His
fur shore wrote:
WiT is wineturtle he seems to speak 'girl' better than most of the regulars. His relationship stuff is pretty much always on point.
His
fur shore wrote:
WiT is wineturtle he seems to speak 'girl' better than most of the regulars. His relationship stuff is pretty much always on point.
Dude, my advice is to totally not trust what she says. I'd hack into her phone, or hire someone to spy on her, at least until the wedding. Better safe than sorry.
The One Who Knows wrote:
Wow! Where to start?
Let's see:
"You probably are female in challenging this statement."
Wrong. Perhaps I am an intelligent human being who is somewhat suspicious of grand generalizations of genders.
"Here is how I KNOW that factor to be true. WOMEN HAVE TOLD ME.
Example One: Female #1 "One of my problems is that I don't always know what I want. Sometimes I say 'yes,' and don't know until later that I really wanted to say 'no." Equals "I don't know what I am doing in the moment."
Example Two: Females #2 and #3 "When I think of the crazy stuff I put men through when I was younger, no wonder men think women are crazy, I was, I was reacting and acting without thinking and not realizing what I was doing until way after the fact. I didn't know why I was doing things. I didn't think things through. I was reacting on hormones, emotion, etc."
So, a few females talk to you and you conclude "Ah, women are like this..."
Wow, just wow.
"Men find it hard to understand that women often act on emotion and reaction, with out stopping to consider or THINK THEIR ACTIONS ALL THE WAY THROUGH."
And men do? Now that is funny. Yes, all those men out there carefully considering the consequences and ethics of their actions...not in the least influenced by emotions, short term thinking, sex drive...
"As to men always knowing why they are doing something. In THIS scenario the dude is flirting and making a move on a woman. You think he magically doesn't know that he is trying to get into her panties?
Puhleeze. "
This is not something that I have said. It is something that you have said. Perhaps you have a hard time telling the difference?
"that is kind of an insult tho those who are truly mentally challenged, or have Asperger's syndrome and the like"
That is true. At least you got this one right. I am truly sorry for slandering those less fortunate. People who are retarded cannot help that fact. I am hoping, however, that you have the capacity to learn.
Dude, (can I call you "Dude," or are you a chick...) I'll guarantee you that I have a better reputation with women than you do, that I've had more success with women than you have.
Now, to your response, I cited in brief how I know those two things, citing but a few data points. Are you so stupid that you cannot imagine that no one is ever ever ever going to cite their entire life history on a chat board for you.
Generalizations exist for a reason, BECAUSE THEY ARE GENERALLY TRUE, and make it easier to communicate certain ideas quickly.
I have NEVER had a female friend disagree with me on those points. Of course in real life I share those ideas with women not by stating them flat out, but ask them questions that result in them acknowledging that those things are true.
Most women will tell you that they regret kissing, dating, sleeping with some guy in their past and that they do not know what they were thinking/doing when they did it.
You just don't have enough experience with women.
I KNOW it is not politically correct to say it flat out, and yet in my experience with 100's and 100's of women as friends and lovers...it is something I learned.
You've got some learning in front of you. Some hard learning.
And what I summed up, was an interpretation of what you said... If you are so uneducated or blind that you cannot make that leap -- and get your panties in a knot about it...
Then you are clearly a defensive chick.
Timmy Jenkins wrote:
Get Real Real wrote:All of my email passwords were auto saved on my fiancee's computer, she has it set up that way.
I told her she could read any of my emails any time, and have the passwords to my bank accounts.
You're either together, open, and having nothing to hide, or you don't.
On a shared computer...leaving your email logged in. She either wanted to get caught, or she wanted him to read them and be jealous.
There are personal emails that can be of no business to the other partner. A common example is your wife having a best friend whose husband is cheating on her or is abusive to her. She is the confidant to her best friend; you as an outsider have less useful input into the situation.
The reason for stored passwords is for convenience, not so the other partner can snoop. Most people trust their partner to not read their mail. Why would you read their mail if you actually trusted them?
I agree. However you either trust a woman or you don't. I told my fiancee the first week I knew her that she was the first woman I had met educated and intelligent enough that she could read my email any time she wanted -- I trusted her completely. Of course I had just told her that I have tons and tons of female friends, some that were former lovers, some that had been girlfriends, etc. I also told her I don't cheat, and I never leave a relationship for things like sexual variety, ego strokes, or any of the other immature and vapid reasons people cheat and hurt one another. The only reason I leave a relationship, is if it is not working, and is not fixable.
It just turned out she had her computer at home set up to automatically save passwords...and no wifi at the time, so I'd check my email when at her house, on her computer.
I was never up to no good, and would tell her "hey open my email and read the email from _______ or ______" one of our friends etc.
The best way to live, is to live an open life.
The best lie, is the truth. --Meaning no lies, nothing hidden.
Lisa - Barnard College wrote:
I agree with WiT. If anyone should be ditching the wedding it should be her. They have dated for seven years and he is still massively insecure that she would cheat on him, he leaves threatening messages to a high school friend that she has seen three times in seven years, he goes through her email and instead of talking reasonably to her, he physically threatens someone else, labels someone a creep after meeting him once, he finds this one outing horrific enough that he has to start a thread on letsrun.
I could imagine after they are married, she will not be allowed to get together with the girls, he will randomly show up unannounced at her work, look through her cell phone records, pressure her to quit her job, and eventually not want to let her leave the house alone.
You have no idea what you are talking about, read "The Gift of Fear," and "Blink," for an education. That said, at best human intuition is only on target 80% of the time.
As to getting together with the girls...
Getting together with the girls for breakfast, brunch, or lunch - appropriate.
Going to Vegas for a weekend with the girls -- not appropriate.
Going to the local pick up joint for a night of dancing with the girls - not appropriate.
Going to a nice restaurant (without a club, dance floor or known meet market) for dinner with the girls -- appropriate.
And lastly, you'll probably be divorced in your life.
These "girls" should think of themselves as married, adult, WOMEN and Ladies...once they are married.
You want to go dancing at a meet market? Go as couples, with your men. If you don't want to take your man, you got marriage or relationship troubles.
"Dude, (can I call you "Dude," or are you a chick...) I'll guarantee you that I have a better reputation with women than you do, that I've had more success with women than you have.
Now, to your response, I cited in brief how I know those two things, citing but a few data points. Are you so stupid that you cannot imagine that no one is ever ever ever going to cite their entire life history on a chat board for you.
Generalizations exist for a reason, BECAUSE THEY ARE GENERALLY TRUE, and make it easier to communicate certain ideas quickly.
I have NEVER had a female friend disagree with me on those points. Of course in real life I share those ideas with women not by stating them flat out, but ask them questions that result in them acknowledging that those things are true.
Most women will tell you that they regret kissing, dating, sleeping with some guy in their past and that they do not know what they were thinking/doing when they did it.
You just don't have enough experience with women.
I KNOW it is not politically correct to say it flat out, and yet in my experience with 100's and 100's of women as friends and lovers...it is something I learned.
You've got some learning in front of you. Some hard learning.
And what I summed up, was an interpretation of what you said... If you are so uneducated or blind that you cannot make that leap -- and get your panties in a knot about it...
Then you are clearly a defensive chick."
OK, That's funny.
Well maybe not.
What it indicates quite clearly is:
- The ability and willingness to state as true items which, not only do you not know, but you clearly have zero information about.
- An intelligence level well below average.
"Most women will tell you that they regret kissing, dating, sleeping with some guy in their past and that they do not know what they were thinking/doing when they did it." - And it never occurred to you that there may be other reasons for their saying this than its veracity? Wow, brother. Just wow. Aren't you the one who claims to understand women? This is absolutely hilarious.
- A maturity level on par with your average pubescent male.
" I'll guarantee you that I have a better reputation with women than you do, that I've had more success with women than you have." - Oh, yes. I am impressed. What a manly man you must be. Did you get out of high school yet, brother?
I'm sorry but really you should go back to Dyestat or whatever other high school site you came from.
Bump.... Hey OP do you have any follow up, hows the married life (I hope) going for you?
PO, did you marry this woman? How's it going?
One who asks wrote:
PO, did you marry this woman? How's it going?
I banged her and then moved on to her lil sister. True story. We rent the floor above her so she can hear us doing it and then talk loudly about how bad older sis is in bed. Seems to get lil sis more into it.
You said you live with your fiancé (presumably you've been having sex with her despite not being married). It might not be easy to start limiting sex to marriage when you've been training yourselves to have non-marital sex all that time.
Long story. Previous post is not me.
We eventually went to counseling and came around. Things were good post marriage for several years. Still, you always have that question in the back of your mind.
Back in 2015 I got really into Bernie's campaign and was working tireless phone banking and canvassing. It happened to be the same time I got laid off. This really put some tension on our marriage as I was really devoting a lot of time to the campaign and our finances were really suffering. We had to downsize apartments and she got really upset when I refused to stop giving my weekly donation to Bernie.
I was really scared about losing her but I couldn't bring myself to give up on the man I believed in. Anyway, around this time, guess who hits up my wife for dinner again? He was back in town on business and apparently doing pretty well. At this point I knew I had to concede something so I told her she could go to dinner. She ended up getting back from dinner past midnight and I knew things weren't right. Within a week she had told me everything, about how I didn't have time for her anymore, about how this guy gave her what she needed. I gave in. I had to fight my fight for the election and let her have hers. She's seeing him regularly still and, well, post election I'm still trying to find my way.
mad and in need of advice wrote:
Long story. Previous post is not me.
We eventually went to counseling and came around. Things were good post marriage for several years. Still, you always have that question in the back of your mind.
Back in 2015 I got really into Bernie's campaign and was working tireless phone banking and canvassing. It happened to be the same time I got laid off. This really put some tension on our marriage as I was really devoting a lot of time to the campaign and our finances were really suffering. We had to downsize apartments and she got really upset when I refused to stop giving my weekly donation to Bernie.
I was really scared about losing her but I couldn't bring myself to give up on the man I believed in. Anyway, around this time, guess who hits up my wife for dinner again? He was back in town on business and apparently doing pretty well. At this point I knew I had to concede something so I told her she could go to dinner. She ended up getting back from dinner past midnight and I knew things weren't right. Within a week she had told me everything, about how I didn't have time for her anymore, about how this guy gave her what she needed. I gave in. I had to fight my fight for the election and let her have hers. She's seeing him regularly still and, well, post election I'm still trying to find my way.
Post of the week!
Way to nut up dude!
Lol, about Bernie.
If true, great take.
I knew a couple who cheated on each other. He confessed to her first. She then confessed to him. They started laughing. Forgave each other. They had married at 18. After one date.
--They are still married today. (And ironically, they are a Hollywood couple.)
You just never know.
mad and in need of advice wrote:
...and, well, post election I'm still trying to find my way.
You and all the Bernie and Hillary supporters, my friend...
Flagpole wrote: Here's my advice brother...better sit down:
OooooOOOOooo!!! Here cVms Fl@gpole..
Flagpole wrote: Married women cheat almost as much as married men....
Eh?!! What would you know about this topic? I'm one of the world's foremost experts on this topic and you all at LR get the benefit of my trurthful, counter-repressive knowledge for free!
No. Women cheat *more*. You just don't see it or know it because - on the whole - women are much, much smarter about their cheating. #1. Remember the basic assumption that will help you interpret reality instead of colliding with it.... Women are smart, in general, they are smarter than you. #2. Secrecy, lack of public visibility and knowledge helps them maintain their sexual powerbase vs doofus, repressive males - "Oh you dirty p1g! You want to b0ne her!!" etc. CONTROL!! They want to control YOU but won't control themselves, unless they are evolved females and accept we all want more open fun without drama. Those are valuable girls! My girls! Not the OP's wife though, which precipitates a crisis. But, remember, #1. Not an accident she allowed you to see her texts/phone/notes. She wants her tryst to be discovered by the OP.
Here's a reponse to today's ad... "My pinay wife...Id love to have her seeded by you..." [She's hot! Yes, I'm the man for such a tough and demanding job! Also I'm the only one here with the balls to propose and realize such a plan.]
Flagpole wrote: Now, what to do with this knowledge? One of two things:
1) If I were you, I'd end it today and consider yourself lucky that you did it before you got married. Sorry, but I don't need that kind of drama in my life.
2) You can decide that the two of you will have an "open marriage" and that you can each boink whomever you want.
Bottom line though brother is that your fiance is a bad person...she will cheat on you if you marry her, and then there will either be a nasty divorce, or she and the guy she's cheating on you with will plan your death. Seriously. Don't mess around here. Drop her like a bad habit.
Tsk! She's not a BAD PERSON! Wow this eternal LR master narrative of pseudo-christian virtue-ginity is totally repressive! She's a human female with normal desires who wants to b@ngg...really what is so hard for all of you to grasp about this? Now she may be making bad choices about who/when to do it with, but she's quite normal in terms of behavior.
To your suggestions. Plan 2. Always works better. As long as she doesn't get impregnated by a doofus! But then you should train her to a. be careful b. develop better taste in men, and c. preferably, in women too. But for you this will be a long process. She will only be properly trained when she squeezes your b@lls dry as you cVm into your new young slut in your shared bed and she whispers kinky encouragement to your new toy...if you can't imagine this or make it happen, then truly you are low-level losers forever.
And yes, I've done this a number of times and I'm going to do it again soon with new TG. Yummm!!
mad and in need of advice wrote:
I live with my fiance of seven years and we�re getting married at the end of August. Last week she told me that a guy she went to high school with a while ago (we�re both 33) sent her an email out of the blue and wanted to �catch up�. Their moms know each other from the town where they grew up and he stills sees her mom sometimes I think.
The guy is married, 33, no kids. He�s a teacher who lives in the suburbs, about 45 minutes by train from where we are. I met him only once, 5 years ago, at their high school reunion. That�s the only time I met him and I disliked him immediately. At the reunion he was with his then fiance but was flirting with my girlfriend. I asked her what was going on, and she said that they kissed once in high school, but nothing more, and that they were friends.
After that my fiance saw him once again about one year ago with her mom and family. She never calls him, emails him or talks about him. He's not even invited to our wedding.
Well last night my fiance met him after work around 7pm. That creep took the train to meet her and after a few drinks he proposed to go to a restaurant for dinner in a nice place in a beautiful part of town. Finally at 11pm I called my fiance to ask her where she was and if I could meet with her. She refused to tell me where they were (I only learned today where they were). She said they were paying the bill and she was about to come home. She hung up.
So at home I opened her email account on our shared computer (she never logs off), read the email from this creep ("I miss you!") and got his cell phone number. I called him and pretty much told him to go f@@k himself. He called my fiance right away to tell her. When she came home, she was mad at me as hell, and we are still mad at each other today.
I think the one who did something wrong is that creep. I want to get back at him, but I don�t know how. Any ideas?
All you need to do is flip the genders.
If a guy did it we know it all the women will say.
If you want a dedicated partner she is not your girl. I've seen it enough times. If she really cared she would not even take the chance of hurting you in that way. Meeting that guy was more important than taking the chance of hurting you.
Maybe she's looking for a better offer. You can tell she's not looking at the person but she's shopping for benefits.
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