what is the dumbest thing a teammate ever said?

Way to steal someone else's thread idea

"my heart begins to skip beats whenever it goes too fast, but my doctor told me it's nothing to worry about" teammate's justification for not telling anyone she had a heart condition after she suddenly stops running and lies down off the track

new 19min 5k guy who quit after his first xc season.

ME: how fast was that 1000?

HIM: umm...about..3:50.

ME: how do you know that, you dont have a watch...

HIM: oh i dont need a watch i count in my head.

"how long is the boston marathon?" dumb...

Sub 4:20 Miler wrote:

new 19min 5k guy who quit after his first xc season.

ME: how fast was that 1000?

HIM: umm...about..3:50.

ME: how do you know that, you dont have a watch...

HIM: oh i dont need a watch i count in my head.

That's actually pretty cool

I got a long list. Quick background: I was #1 man on an extremely crappy D3 team. How crappy? I never broke 4 (1500), 15:50 (5K), or 26:50 (8K XC) and could run our #2 guy's PRs comfortably in practice.

1) Our #7 runner goes through these periods where he decides he would train with me and become good. He's never broken 30 minutes in XC. Every single time he runs on my shoulder for about 5 minutes and starts bitching "Why are we running so fast? Isn't this supposed to be an easy day???"

2) Same dumbass tells our coach that he feels like he should just train for awhile and not race until he gets in really good shape. "Like when I can easily run sub-4 1500 and sub-9 3K". I told him it sounds like he doesn't want to race.

3) Our #4 runner had the crappiest sense of pace ever. He's never broken 17 minutes for a 5K, but one day we go out and run a 30-minute tempo on the roads and I lose him 10 minutes in. When we get back he tells our coach we "ran about 5:20 mile pace the entire time, felt pretty comfortable"

Sub 4:20 Miler wrote:

new 19min 5k guy who quit after his first xc season.

ME: how fast was that 1000?

HIM: umm...about..3:50.

ME: how do you know that, you dont have a watch...

HIM: oh i dont need a watch i count in my head.

Some people can actually do that.

from female D1 runners:

what's in the steeple pit? sand?

how far is 3k?

last semester my GPA plummeted above 3.0!

Standing around after practice my teammate trying to quote Prefontaine:

"Never sacrifice anything less than the gift!"

We all just stared at him for a while until he turned it over in his head a few times...

I've heard the "How far is..." many times, but it's not stupidity as much as not asking what they really mean (How many laps is...).

At a very good program we had a walk on in the first week of tryouts ask this question in response to the coach's question of "what was your mileage over the summer?"

"Does rollerblading count as mileage?"

he didn't make it

Not a teammate, but...

I was training with a Division 1 program, along with a few other post-collegians. They had one good guy (AA in XC) then about a two-minute gap to their #2. Once we did the workout and three of us post-collegians and the #1 guy ran as a group while everyone else ran with their groups. It was a timed workout, so regardless of how fast we ran we should have all finished together. Anyway, when we got back, everyone else was in the van, ticked off that they had been waiting for so long.

A week later, one of the guys asked one of the other post-collegians, "What do I need to do to get better?" and the post-collegian replied, "You could start by doing the workouts."

Once on a training run, the subject of the All-American Rejects song "Move Along" came up, and one of my teammates conceded that whenever he's during a race or a workout, he just sings that song to himself and he is, then, able to "move along" through the pain. We were all baffled by this admission, but before anyone could lambast the guy, another guy on the team chimed in, saying "Yeah? Well, I wrote a song that I sing to make myself go faster. It goes: SPRINT MOTHAF***AAAAHH!" and he took off sprinting ahead of us. A classic moment.

Thats not dumb, that is classic xc/track easy run awesomeness

Vibram Middle Finger wrote:

Once on a training run, the subject of the All-American Rejects song "Move Along" came up, and one of my teammates conceded that whenever he's during a race or a workout, he just sings that song to himself and he is, then, able to "move along" through the pain. We were all baffled by this admission, but before anyone could lambast the guy, another guy on the team chimed in, saying "Yeah? Well, I wrote a song that I sing to make myself go faster. It goes: SPRINT MOTHAF***AAAAHH!" and he took off sprinting ahead of us. A classic moment.

injured teammate

"im just going to lift a lot and gain a ton of weight, if i can do that i should be able to run under 1:50 once my injury is healed" his PR when he said that was 1:58, never broke that

When I was a slow but enthusiastic junior varsity XC runner, my fast teammate who was on varsity and was running regionals that week shook his head in lament and whined "You're lucky you don't have to run regionals." He was dead serious. I wanted to bitch slap him.

Couple of college freshmen:

stupid girl 1: "Wait, who is Pre?"

stupid girl 2: "I don't think he goes here."

not really what someone said, but one day in practice we're doing some laps around the track for a warmup or something, our previous #1 guy was injured and was on the other side of the track and had to start walking, so the new #1 guy next me calls out to him across and goes "state champion training right there" and starts clapping. as he is clapping he runs into the bleachers flips over, and breaks his leg, blood everywhere. he was out rest of the season. funny as hell, he had a great sense of humor about it to.