This girl I dated briefly invited me to her Friendsgiving thing. Not sure if I should go. Advice?

Star wrote:

If you don't go, it's over forever.

LOL. Beta male.

YG wrote:

Promiscuousity. Can you see the chaos and confusion it's causing not to mention the additional dimensions of immorality it creates. Your emotions were hurt and confused, and you're still hurt and confused - chaos and confusion - yet you want to go back for more to destroy yourself further and are here looking for advice to devise cunning and trickery in order to achieve it. Why not make things easy for yourself; make yourself happy by SERIOUSLY looking for a serious committed that will bring you multiples of happiness and joy - chikdren/a family; instead if looking for devilish "fun".

Not to promote "promiscuity", but your simple response ignores the reality that plenty of non-promiscuous people still get hurt and confused while pursuing serious, committed relationships. And many people end up in unhappy marriages, and having kids does not make it better, never mind whatever "multiples of happiness and joy" means.

YG wrote:

Promiscuousity. Can you see the chaos and confusion it's causing not to mention the additional dimensions of immorality it creates. Your emotions were hurt and confused, and you're still hurt and confused - chaos and confusion - yet you want to go back for more to destroy yourself further and are here looking for advice to devise cunning and trickery in order to achieve it. Why not make things easy for yourself; make yourself happy by SERIOUSLY looking for a serious committed that will bring you multiples of happiness and joy - chikdren/a family; instead if looking for devilish "fun".

Overruled!

She either misses you or wants to show off her new boyfriend. Either way I’d go out of curiosity. And remember... it’s not gay if it’s a three way.

Star wrote:

If you don't go, it's over forever.

make her beg on her knees wrote:

LOL. Beta male.

Homo.

Go--you're obviously still crazy about her and want to spend every possible second in her presence, so don't deny yourself by trying to play it cool. Just don't act like a fool, drink too much, be the last to leave, or try to force anything. There's a chance she wants to show off her new boyfriend or otherwise firmly put you in your place, but there's also a chance she still likes you, too. If things go pleasantly enough, when you get home text her to say thanks for the invite. If she replies back quickly and cheerfully enough, ask her if there's any chance of getting together again, and see where it goes from there.

Is/was she a three hole girl? Make your decision accordingly.

Don't go. The road of life takes many turns, it is time for you to take your own journey ,even move to a different city . Maybe you meet down the road, maybe not . It doesn't matter.

From the description of the lifestyles, I'm guessing that the menu will include a nice bowl of cranberries with herpes and STD sauce over choked chicken. What a crowd, what a crowd.

If she shows off her boyfriend look scared and uncomfortable , ask to speak with her privately. Tell her you have AIDS. Enjoy your turkey.

Take her into the spare bedroom where all the coats are piled on the bed and bang her up the backdoor.

Turkey Baster wrote:

She either misses you or wants to show off her new boyfriend. Either way I’d go out of curiosity. And remember... it’s not gay if it’s a three way.

I am about 98% sure she would not bring a bf and invite me, so if she's inviting me, it's just going to be her going.

I suppose you guys are right. I'm not actually sure how I feel about the idea of getting back together as I'm figuring out some things in my own life right now, but just going doesn't mean we're getting married or anything. I can go and just feel things out. I appreciate the input.

This isn't going to end well.

Either attend and leave as acquaintances or don't go.

Too much chaos and uncertainty.

chances are good that some other guy with feelings for her will be there too. So do you want to compete for her attention or just play it cool and be "the man" in the room. By going, you may discover that she isn't really a long term prospect for you. It would be good to arrive at this conclusion as soon as possible. Additionally, you may find one of her friends attractive which could lead to something better in the future. From my experience, going to this event is a positive move even though it feels like of lame

Why not get together a few days before and tell her how you feel? If she wants to get back together, Thanksgiving will be way better. If she just wants to be friends, you can opt out.

The Barnacle wrote:

Why not get together a few days before and tell her how you feel? If she wants to get back together, Thanksgiving will be way better. If she just wants to be friends, you can opt out.

Keep in mind, he was the guy that broke things off. If she's vaguely healthy, that is a pretty strong reason to only be casual, no benefits, friends at best.

You can't discount there are other dynamics in play such that she wants some arm candy, or some kind of weird third-wheel dynamic. Since it was suggested that both people came from not-great backgrounds, lots of possibilities for emotional chaos. It also might be the case OP is fun and friendly and that's all she's looking to get out of it. Lots of legitimate possibilities.

In one way, the honesty could provide some clarity, which OP needs to practice. In another, IMO, it's too much risk to load the event with so many uncertain feelings.

OP, maybe the middle ground is to pass on the "friend" event, but use her contacting you as an opportunity to be honest with her and see if the interest is reciprocated.

Sounds like she 's the one. Go.

Mixed feelings wrote:

We were friends with benefits for months and kept things very light

Most people look at FWB as at least heavy petting.

From what I’ve observed, being friends with benefits from the get-go shows you aren’t interested in having a serious, long-lasting relationship. But now you’re considering it. Ya’ll need to stop sending mixed signals.