First, a family heirloom is something of real value, linking you to the past and maintaining a family tradition, whereas a store-bought ring has no story to it and costs a lot of money with no benefit. So, don't buy rings; get your mother to open up the jewelry box with the rings and choose nice ones. Then every time you look at the rings you think of your family.
Second, the wedding ceremony should be a very happy and memorable occasion. So, whatever brings that about fits the occasion. But there is no straight correlation between more expensive and happy/memorable. I looked at a lot of expensive banquet halls and they were kitschy. Make it a place that is meaningful, beautiful, and somehow associated with you and the woman. A public park, a beautiful old public building, etc. Sometimes these places are cheap or free. Definitely go for the aesthetics.
Third, for the other details, be creative. For the flowers, you can often get them wholesale. For the food, self-cater. Go to your favorite restaurants and give them some big orders for the day. That will taste far better than the caterers and will be far less expensive. Buy beer at a specialty store with a huge selection and cheap prices (most of the male guests will love it if you make the reception into a beer tasting event), and leave the wine purchases to someone who likes wine.
Fourth, of course, do not spend years planning. Just get the venues and dates, so that you can let your guests know informally way in advance (don't invite lots of your parents' friends or many of your not very good friends or business associates; go for people who you want to see), and then spend the last month working hard on the preparations.
Fifth, choose a stunning location for a honeymoon and remember that big resorts are trashy, have bad food, and are expensive. Go for the quiet, out of the way place and then you will f*** like bunnies.