Are unmarried coaches in their 40s weird?

I mean coaching isn’t really a job that leads to marriage. You get paid very little and move around a lot.

The ones who are weird and creepy are sleeping with their 20 something athletes. Maybe the rest of them just don't want to be married which isn't weird at all.

onlyif wrote:

The ones who are weird and creepy are sleeping with their 20 something athletes.

No, the emasculated married cux living through decades the post-nuptial shut-off are jealous. It's far from weird, it's perfectly natural. It's like living in the Olympic Village every day. Men of all ages and stages in life who don't find fit college girls sexually attractive are weird... unless they aren't straight hetero.

wejo wrote:

Why would a coach in their 40s be single be any different than a non coach in their 40s being single?

So I think the OP is saying "Are single people in their 40s weird?" I'll go with no. Are there some weird ones? Of course. Are their some weird married people - of course.

And I'm in my 40s and single for another month. I'm not a coach but I'm glad I won't be weird in a month. Although I have been married before.

I did have more than few woman say they'd rather date a guy my age who had been married before. With the thinking being if you are single at my age you're either a player or have commitment issues.

I think the implication was who coaches work around.

A 40 year old single plumber who spends his day under kitchen sinks? Meh.

A 40 year old man who spends his day around hot, fit half naked teenagers? Slightly more creepy than the above scenario.

Amen.

I think you mean "segue."

Lol, you're assuming it's normal that a plumber can enter your house while you children/teenagers are home exposing his butt crack ?

What you should have said is:

"A 40 year old single plumber who spends his day under kitchen sinks? Meh.

A 40 year old man who spends his day around college student-athletes."

You're trying way too hard here. It almost feels as if some of you are projecting.

OP sounds like an immature and insecure individual, judging people who don't get married. More and more people are choosing not to get married anyways. Most people who do get married settle for someone and are not happy. People are realizing this more and more. Sure there are some unmarried people who may "not have their life together," but that is merely a projection by society based on the expected rat race they are programmed and brainwashed to run. OP, Do what makes you happy and stop obsessing about others or putting others down to feel better about your own mediocre life.

"Pedro Pan" is obviously using the topic as a vehicle to express her own relationship angst. The giveaway is the "divorced is a greater sign of personality problems than never married is" stipulation.

Maybe her ex-husband is a coach who left her aging ass for a younger gal. Or maybe she's never been married herself and is getting on in years. Or maybe she has an unrequited crush on a former coach.

Either way, she is probably hampered by unemployment and/or alcohol abuse herself.

Many female coaches over 40 are single...and yes some do sleep with their athletes. Why's it creepy?

wejo wrote:

Why would a coach in their 40s be single be any different than a non coach in their 40s being single?

So I think the OP is saying "Are single people in their 40s weird?" I'll go with no. Are there some weird ones? Of course. Are their some weird married people - of course.

And I'm in my 40s and single for another month. I'm not a coach but I'm glad I won't be weird in a month. Although I have been married before.

I did have more than few woman say they'd rather date a guy my age who had been married before. With the thinking being if you are single at my age you're either a player or have commitment issues.

"With the thinking being if you are single at my age you're either a player or have commitment issues." This is one of the dumbest and most reductive kinds of thinking. Could it possibly that you are single because you simply haven't found someone you like? Or you find enough satisfaction non-romantic relationships? Or ..... ? Or..... ? Jesus, the myopia here.

Banana Broad wrote:

Yes. By 40 you should have divorced and starting investigating how to buy sugar babies.

It's not just discus coaches either.

Good answer.

No shortage of articles about single men in their 40s

https://thestir.cafemom.com/love/165528/5_types_of_guys_youre

1. Mr. Set-In-His-Ways. This is the 40-something guy who has totally adjusted to living alone. Which is great. He's probably very happy. But he also wants to meet a woman. Only he doesn't want to change his life or schedule one iota for her. This is the guy who will say something early on like, "I have tennis on Wednesday, squash on Thursday, I'm camping all weekend, I need to spend Monday and Tuesday wriitng my novel, I walk my dog from 7 p.m. to 8 p.m. and I like to get to bed early. So can you meet for 20 minutes at 8:30 p.m. on Tuesday in three weeks? Oh, and can you come to my neighborhood?"

2. Mr. Commitmentphobe. Trust me, if he's gotten to 40 without having ever been married (for more than a few days) or in a relationship over 5 years, he is never going to be in one. No, he just doesn't have bad luck. No, it's not that he hasn't met the right woman. That's what he tell you -- and he probably believes it. But there is no way that a guy goes decades of dating without finding one woman worth sticking with for a decent length of time unless he just doesn't want to. You can really only get away with this if you're George Clooney.

3. Bitter Angry Dude. I don't know if it's that guys this age have seen a lot of relationship disappointment that has made them bitter and angry, or if their bitter/angry vibe is what makes women run from them to the point where they are still single at 40, but these guys abound. You can tell them right off the bat though, because even on the first phone call they'll nastily correct you about weird stuff or start an argument about the most innocuous of topics. A conversation with them might go something like, You: "So, how do you like your job?" Him: "My job? Why would you ask about that? I thought we were trying to get to know each other personally. I don't want to talk about my job!" Yeah, run.

4. The Flake. This is the 40-something man-child who still doesn't know how to make plans in advance and can't stick to any type of schedule. He's the guy who says he will call you Monday night and then doesn't. A week later, he emails you, "Hey, what are you up to?" You explain that he never called, so why is he asking? He apologizes and says he will call you that night. He doesn't. A week later, he emails again, saying, "Hey, want to meet up?" You explain that you still haven't spoken yet. He says -- well, you can guess. It goes on like this into infinity.

This one sums it up nicely:

https://www.ozy.com/opinion/never-married-men-over-40-date-able-or-debate-able/3327

Never-married heterosexual men over the age of 40 have always had a stigma. Especially back in 1970, when they represented only 4.9 percent of the male population. But I wondered: As marriage inches toward the take-it-or-leave-it category — for both sexes — and there are more never-married men between the ages of 40 and 44 than ever before (20.4 percent at last census count), is being a perpetual (hetero) bachelor still considered a little … creepy?

Yes, unmarried coaches in their 40s are weird, but not as weird as a married coach of any age. Married folks sit on the couch watching the same shows together every night so they don't have to talk or do anything engaging with one another. I find that weird AF.

A lot of guys who are hetero and prefer adult women just plain don't want to get married. Big shock, huh?

Now that Pedro Pan has provided 'links' to 'support' their bizarre angst, the question is, what is your beef with the subject in question?

What do you mean by 'working out'. Relationships have a beginning, middle and end - usually they run their course and you move on. It's normal. It's healthy. You learn, ,grow and experience someone new.

Yes, because everybody must be cut from the same mold.