What if you don't drink?

I used to be just like you couple years ago. I really wanted to go out and hang out with all my buddies, but they would be out partying.

And the people that weren't drinkers were hardcore christian people, and I had a hard time hanging out with them because I just felt I didnt fit in.

So...

I spent many weekends just hanging out by myself. Like a hermit. Sorry man but I know what you feel!

Strange.. I just bumped a post asking for alcohol recommendations. Honestly, I used to be like you. I was a little scared of alcohol because I wasn't sure what I would do when I was drunk, and I have an easily addictive personality so I think I was worried for myself in that respect too (my grandfather was also an alcoholic and a womanizer). Like the above poster, I reduced myself to the life of a hermit, until I got so tired of being alone I figured I had to do something about it as I was an extremely social person in high school.

Call me a nerd but I took a very scientific approach to drinking and limit finding before I started partying with anyone else (yes I'm aware that drinking by yourself is probably the first sign of alcoholism but this was for experimentation purposes only and I've never done it again).

Also there's a difference between drinking casually and abusing - I can understand not wanting to be around loud obnoxious drunks, they suck. But are you sure all these people are going to insane loud and crazy parties where everyone gets wasted?

Having a little bit of alcohol in your system (as long as you trust yourself) can make certain circumstances more pleasurable. If you're truly morally opposed to drinking, then try just heading out to a party and seeing if it's as bad as you think it is - I'm guessing you may have some preconceived notions about the drinking scene (I sure did) that I realized were mostly unfounded (not entirely, though).

I certainly now what all of you have gone through. My father was a drunk when I was a child, and to get back at him my mother would head down to the bar every now and then to get shit-faced. Then, as a runner in high school, I took my athletic code of conduct seriously and went off to college without ever having had a drink in my life. But, to answer the question, what I did my freshman year was get a job at a grocery store that would occupy my time on Friday and Saturday nights. It really worked out great because all of the kids from my small college town (attractive girls included) would come in to buy their alcohol, see me working, and then think to themselves, "Why the hell is he working on Friday night?"--but not in a bad way. I think that they respected me for it. After a while, they began asking me to go out with them, and then I could choose the scenes that I deemed more appropriate. If ever I didn´t want to go somewhere, I could always respond that I had to work, or had a ton of homework to get started on. Once you turn 21 and are allowed to go to bars with more mature individuals, drinking really is more of a social event. Just have patience and do what you do. People will respect you for it, and after a while everything becomes easier.

Know, I certainly know. Wow, I feel dumb.

I wasn't having fun with alcohol anymore (for many of the reasons you mentioned, plus bad hangovers), so I've taken a year off from the stuff. One key difference is that I still smoke a lot of weed, so I find my ways to party. I've hosted a few parties at my house this year and gone to several others (not every weekend though), and I usually just toke up and drink cokes. I'm not saying you should smoke dope, but you should still be able to have fun without alcohol. And even if you're not into the party scene there's plenty of shit to do that doesn't involve alcohol. Be creative, and at least get out of the house. I can be a hermit at times too, but don't let it become a habit.

Start hanging out with the asian crowd. Seriously, drinking is not a big part of their culture, and you will find the women are easier to get along with too.