Single, 35, no kids: what does society think?

Society wrote:

Personally, I view you as a tragic waste of space. Your parents put a lot of work into you and have nothing to show for their efforts. Sad. Just sad.

But seriously, you will probably die a lonely old man. I will die somewhat younger, penniless and broken after being henpecked and burdened for decades by a ever increasingly needy wife and family. And I wouldn't trade places with you for the world.

Try taking on the burdens of another human being. You might be surprised how much happiness it brings.

I'm single myself, but I think there in an inaccuracy in the above post. And that is the part about the married guy dying younger. I believe statistics say it's the other way around, and that married people live longer, supposedly.

A good friend once said to me "it's better to be single with an interest in getting married, then to be married and wish you were single".

I think life is way to broad to put a general statement out there about what someone should or shouldn't do. However, one thing that the stats prove is that there are A LOT of people who got married that shouldn't have that ended up divorced.

Getting married just for the sake of "being married" is about the biggest mistake you can make in life outside of committing crimes.

A good marriage is a wonderful thing as it was intended to be, but a bad marriage is a nightmare.

Look before you leap...

eastong wrote:

I'm single myself, but I think there in an inaccuracy in the above post. And that is the part about the married guy dying younger. I believe statistics say it's the other way around, and that married people live longer, supposedly.

Either way, the living shall envy the dead.

joke time on the stage wrote:

well. wrote:

I just knew that this semi-Nazi would show up again.

How did Hitler tie his shoes?

In little nazis (not-sies)!

There is know such thing as a semi-knotsy.

Society wrote:

Personally, I view you as a tragic waste of space. Your parents put a lot of work into you and have nothing to show for their efforts. Sad. Just sad.

But seriously, you will probably die a lonely old man. I will die somewhat younger, penniless and broken after being henpecked and burdened for decades by a ever increasingly needy wife and family. And I wouldn't trade places with you for the world.

Try taking on the burdens of another human being. You might be surprised how much happiness it brings.

Everyone dies alone.

Read Eric Klinenberg's "Going Solo, The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone." It's an excellent window into what is going on with living arrangements.

Society: just another word for you and me. Don't spend another moment fretting about "society."

I'm single. Live alone. It's incredible: the freedom, the independence and the pure joy of having my own space. Wouldn't trade for nuthin'.

Insecure about my standing wrote:

I'm single, never married, and no kids. Age 35. I work full time and run recreationally. Running is my primary hobby. I've never married, and don't see myself ever doing so.

So...how does society view me? Loner, loser, perv, what?

I'd say you are doing GREAT. Don't change a thing. F*** what "society" might think. Your Life is Your Business and no one else's.

I am 44, single, never married, no kids, no house, my work is "occasional" but I have a fully paid up 2012 truck and plenty of money in the bank. I run 100 miles a week and can happily say that I ran sub 2:20 for a marathon cleanly.

Losers...

Funny how it works: I see beleaguered husbands and wives, weighed down by work, kid responsibilities, household duties and trying to keep a marriage afloat. The first thing that pops into my mind is not, "wow, that looks SO appealing."

Everyone needs to do what is best for them. If the above appeals to you (for more years than you dare to consider) then GO FOR IT.

I won't be thinking you are on some amazing path. Just the opposite. Doesn't take much creativity to forge a life like that one. But that's just me. Who is thrilled to have decided against what looks like plain old drudgery.

From the inside out wrote:

A good friend once said to me "it's better to be single with an interest in getting married, then to be married and wish you were single".

I think life is way to broad to put a general statement out there about what someone should or shouldn't do. However, one thing that the stats prove is that there are A LOT of people who got married that shouldn't have that ended up divorced.

Getting married just for the sake of "being married" is about the biggest mistake you can make in life outside of committing crimes.

A good marriage is a wonderful thing as it was intended to be, but a bad marriage is a nightmare.

Look before you leap...

Best and most accurate post in the thread. Marriage is one long compromise and if you don't have the constitution for it, you better not venture there.

i can definitely see myself being in the OP's shoes in a few years. i like my job + running too damn much, i don't care to make time for other shizz.

mgm wrote:

Single people at that age, male or female, are lonely. .

not true. maybe they're just introverts. for some (as Sathre said) "hell is other people".

[quote]late20ssinglerunnerguy wrote:

i can definitely see myself being in the OP's shoes in a few years. i like my job + running too damn much, i don't care to make time for other shizz.

[/quote

You're missing out on fatherhood sir.

Really the only reason to have kids is so that you can start training them once they turn 7 or 8.

Pewow wrote:

Really the only reason to have kids is so that you can start training them once they turn 7 or 8.

Contrary to popular belief, having children is inherently a very selfish act. You are acknowledging that you need to perpetuate your own being.

Insecure about my standing wrote:

I'm single, never married, and no kids. Age 35. I work full time and run recreationally. Running is my primary hobby. I've never married, and don't see myself ever doing so.

So...how does society view me? Loner, loser, perv, what?

child molester

Definitely either a homosexual or a pedophile.

Probably a serial killer.

Society thinks you're weird, and not in a good way. I get this even at the age of 24 for never having a girlfriend (I have only ever had one lasting a significant amount of time though I have dated around quite a bit). I honestly have no idea what most people think, but I'm sure some of my relatives have wondered if I'm gay, and I have been given sympathy by others and bewilderment that I'm single given I'm a pretty good looking dude with a lot going for him. Unfortunately I'm just very independent and don't enjoy people as much as I enjoy time to myself (and the FREEDOM of being single). Even now I have a girlfriend I've been seeing about a month, and even though she's a good girl, attractive, gives me plenty of sex, etc, I find myself frequently wondering if I should break up with her so I can go flirt with other girls, can go to bed when I want (she keeps me up late), can have my weekends back, etc. I don't know... It actually bothers me that I'm not "normal" in this area as I do feel the judging eyes of my friends and family and society, and I like the idea of family and kids. I'm not sure I will ever have any though.

In the end we're all just trying to live our lives the best we know how (or should be), and each person's life is their own to live how they choose. No harm done if someone doesn't want kids. In fact, they are probably doing a service to the world as we are already horribly overpopulated. Try not to worry what other people think.

Fer Pete's sake, get a grip. Look around and take in the fact that "society" is made up of untold configurations when it comes to how people organize their personal lives.

24? Don't make me laugh. Nobody gives two figs if you are married or not. Society doesn't think you are wierd. Society is even't noticing.

Guppy, you say you don't even want to spend time with this great girl so you can get your weekends back and go to bed when you want and have freedom....yet you like the idea of family and kids? pssshhhhh.

You think you like the idea of family and kids. But trust me when I say everything you have mentioned above means that you will be fvcking miserable with kids.

I'm not criticizing you for this. Like you said, it's OK. I watch my poor schlub of a brother going through this sh!t and he is fvcking miserable!! Poor bast@rd got suckered into it.