morons "share their compensation structure" with others.

isi wrote:

I have lived a pretty unconventional life, by choice, because I don't really have the typical needs and wants of most people. That alone has caused me loss of friends and a lot of criticism from my family.

Full Stop.

You're different. Don't blame your diminishing friendships on jealousy or any other specific idea. You are different in many ways and that will be a source of issues between you and others. Nothing wrong with that; many of the greatest thinkers, artists, scientists and leaders have been different. But don't hunt for reasons when it's staring you in the face.

isi wrote:

I have lived a pretty unconventional life, by choice, because I don't really have the typical needs and wants of most people. That alone has caused me loss of friends

That's ok, jamin will come around eventually

isi wrote:What exactly I do is not important..

Let me tell you some more about me, now that we're talking about me. I need to continue the illusion of social power by denying you answers to simple questions.

Did I pique your interest in me? Because I'm really successful and surrounded by haters. But, I can't tell you why.

WTF? WTF? wrote:

successful and generous guy wrote:

If you do well you have to share your success with your family and friends. Yes, that means being generous to them, both financially and give a lot of yourself.

You will have to learn that to become really successful.

Wow, that is HORRIBLE advice!

Being generous with your time and attention is a good thing for anyone. But being generous financially with friends and family is just about the most idiotic idea I can think of.

You and the rest of the tightwads here will never be successful, and definitely not happy.

Being generous financially doesn't mean you give them money out of the blue. To take just one example. A very successful friend of mine bought a big second home in Aspen, CO. Both summer and winter a bunch of his old and new friends come to visit him. He's bringing us all together. And we all enjoy his success.

You are SUFFERRING FROM SUCCESS. The lames and miserables are gonna hate. Surround yourself with successful, good and happy people.

isi wrote:

Most of my friends and family have very typical lives of working 9-5, never really going anywhere or doing anything interesting, always kind of just scraping by financially (due to their poor spending habits), etc, .

There is a natural distancing between people when there is a huge financial disparity between. They can develop different interests, do different things and tend to be in different circles.

But here is the part that you need to pay attention too.

(1) Nobody wants to hear about the vacation or the new car or how amazingly successful the rich guy is. That's human nature. It not a character flaw of theirs its just them being normal people.

(2) Be carefully of communicating the disdain that you have for their life style and choices. Yes you do feel disdain toward them and yes they do sense that. If you honestly feel that they are, "never really going anywhere or doing anything interesting....... poor spending habits" as you say then you do have disdain for their life style. They probably sense it.

OK?