Dating someone who doesn't exercise

If you don't want to date her, don't date her. The reason doesn't matter and it doesn't matter at all if people agree or disagree with your reason.

Don't date her in the hopes you can get her to start exercising.

If you don't want to date her, don't date her. The reason doesn't matter and it doesn't matter at all if people agree or disagree with your reason.

Don't date her in the hopes you can get her to start exercising.

renewed marathoner wrote:

Exercising and activity are two very different things.

Physiologically-speaking exercising and being active are the same thing. 150 minutes of light aerobic exercise or 75 minutes of vigorous aerobic exercise are what doctors recommend.

If a mailman or landscaper doesn't exercise outside of their trade they are still meeting their needed exercise because their job is active. Someone who sits behind a desk all day but walks their dog for 20 minutes a day is technically active too.

Charlie Freak wrote:

People who were not athletes as kids or young adults will sometimes catch the 'get in shape' bug and start running or some such, but chances are slim that your non-exercising SO will ever be as committed to fitness as you are.

This is basically what my best friend told me. If someone hasn't exercised by age 24 chances are they never will be into working out.

I think you get my point. Just so I understand you. She isn't active at all?

I can understand people who don't like to work out but play soccer with friends, bike commute to work, etc. That's what I was trying to distinguish..

renewed marathoner wrote:

I think you get my point. Just so I understand you. She isn't active at all?

I can understand people who don't like to work out but play soccer with friends, bike commute to work, etc. That's what I was trying to distinguish..

Last time she exercised her friend took her to the park to walk and she "hated" it. She also "hates" running. No yoga either.

I was astounded because she's going to be a doctor. Then I had to remind myself that doctors have a higher occurrence of being over-weight and obese than the general population. Even crazier is that if you looked at her you would never know this girl has never exercised in her entire life. Plus she's super type A which really goes against her anti-exercise mentality.

I hope you are also studying to be a doctor. Specifically as a proctologist so that you can get that stick out of your a*s.

Dating a Non-athlete wrote:

She has a nice body and I was stunned to learn when I asked her if she exercises she said "never".

.

This is exactly what you want in a woman.

A nice body without working out.

I would be more concerned with dating an athlete.

At some point, life gets busy and you work out less or not at all.

Those that used to work out all of the time need to keep it up or they get fatter quicker.

If her body is naturally good looking, she won't lose as much shape over time.

Dating a Non-athlete wrote:

This is basically what my best friend told me. If someone hasn't exercised by age 24 chances are they never will be into working out.

Why is it so important that she exercise so much? If she is clearly currently in good health and weight, why do you think she must begin to exercise? That part of your logic doesn't make any sense. She made it through college without exercising and without gaining weight so she is doing something right. Diet can produce all of the important health benefits that exercise can. She doesn't need to be ready to run a 5k PR every week of her life.

That goes double for you. If you aren't running competitively, there's no reason to exercise an hour per day.

For her sake, you really should move on. This girl is in medical school (suggesting that somewhere along the line, she did take a break from "socializing" to study) and is not overweight, suggesting she probably has a fairly healthy diet. There is nothing wrong with her; she just has different priorities and interests than you. Your post reeks of condescension and she doesn't need you to make her feel less than worthy.

That said, it's okay that you prioritize fitness and that you require a similar priority from a potential partner. You come off as a dick, but I'm sure there is some hot, fit girl out there who's perfect for you.

Dating a Non-athlete wrote:This is basically what my best friend told me. If someone hasn't exercised by age 24 chances are they never will be into working out.

I didn't exercise at all until I turned 30. Ran for the first time and was drawn in by the challenge, and likely also the way it fits in with the type-A personality.

I think your friend doesn't go to local races to see the hordes of 40+ runners who were sedentary in their 20s, or the gyms that are filled with middle-aged people trying to get in shape for the first time in their lives.

easy weeks wrote:

[quote]Dating a Non-athlete wrote:This is basically what my best friend told me. If someone hasn't exercised by age 24 chances are they never will be into working out.

I didn't exercise at all until I turned 30. Ran for the first time and was drawn in by the challenge, and likely also the way it fits in with the type-A personality.

I think your friend doesn't go to local races to see the hordes of 40+ runners who were sedentary in their 20s, or the gyms that are filled with middle-aged people trying to get in shape for the first time in their lives.

Yes, but these are but a fraction of the millions of 40+ people who were sedentary in their 20s and remained that way. It's still unlikely that someone who did not exercise early in life will pick it up with any enthusiasm or consistency when they're 45.

Going to a gym or local road race is going to give you sampling bias. Also a lot of the people in their late 30s or early 40s that are working out a lot are divorced and are trying to maximize their potential for a new mate. From what I've observed as soon as they are re-married they go back to their old ways.

And for those who think I'm being condescending that's not my intention. This is about having similar lifestyles and goals with someone who is otherwise super cool. What happens if I go out on a run and she takes offense because that's time away from her (like one of my ex-girlfriends)? What happens if she starts putting on weight and gets depressed about it and when I suggest trying to exercise she gets angry?

My point is I feel like my SO should have some means of physical exercise to identify with me. She doesn't have to be a runner, but she needs to be able to identify with my athletic behavior. Just as if you had never heard classical music until your mid-20s, you'd probably not have an appreciation for it as say someone who grew up listening to it and playing the piano.

Just wait until you have kids and see how much time you have to exercise.

Don't be so critical, go out on a few more dates and see how she does with Kegels.

Of course if you have doubts now you probably are not all that interested. But at least you were not so self absorbed that you failed to see the opinion of others.

Even if 80% of the responses you get are from 15 year old celibates.

None of that has anything to do with your SO identifying with your running. Your ex didnt want you to run so much because that's time away from her. That has nothing to with whether or not your ex identified with your running. She was likely just a high maintenance SO and anything that reduced your time together would be a problem. How do you not understand this??

The rest of your post is just dumb and leads me to believe you are trolling. Some people don't want to run to lose weight. Running isn't even a good way to lose weight. Diet is best and easiest.

gggram wrote:

None of that has anything to do with your SO identifying with your running. Your ex didnt want you to run so much because that's time away from her. That has nothing to with whether or not your ex identified with your running. She was likely just a high maintenance SO and anything that reduced your time together would be a problem. How do you not understand this??

The rest of your post is just dumb and leads me to believe you are trolling. Some people don't want to run to lose weight. Running isn't even a good way to lose weight. Diet is best and easiest.

Sorry gggram but I'm going to disagree with you. The best way to lose weight is through both diet and exercise. The human body has a homeostatic set point for weight. That's why 90% of people that go on diets end up regaining the weight. The people that end keep it off are those who diligently exercise and diet.

Dating a Non-athlete wrote:

I got drinks with this cute 24 year old woman over the weekend. We are both medical students and our personalities mesh well. She has a nice body and I was stunned to learn when I asked her if she exercises she said "never".

...

Does anyone have experience in trying to encourage their non-athletic partner to exercise? I was thinking about trying to see if she'd be willing go on a walk with me and my dog. I would be inclined to try to teach her the basics of exercise, but it seems pointless if she's miserable the entire time.

Doesn't matter. How good is the sex and how frequent is it? All other facts are mostly irrelevant. After your married the real concern is how often she smokes your chief, not if she goes running with you. You can go running with a buddy.

Does she wear thongs?