Mom buys expensive car 1 year before I go to university

kyoto wrote:

To all the boomers calling this person "entitled" or a "snowflake" - listen up. You're glib. The world is not the same place that you grew up in and prospered in. Moreover, as a parent you have an obligation to sacrifice so that your child can maximize his or her potential and chances of reproductive success. Saddling your child with a mountain of student loan debt is not going help them build character or whatever, it's just going to make them uncessarily miserable. But go ahead, buy your BMWs and Harley and mortgage the next generation's hopes and dreams as you ride off into the sunset.

My mom has a BMW and my dad has a Harley that just sits in the garage :(

My dad had a bit of money that could have been used to pay for me to go to college but he just didn't want to. He definitely did not spend it on expensive stuff for himself but that made no difference to the situation. So I went tot he cheapest place I could, took loans and worked summer jobs that paid almost nothing. The debt was a hassle for many years and I would not have inflicted that on my own kids unless there was no choice. But the money was my dad's to use or not use as he wanted. I loved him and never had any bad feelings about the whole business though I never quite understood the whole episode.

Doclove wrote:

Get a job

The best thing you can to is to #1 get a job and learn to take care of yourself.

Don't even think of going to college unless and until you can do this and afford it for yourself.

This being said, from someone with an M.S. degree that I got at age 34, college is way overrated.

The only thing that I learned from college was how to think for myself and that college was a waste of time.

Find a profession that you can excel in and then become your own boss.

And most of all learn to be frugal, not only with your money, but especially with your time and your habits.

Best of luck to you. Work hard and smart and you'll have it.

Worried wrote: ...my parents haven't saved a dime for my college education despite having high incomes.

Your college education is not your parents' responsibility. If you're old enough to attend college, then you are of adult age. What this means is that you need to work your own way through college, obtain student loans that YOU will repay, get a job that includes tuition reimbursement as one of its benefits, etc. The options are endless for anyone who is willing to make the effort instead of going through life like an entitled piece of crap.

God, I get so sick of candy-a$$ little punks thinking their parents owe them for life. Cut the apron strings and grow up, pansy.

The Unpowdered Butt wrote:

Worried wrote: ...my parents haven't saved a dime for my college education despite having high incomes.

Your college education is not your parents' responsibility. If you're old enough to attend college, then you are of adult age. What this means is that you need to work your own way through college, obtain student loans that YOU will repay, get a job that includes tuition reimbursement as one of its benefits, etc. The options are endless for anyone who is willing to make the effort instead of going through life like an entitled piece of crap.

God, I get so sick of candy-a$$ little punks thinking their parents owe them for life. Cut the apron strings and grow up, pansy.

But like I mentioned earlier, your access to financial aid is dependent on your parents' income if your are below a certain age. So his parents' status could be preventing him from getting things like Pell Grants, subsidized loans, need-based scholarships, etc. Not that his parents owe him anything, but if you decide you would rather buy yourself nice cars and motorcycles than help your child get an education, your priorities are messed up. And if you think an 18 year old should go take on 10's of thousands in oppressive student loan debt that will burden him/her for decades, you're insane.

Yes - this` wrote:

Doclove wrote:

Get a job

The best thing you can to is to #1 get a job and learn to take care of yourself.

Don't even think of going to college unless and until you can do this and afford it for yourself.

This being said, from someone with an M.S. degree that I got at age 34, college is way overrated.

The only thing that I learned from college was how to think for myself and that college was a waste of time.

Find a profession that you can excel in and then become your own boss.

And most of all learn to be frugal, not only with your money, but especially with your time and your habits.

Best of luck to you. Work hard and smart and you'll have it.

^ This is solid advice. I won't completely discount the value of college, but I do agree that it's overrated. I needed a college degree to get my first "real" job, but the degree didn't have to be related to the job itself. In fact, I have held three government positions and four corporate jobs in the last 27 years, and I used my degree for exactly none of them.

If you can't afford college on your own, then just work and learn on the job. If your company won't advance you without a degree, then take advantage of whatever tuition reimbursement benefit they may offer. If you have a computer, you don't even need to leave your home these days to get a quality degree from an accredited institution these days.

The Unpowdered Butt wrote: If you have a computer, you don't even need to leave your home these days to get a quality degree from an accredited institution these days.

Corrected: "If you have a computer, you don't even need to leave your home these days to get a quality degree from an accredited institution."

Doclove wrote:

Get a job

49 hours a week in the plumbing dept at a hardware got me through my last 2 years of college.

fatbody wrote: And if you think an 18 year old should go take on 10's of thousands in oppressive student loan debt that will burden him/her for decades, you're insane.

Granted, the student loans I had to pay off were nothing compared to what today's college graduates face. And I agree that taking on such huge amounts of debt should be a last-resort measure.

But I also think it's equally insane (and selfish) to think that parents have some obligation to take on the massive expense of their kids' college education. College might create an advantage, but is a luxury...not an absolute necessity.

Assume a parent has done everything in his power ensure a good K-12 education for his kids, provided them with opportunities to gain well-rounded life and educational experiences that could lead to better educational opportunities and academic scholarships, and perhaps supported the kids' way through high-level youth sports that might lead to athletic scholarships.....Assume all of this, among other things, and tell me when the parent gets to cut the apron strings and start concentrating on his own enjoyment of life and preparation for retirement.

At some point, the kid has to start doing for himself or he is never going to be a productive member of society, and he is never going to be completely fulfilled in his own life.

You're still ignoring the business of the aid package which is an essential part of how most people today expect to pay for college. If the OP's parents can afford a new BMW or something similar there's a good chance they have a fairly high income and as aid packages always expect that parents will pick up some of the cost, the higher the income, the lower the grant. I'm not saying that his parents are obligated to pay for college for him, but there is an expectation from people who award aid packages that they will, so if the parents are making good money and not doing so they're making the whole business much more difficult for him.

I think we're mostly in agreement here. I noticed that you didn't quote the part of my post where I specifically said his parents don't owe him anything.

I agree that college is a luxury and not for everyone. I also think that ridiculously expensive private universities are almost always a poor ROI. You mentioned a lot of good pro-active steps that parents can take to prepare their kids for life after high school, I just don't think you can totally take your hands off the wheel the instant they turn 18. Especially considering that on average people don't finish maturing until around 25.

As long as I have the means to do so*, I know that if my children are actively attending school and applying themselves and making good grades, I plan to take care of as much of their financial burden as I can. And I'm a little confused by your question of when the parent can start concentrating on his own enjoyment of life and preparing for retirement. To me, preparing my children to be successful, happy adults is one of the most rewarding things I do. The idea that I would be happier treating myself to a BMW or a Harley than I would paying for a few semesters of college for my children makes no sense to me at all.

*I think most experts would agree that it's more advantageous tax-wise to max out 401k/IRA contributions before you save for children's college, so "means to do so" here assumes that I'm already doing both of those things.

Thanks.

Another thing is that I never had any debt from going to college.

If you can't afford to pay it, don't go, which applies to everything, not just to college.

Always think of what's the cost vs benefit to what you are doing. Aim for the greatest benefit for the lowest cost,

preferably free. The old adage is as true today as it ever was, the best things in life are free.

Yes they sure are, but also invaluable. You can't buy them at any price.

Junior colleges are less expensive than 4 year schools, D3 is less expensive than D1 etc.

But learning on your own is the best. Always first look to learn on your own, and improve your own habits.

And you selfie entitled POS snowflakes aren't?

Cottonshirt wrote:

Raymond Meyo was ...

Meyo Field is a gift of Raymond D. Meyo, a 1964 graduate

Munchausan magic doesn't work in 2018.

How much does four years at Notre Dame cost in 2018? A conservative estimate is 268,000. Let's use 2017 mean annual income of $59,000. In 2018, a fictional Meyo's parents would have to spend EVERY SINGLE DOLLAR they make on Notre Dame tuition and then borrow $10,000 each year as well.

There is no way, in 1964, Meyo's parent's spent all of the money they made in a year at Notre Dame, then borrowed more money to both live on and pay for their son's education.

Pedal your 1960's fan fiction somewhere else.

Injury ended running career..... wrote:

Doclove wrote:

Get a job

49 hours a week in the plumbing dept at a hardware got me through my last 2 years of college.

You do realize that hardware stores don't schedule overtime in 2018, right? And the part time wages in 2018 cannot possibly make a dent in even State College tuition, right?

It's not 1970.

This is possibly the most out of touch post I have read on LetsRun this year. College is like it was in the 70's. Tuition has risen much much faster than inflation. It is no longer possible to pay even a fraction of costs with jobs that are available to college aged/experienced students. I am lucky I graduated in the late 90s because there is no way I could get through financially today.

Yes - this` wrote:

Doclove wrote:

Get a job

College is way overrated. The only thing that I learned from college was how to think for myself.

This seems pretty important?

6/10

Managed to flush out the cranky old curmudgeons who think that nothing has changed since 1980.

I love how everyone who gets riled up about this has their own 'I pulled myself up by my bootstraps (no thanks to my parents or government fatcats)' story. Even better, the 'I heard about this one guy who... ' story of some rags to riches hero.

OP, the help from your parents to pay for college would be really helpful, and the financial strain is going to limit some opportunities you might have otherwise had. The silver lining is that you are learning a hard lesson and you will hopefully decide to not be financially selfish/irresponsible when you have the opportunity to do so. Good luck!