Does a girl's sexual past matter?

isi wrote:

Big Hester wrote:

That's what bothers me more than the countless sexual partners. I even mentioned that she let him treat her that way. She unashamedly agreed that she did. I asked if they watched tv together on the couch. Played board games. Went anywhere. She said nope, just sex.

She knows she was used, yet doesn't feel bad about it. In fact, she still talks to the guy (he now lives out of state).

Sounds like they used each other. There's nothing wrong with that if sex is all they are both after. The fact that she still talks to him without any sex (and assuming he talks back) makes it sound like she wasn't used at all. They were just hookup buddies.

I guess so. Although she did say she really liked him. Her words were she "fell hard." She did ask him to take her out and he always had an excuse. He always avoided her at work. She said he would even move to the other side of the hall and elevator to avoid her.

Being his booty call was even her words. Add that in with her countless sexual partners and it concerns me as to what kind of girl she is.

Big Hester wrote:

Why did you ask? Why did she tell you?

In general, I don't want any amateurs in my bed. What they did in the past - I could not care less. I am unusual in that it doesn't bother me.

If it bothers you, move on. But bang her first....

Would you marry a woman that has been with 100 men? I wouldn't simply because if she's been with that many dudes she's seriously imbalanced.

Yes it does. I've never met a women with a large sexual history that wasn't a complete nutcase.

Big Hester wrote:

isi wrote:

Sounds like they used each other. There's nothing wrong with that if sex is all they are both after. The fact that she still talks to him without any sex (and assuming he talks back) makes it sound like she wasn't used at all. They were just hookup buddies.

I guess so. Although she did say she really liked him. Her words were she "fell hard." She did ask him to take her out and he always had an excuse. He always avoided her at work. She said he would even move to the other side of the hall and elevator to avoid her.

Being his booty call was even her words. Add that in with her countless sexual partners and it concerns me as to what kind of girl she is.

Well, if she fell hard and was okay being treated as you described, then that's a bigger danger sign than the number of partners.

not if you want the herp and several different strains of warts

mellow seeds wrote:

What a bunch of dorks.

Someone really thinks 15 is a lot of people by the time you are 30? If you start having sex at 15 that is 1 person a year. You are delusional is you don't think most single people who are moderately attractive and not socially inept don't sleep with way, way more than that.

^This.

Has life experience wrote:

Yes it does. I've never met a women with a large sexual history that wasn't a complete nutcase.

I´ve never net a man with a large sexual history that wasn´t a complete nutcase.

runner girl wrote:

Has life experience wrote:

Yes it does. I've never met a women with a large sexual history that wasn't a complete nutcase.

I´ve never net a man with a large sexual history that wasn´t a complete nutcase.

I've never met a woman that wasn't a complete nutcase!

Keep in mind there are a LOT of "1"s out there. Men and women from strongly religious backgrounds. Also probably 5-10% of men and perhaps a similar percent of women are zeros due to being butt-ugly and/or socially inept.

Doesn't matter to me as long as she doesn't have any STDs. Many guys are afraid they'll be compared to her past sexual partners, but this concern is unreasonable because women don't enjoy sex in the physical sense. They're more concerned with pleasing you than you are with pleasing them. Kinda like how when you encounter a bear in the wild you have to remember that he's more afraid of you than you are of him. Same principle.

It's ok to screw sluts until you're in your mid-twenties. Then it's time to look for a decent girl you can settle down with.

I've never met a woman. :(

To begin with, you shouldn't be dating girls unless you're in high school. First decide if she is a woman or not. You can't possibly know her sexual history unless you've been discussing it with her. Why would you do that? It's none of your business. I expect her to have some skills or to be a good student. Other than that, I don't care about her past. I'd never date a virgin though.

The problem wasn't so much that she was someone's booty call, but what was she doing while this was going on? Was she in between relationships? Was she "exclusive" with someone and doing this on the side? I think your bigger issue would be if she was in relationship(s) and banging this guy on the side. If she was not in another committed relationship at the time, for whatever reason, but had needs herself that this guy was satisfying, then no big deal. I would also be concerned if she still works with this guy or is still in touch. You can bet she will not ignore his texts once she starts seeing you. You can also just take this for what it is and have some fun with her as a place holder if you don't think she's relationship material.

Big Hester wrote:

How serious would you get with a girl who has had so many male sex partners that she can't remember the number?

Her last "boyfriend" was a guy who just used her for a year for sex. They never went out. They worked together and he even avoided her when he saw her. But he would call her and she would go right to his place for sex only. She even admits she was his booty call.

Guys, what do you think? Is her past just that, or is this one a little too much on the skanky side?

I would've still dated that girl up until I was 26 or 27, then I still would've hooked up with a girl like that but at that point only dated girls I thought might be marriageable. Totally personal preference though. Ended up dating a girl when she was 22 and I was 28 that I eventually married. I am her only sexual partner (yeah, yeah, joke it up) and she knows she is not my only one but has the sense not to ask how many I've had.

Dare I say that this thread is worthless without pics?

Ted Underhill wrote:

The problem wasn't so much that she was someone's booty call, but what was she doing while this was going on? Was she in between relationships? Was she "exclusive" with someone and doing this on the side? I think your bigger issue would be if she was in relationship(s) and banging this guy on the side. If she was not in another committed relationship at the time, for whatever reason, but had needs herself that this guy was satisfying, then no big deal. I would also be concerned if she still works with this guy or is still in touch. You can bet she will not ignore his texts once she starts seeing you. You can also just take this for what it is and have some fun with her as a place holder if you don't think she's relationship material.

Funny you bring up the texting thing. She does still text him. And takes his phone calls.

He's moved away. I asked her if she would meet him if he came in for a visit, and she said sure, "But I wouldn't do anything with him."

She wasn't in a relationship at the time she was his booty call, but she really likes this guy and she willing let him treat her like a street hooker. How can a girl not have any self respect and let someone use her like that?

Big Hester wrote:

Funny you bring up the texting thing. She does still text him. And takes his phone calls.

He's moved away. I asked her if she would meet him if he came in for a visit, and she said sure, "But I wouldn't do anything with him."

She wasn't in a relationship at the time she was his booty call, but she really likes this guy and she willing let him treat her like a street hooker. How can a girl not have any self respect and let someone use her like that?

She really likes the guy, but he wasn't interested in a relationship for whatever reason, so she was willing to take what he was offering. I would think this behavior would be more common in late teens and into the twenties, and then start to wane after 30. If he never had a change of heart and wanted more, I would think she would want to move on. Of course, he could have once been in your position and there were red flags with this girl and determined that she wasn't worth any more than an occasional hookup.

Big Hester wrote:

Funny you bring up the texting thing. She does still text him. And takes his phone calls.

He's moved away. I asked her if she would meet him if he came in for a visit, and she said sure, "But I wouldn't do anything with him."

She wasn't in a relationship at the time she was his booty call, but she really likes this guy and she willing let him treat her like a street hooker. How can a girl not have any self respect and let someone use her like that?

You asking this question tells me you have no idea how women are wired, sexually. They crave being treated as sluts by the right guy to do this to them. That's not to say they don't desire stability/trust etc you find in "normal' and 'traditional' relationship. it's called dualistic sexual strategy/ hypergamy.

Nothing wrong with it.