Are unmarried coaches in their 40s weird?

No, I take care of them. It's often preferred.

Being single later is becoming more accepted and common now. Marriage and kids are not for everyone. Or they're in the closet.

Pedro Pan wrote:

By the time you reach 40 you should have a somewhat stable life. Coaches who are single, never married, over 40 something must have something wrong with them right? Personality problems, unable to grow up, drinking/drug addiction? Since they coach they must be trying to hang on to their youth.

Not including divorced although that may indicate other issues.

Discus

.5/10

could cue the Real Man response, which is always worth a chuckle

depends- does he look you in the eye or avert them, does he only engage in conversations related to running, does he ruminate over every calorie he eats, does he have strange obsessions like bragging about his high school mile time, does he share a dwelling with his parents, does he wear short shorts or worse yet jorts?

Is this supposed to segway into having relationships with athletes?

No. Not everyone needs to be married. Our divorce stats seem to speak to that.

Pedro Pan wrote:

By the time you reach 40 you should have a somewhat stable life. Coaches who are single, never married, over 40 something must have something wrong with them right? Personality problems, unable to grow up, drinking/drug addiction? Since they coach they must be trying to hang on to their youth.

Not including divorced although that may indicate other issues.

Discus

Who cares? Honestly? Why are you so concerned about their lives? Don't you have your own stuff to tend to?

Mind your own business.

Definitely creeps on some level. Keep your kids away from them, avoid if you get recruited by one.

Ain't for everyone wrote:

No. Not everyone needs to be married. Our divorce stats seem to speak to that.

Does it?

Almost everyone that gets a job leaves that job for another job at some point. About 100%.

Does that stat say that people shouldn't get jobs in the first place?

I know several unmarried college track coaches in that age range. Dedicating one's self to coaching track and field is not a high reward proposition. The constant moving, living in sketch ball apartments, tiny paychecks, never being home.... Unless they have a sugar mamma/daddy, there's not much they can offer in the way of stability. Potential spouses consider such things.

I've already considered that if anyone is interested in me, it's not because they're attracted to me physically.

*makes me puke thinking about myself*

It is unusual because so many coaches have married former athletes. After they are 40, they may be destined for a single life even if not by choice. Some of these coaches are only making $50k per year and they are travelling frequently.

Pedro Pan wrote:

By the time you reach 40 you should have a somewhat stable life. Coaches who are single, never married, over 40 something must have something wrong with them right? Personality problems, unable to grow up, drinking/drug addiction? Since they coach they must be trying to hang on to their youth.

It is very weird in the post-Title IX era, since that law was designed specifically to do away with much of competition that small college track coaches face in finding a mate willing to accept them.

I'm a coach in my 40s and do not have any of the issues you pose. I'm a pretty normal guy -- I have a good job, have a lot of friends, a social life, run every day, and am happy in life. I just never wanted to get married. This life I chose does not mean I am hanging on to my youth, have a drinking/drug addiction, I'm unable to grow up, or I have personality problems.

Pedro Pan wrote:

By the time you reach 40 you should have a somewhat stable life. Coaches who are single, never married, over 40 something must have something wrong with them right? Personality problems, unable to grow up, drinking/drug addiction? Since they coach they must be trying to hang on to their youth.

Not including divorced although that may indicate other issues.

Discus

Depends. If they're a high school coach and not married, maybe that's a little off. I wouldn't be so quick to judge somebody for not living up to the lifestyle you expect for them. A lot of Collegiate coaches are spending their lives between 25-40 years old moving up the coaching ranks. It's not uncommon to see a coach who is single in the profession. Imagine trying to date long term, but also moving across the country every 4 or 5 years. It takes a while in our profession to find a stable "home" to invest long term.

I've personally worked on staffs where everybody is single, and other staffs where everybody is married but me. I'm not 40, by the way, I'm right around 30 years old. I have a drink about once a month, don't do drugs, date, and have a very healthy lifestyle. I'm not aware of any mental issues I might have, but I guess you're the psychiatrist here.

Believe it or not, some people don't prefer to have kids like you'd expect them to. Kids can be a pain in the ass, and while I don't have any at this point I haven't ruled it out. I just have my priorities because I love my job and it is my priority.

Sadly, the divorce rate among coaches in pretty high in most national / international / professional-level sports and is probably above the national average which is already pretty bad. Looking around in 2018 there are more and more single people by choice due to those kinds of stats.

Coaching is not as glamorous as one might think, they're basically raising other people's kids and it's not the most lucrative profession regardless of if you are coaching Olympians or at a small college. It's also not the most stable life that includes a lot of travel on weekends (and it's not normal 9-5, M-F type gig). And in sports the circumstances can change quickly with staffs, administration, etc.

To each their own. I was coaching and had a chance to be married a couple of times, but it simply would not have been fair to the other person and it was either leave coaching or not get married. The reality is that you make choices in life and everything comes with a price. If you work in the sports world then the highs are pretty high and lows are pretty low.

Hey Pedro Pan, how does your face feel after that stomping?

This pretty much explains it. My wife rarely complained about the coaching lifestyle. However we had two children and after nineteen years it was time that I paid more attention to my own family. Looking back I don’t know how I did it. Thank god I was married to the right person.

Yes. By 40 you should have divorced and starting investigating how to buy sugar babies.

It's not just discus coaches either.