What is the worst / most bizarre thing you've done while drunk?

woke up in the middle of the night and started pissing into one of those plastic hotel cups that come wrapped in cellophane as it was sitting on the vanity in the hotel room.Proceeded to keep pissing after the glass was full and it ran over all over the desk/vanity, saturating everything on it in piss. I must have seen the mirror on the vanity and assumned that I was in a bathroom with the world's smallest toilet....

woke up in a girl's bed all blurry eyed. Scanned the room to remember the night before. I focused on a chair in the room and saw my wallet.

I was surprised she was in the bed with me because I remember being locked out of her bathroom while she was in there. I rubbed my eyes and focused again on the chair and my wallet. It wasn't my wallet. I had taken a dump in the chair!

pissed away wrote:

woke up in the middle of the night and started pissing into one of those plastic hotel cups that come wrapped in cellophane as it was sitting on the vanity in the hotel room.Proceeded to keep pissing after the glass was full and it ran over all over the desk/vanity, saturating everything on it in piss. I must have seen the mirror on the vanity and assumned that I was in a bathroom with the world's smallest toilet....

Ahh... that reminds me of something I did. Woke up in the middle of the night in my bedroom and pissed on my keyboard.

in the past wrote:

Performed the Eiffel Tower with a buddy on some chick we met that night after a game of truth or dare (she was pretty hot too). We still laugh about it to this day.

what is performing the eiffel tower?

Reading posts like this make me feel better since I have never been THAT bad, although I have made an idiot of myself numerous times.The worst thing that happend to me was I had this huge crush on a girl in college. One night at a party this girl for some reason finally showed interest in me and wanted me to spend the night with her after the party. As this was bigger to me than if I had just been told I had won the lottery the party could not end soon enough!! One of the other girls at the party had never drank before and had 2 wine coolers and said she was drunk and asked my fantasy girl to take care of her.....and I never got the chance. I think that is still the biggest disappointment of my life.---------Another that happened to me. A good friend of mine got drunk every night for 8 days in a row right around New Years one year, and I stayed at his place one of those nights. We went out and he got really drunk. I woke up in the middle of the night hearing water running and see him peeing on the bed I was sleeping on. I yelled "What the f^$# are you doing??" He responds "Taking a piss". I said "Why on my bed???" He then just says "Im drunk" and goes back to bed so I sleep on the floor.The next morning he wakes up and asks why I am on the floor and I told him the story. He was so embarrassed that he wouldn't get out of his bed until I left. This guy also got caught peeing in his mom's dress drawer one night when he was drunk.-------------

and why? wrote:

woke up in a girl's bed all blurry eyed. Scanned the room to remember the night before. I focused on a chair in the room and saw my wallet.

I was surprised she was in the bed with me because I remember being locked out of her bathroom while she was in there. I rubbed my eyes and focused again on the chair and my wallet. It wasn't my wallet. I had taken a dump in the chair!

Voted for George Bush

We had a bash at my apartment with several friends and some acquaintances. It went to the wee hours of the night/morning. I woke up and see a friend pissing on the computer chair of my roommate (whom was out of town that weekend). He later cleaned it up, however, when my roommate got back into town, noticed that it was wet and smelled funny. I had to tell him. The best part of it was the name of guy that peed on the chair is Luke, better known as Lou. From then on it was "Lu is at fault here, man, he peed on your chair." "He peed on my f&%$ing chair." That whole semester was filled with modified Big Lebowski quotes. It was great.

I shit a squirrel!

I was at this party and this chick asked for a ride home. Even though my driver was there, I got the bright idea to drive her home myself, and I drove right off the road and into a pond, flipped the car upside-down underwater.

Well, I swam free, but the girl didn't. Instead of saving her or calling for help, I went back to the party. Me and a couple of buddies went back to try to save her, but we never thought to ask for help from authorities, including a team of professional divers that were available.

After a while of trying to save her, we gave up, and my buddies went back to the party and I went back to my hotel. I swam a 500-foot channel to go back to my hotel because we were on an island and the ferry service was closed. I never called the police or anyone. A fisherman saw the car the next morning and alerted police. The diver that recovered the body said that if he had been called within 5-10 minutes of the accident, she would have likely survived.

That's truly horrible. I sure hope you are writing that from prison. You are surely in financial ruins and a social pariah after that.

excellente choiceo wrote:

That's truly horrible. I sure hope you are writing that from prison. You are surely in financial ruins and a social pariah after that.

Excellent...an ode to Senator Kennedy!

Now you are a senator from MA and just endorsed Obama.

Champ Kind wrote:

excellente choiceo wrote:

That's truly horrible. I sure hope you are writing that from prison. You are surely in financial ruins and a social pariah after that.

Excellent...an ode to Senator Kennedy!

Only in America....sad to say.

When I get really drunk(let's say 6 or 7 funnels in 10 minutes) I turn into my alter ego. He even has a name, Chad Rutherford.

He is the drunken...more confident but also more bitter and angry at the world me. He occasionally he pick up a chick, but only if he is conscious long enough to work his mojo.

Usually, after much swearing and throwing of objects and rambling about races and runners from other schools...he ends up going on an "adventure" in which lord knows what can happen...

but it has ended several times with chad passed out in the sidewalk in front of some townhomes.

The name Chad Rutherford itself was started when "Chad"(not officially named at the time) was getting busted with a few of his friends and officials demanded the names of everyone in the group. In brilliant panic, I came up with the name Chad Rutherford on the spot...thinking I'd dodge the punishment...the offense of lying although ended up putting me in a bit more of a hot seat

The best part about Chad Rutherford is the stories and circumstance he leaves with the real me when I wake up the next morning. I'm always being filled in on funny things and moments Chad had, of which I remember none.

Lastly, I always put "I'm never boozing again" on my away message the day after Rutherford has come out...

I'm usually drunk again within a few days

slept with my girlfriends mom. she was only 37, and hotter than the girlfriend.

I was at a Roots concert and when everyone started throwing plastic bottles and trash at one point so i proceeded to chuck my cell phone into the crowd in all the excitement. I called it and got a very angry irish guy.

Got hammered and passed out on the giant L-Couch in our apartment, a roommate passed on out the other part of the couch. After stealing his blankets away multiple times throughout the night and having him steal them back, I aparently thought it would be a good idea to piss on his face.

He tells me he woke up to me with one leg up on the couch armrest and he jumped out of the way right as I started to piss. I just kept it flowing for a long time.

I woke up in my bed, came out and saw a giant wet spot on the couch and went to his room to ask him if he puked or something. He just rolled over and angrily said "You tried pissing on me!" then rolled back over.

Sorry, Rico

1) Pissed on my Dad in HS

2) Ate food out of the garbage disposal

3) Threw a Christmas tree at a cop (and got away with it)

4) Tried to cook a kitten (sorry kitty)

5) Nudity, lots of nudity. Naked runs.

... too many stories.