Dumbest thign you ever did as a kid?

I misspelled the word "thing" and it made people question my intelligence. After all, it is just like other "ing" words, right?

Thign is something different from Thing.

Started posting on letsrun, but that was in the 80s and everyone was doing it, like cocaine.

Stuck peas from my father's garden up my nose- had to have them extracted in the ER room.

Frequently absconded with my father's gasoline tanks and hid them in the woods. Loved the smell of gasoline fumes and partook in them with my brother. It's a wonder we are both functioning adults to this day.

Played witchie-poo with neighborhood children, the goal of which was to burn someone at the stake. Caught one kid, tied him to a tree and was rummaging through the kitchen cabinet trying to find matches. Thankfully my mother caught me searching for matches and quickly sent everyone home.

I had an absolute fascination with magnifying glasses. An adult relative unknowingly gifted me with a high-powered lens in an attempt to fuel my interest in physics. I used that lens to torture poor ants, caterpillars and salamanders. I also nearly set the forest afire on more than one occasion.

I used to concoct a napalm mixture with powdered sugar and lighters fluid. I won't bother you with the details of these antics.

I was a parent's worst nightmare as a child. I could go on, but I won't.

Put tweezers in the electrical outlet.

Made nitrogen triiodide in chemistry class. One of my XC teammates then dumped it all over the floor. I spent quite some time clean iodine stains off the floor.

Today, I'd probably be arrested under some "zero-tolerance" policy.

Ate cat poo on a dare from a friend (just a nibble).

-packing gun powder into a tennis ball and lighting a fuse to see what happens while standing about 5ft away just so i wouldn't miss the action.

-throwing a desk at a teacher

join the choir at church.

I had unprotected consentual gay sex with your father.

I POOPED RAINBOWS

Jessica I forget her last name. Dumb as a plank but great in the sack. Serious attempt to commit suicide by holding her breath.

I was quite the kleptomaniac in high school.

Had an affinity for nice/designer clothes (Polo, Tommy, Armani,etc.) the problem was my family didnt have alot of money

became a pretty good shoplifter until one day I was caught, well i wasnt actually "caught", but was spotted and sprinted out of Macys outrunning the security guy who no doubt would've gotten me in deep sh*t had I let him arrest me.

was too scared to ever try it again.

Hopped in a pool in my underwear and a Donald Duck Halloween mask at 3 1/2 years old thinking the mask turned me into a duck and that I could swim.

I ended up on the bottom of the pool and was lucky the owner came home, saw me, and saved me. Eventually his wife was my PE teacher in 7th grade.

The kicker is the girl I was with convinced me to go for it and just went home and told my mom and her mom that she didn't know where I was.

Eventually we got married. Our moms found us in her bed in our underwear. I think we were 4 then.

redux wrote:

Hopped in a pool in my underwear and a Donald Duck Halloween mask at 3 1/2 years old thinking the mask turned me into a duck and that I could swim.

I ended up on the bottom of the pool and was lucky the owner came home, saw me, and saved me. Eventually his wife was my PE teacher in 7th grade.

The kicker is the girl I was with convinced me to go for it and just went home and told my mom and her mom that she didn't know where I was.

Eventually we got married. Our moms found us in her bed in our underwear. I think we were 4 then.

Wow wow wow

I didn't even read the shoplifting post.

Amongst other things during middle school me and my friends got into baseball cards. This was the late 80s and baseball cards were freaking retarded. So we started lifting as many packs as we could. The idea was we'd sort through them with a Beckett's guide to find the most valuable cards and sell them to the inscrutable comic book dealer.

We made good money running that system.

Funny enough we also lifted comics from his and other stores and sold those back to them. This was during the Tod McFarland boom prior to Image comics.

Those things would go from $1.25 retail to $24.00 overnight because of the way they printed them. Same thing with graphic novels. We made a mint off that stuff.

Eventually my mom found a few $100 worth of comics and graphic novels that I didn't have an allowance for and it all came crashing down.

That ended that fantasy.

redux wrote:

Hopped in a pool in my underwear and a Donald Duck Halloween mask at 3 1/2 years old thinking the mask turned me into a duck and that I could swim.

I ended up on the bottom of the pool and was lucky the owner came home, saw me, and saved me. Eventually his wife was my PE teacher in 7th grade.

The kicker is the girl I was with convinced me to go for it and just went home and told my mom and her mom that she didn't know where I was.

Eventually we got married. Our moms found us in her bed in our underwear. I think we were 4 then.

Same thing happened to me but without the duck in the pool abandonment thing, the PE teachers wife thing, the getting married part and I'm pretty sure there was no underwear involved when we got caught during the summer before my twin sister and I turned six.

Wow. Freaky deaky.