Am I an idiot? Just broke up with my hot, fast (16:30 5k), cool, fun GF who loves me

Dave the Dude wrote:

Whatever, junior. It is obvious that you care more about yourself than any woman with the misfortune to date you and more about this thead than anyone reading or posting.

I don't need to read every letter of your drivel to know that you are a selfish little prick that needs to grow up.

I would love to respond to your post, but you have not read the entire thread. You must earn my respect before you can play with us.

I'm not reading the seven pages of this shit. But based on the title, you're a fvuckin idiot. I hope you never find anyone else as good ever again.

24/7/365 On the move wrote:

I'm not reading the seven pages of this shit. But based on the title, you're a fvuckin idiot. I hope you never find anyone else as good ever again.

You cannot even correctly spell "f***ing" and you call me an idiot? Ha ha!

must be true to yourself in the end

I have given up on this thread. It's sad a few fck'in tards on letsrun can ruin such a good thread.

Thank you to all those who contributed.

Signing off.

JK! Keep those suggestions coming. I'm looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

Run2b... wrote:

Not hung up on the EX. She is engaged and will be married in 2 months. .

Then you should NEVER ever mention her. Serious red flag from you.

Also, why are you going to analyze this? It's over. You made your decision now stick to it. Do you care about this girl AT ALL? If you have one bit of care or respect for this girl, then have the decency to leave her alone and let her go on with her life. You don't get to change your mind, unless you are a total jerk.

And, yeah, pull yourself together. You do sound like a headcase. If you think that you are so good at getting chicks, then you should just move on and put this poor girl out of her misery.

But I'm guessing you will ignore this advice and torture her and yourself just a bit more.

SIMPLE ANSWER:

And think not you can direct the course of love,

for love,

if it finds you worthy,

will direct your course.

Hey brother, there's no check list of attributes that makes for a good wife. You don't have the sense that she's the one you want to marry...well, whether that feeling is justified or whether it's complete crap, it's there, so breaking up with her is the right thing. Now, will you regret it down the road? Maybe, but maybe not. You telling us that she's attractive and fast and fun and loves you isn't anywhere close to enough to convince me that she's all that. If I were you, I'd do some soul searching and try to determine what it is about her that makes her not worthy of being your wife. Possible reasons (and I'm being 100% serious here:

1) She doesn't have a penis. Not saying you're gay brother, but some men don't really have a grasp of what team they play for until later on. Could you be gay? I'm being serious here.

2) Does she spend too much money?

3) Is she irresponsible?

4) Is she mean?

5) Is she dumber than you'd like?

6) Is she smarter than you'd like?

7) Is she not as accomplished as you'd like?

8) Is she from a different class than you are in (lower or higher) and so that makes you uncomfortable.

9) Is she needy?

10) Is she not good enough or frequent enough in the bedroom?

11) Some big religious or philosophical difference with you?

12) Can't imagine her as a mother and you want kids?

13) You CAN imagine her as a mother and you DON'T want kids?

14) You feel like you've not played the field enough?

Gotta be something brother. Discover what it is, and then either decide it's too much to overcome or decide you want to overcome it and do so.

FVUCK YOU

I would look at the extremes. Assume that this is the most "in love" you will ever fall for a girl. Given that fact, would you rather a) settle, or b) be single the rest of your life?

Said another way, if this is the best you'll ever get, is it good enough? If it is, then I would seriously consider sticking around. If you'd be just as happy a single fish swimming in the sea, you should stick to your guns.

Ummmm.... I'm pretty sure German Fernandez is faster than 16:30 for a 5k. I can't believe no one has pointed this out. I thought people knew about running here.

No pics, no chick.

Yea, you are an idiot. I was in an identical situation and broke up for reasons like yours. It's something I regret to this day. Don't take advantage when you have something great. Remember what it was like when you met her and imagine her with someone new. If you really aren't happy though, do what you gotta do i guess. Just make sure you don't regret it later...

Ok all sarcasm aside....

I think the big question you have to ask yourself is can you not see yourself marrying this PARTICULAR girl, or can you just not see yourself getting married at all?

My guess is that if you have been dating this girl for 1.5 years, eventually you do see yourself marrying someone. So after 1.5 years with this girl, if you cannot at least picture this happening without a lot of mental persuasion, I think you are perfectly right for doing what you did. The reason it is so hard is because you truly love and care about her, but that doesn't mean you are IN LOVE with her.

Just suck it up and know that no matter how you go about breaking up, it's going to be really F*ing hard and it will probably suck for awhile. Adjusting to being single after a year and a half won't be cake-walk, but then again 18 months isn't that long to date someone.

Just really make sure that you sit down and talk it out with her. She needs more than just that. Obviously this girl is a bit more in love with you than you are with her. That doesn't mean you are in the wrong. It's just the honest truth. Be truthful with her, but blunt. If she's a great girl, she'll appreciate it in the long run.

Good luck.

Wow - yes, my vote is that you are an idiot, but not because you are breaking up with your fast, hot gf. I really have no relationship advice for you except that you are young and if she doesn't seem like the one - she probably isn't. I'm just shocked you posted all of this on lets run. I hope, for her sake she never sees this post. I would never want to be in that situation and I'd imagine you'd feel the same. If she's run 16:30 for 5k she's probably on lets run and if she's not, I'm sure one of her friends are. It's a very immature way to manage a relationship. Most people discuss these situations privately with close friends and family. Seems like you are just looking for attention.

once a runner... wrote:

Yea, you are an idiot. I was in an identical situation and broke up for reasons like yours. It's something I regret to this day. Don't take advantage when you have something great. Remember what it was like when you met her and imagine her with someone new. If you really aren't happy though, do what you gotta do i guess. Just make sure you don't regret it later...

The same thing happened to me.

What if she was a sub 16 min 5k runner, would you still feel the same way?

It seems like a lot of this relationship is based off the fact she is fast.

ever do anything to get her back?