Not Wiki Leaks wrote:
While he didn't send this letter, rumor is Rossi posted this to his Facebook page.
Dear Monsieur Race Director,
While I appreciate your concern for my completion of your marathon, I can promise you I ran as much in the time that I drove from relay exchange one to relay exchange five as I would in an entire marathon of running your course.
I had a once-in-a-lifetime experience, one that can’t be duplicated by me if I actual ran a marathon or was verified by race photographs .
In the 16 miles of the race I missed (which consisted of standardized miles that I can run at any time) I learned about dedication (or lack thereof), commitment (or lack thereof), love (of myself), perseverance (or lack thereof), overcoming adversity (traffic), equivocation, rationalization, culinary arts (stopped for a bagel on the way to the relay exchange), and physical education (running a marathon is painful; it's a lot easier to drive over half the distance.)
I overcame, injury, bad weather, the death of the last of my scruples, and many other obstacles (who knew there were tolls on I-78) to achieve an important personal goal. (The goal of getting to The Boston Marathon in spite of being unqualified to be there.)
I also experienced first-hand the love and support of thousands of others cheering on people with a common goal. (They even cheered me on, not realizing I had another goal entirely, as stated above.)
At the marathon, I watched blind runners (they didn't see me jump in with four miles to go), runners with gps watches that could actually verify their accomplishment, and debilitating sense of honesty and fair play. (Suckers)
I also paid tribute to the victims of a senseless discrimination of such heroes as Rosie Ruiz and that guy who jumped in front of Frank Shorter in Munich.
These are things I won't ever experience by running an actual marathon in 3:11
.
In addition I walked to the parking lot, had my parking validated, grabbed an ice cream cone, and still made it to exchange five in time to read a great debate on the use of Oxford commas. (Which I chose to eschew until now.)
I actually drove LONGER than a marathon so in actuality I am ahead of the game and would appreciate my time adjusted to under three hours to reflect that fact.
I appreciate the efforts of the wonderful timers and photographers and cherish the race everyone else got to experience at The Lehigh Valley Marathon.
But I wouldn’t hesitate to pull out of a marathon and drive towards the finish again for an experience like the one I had this past April at Boston - which once again, I would never have experienced by actually running your marathon
.
Thank you for your official time of 3:11 - it got me what I needed.