Ole Timer wrote:
How do you deal with loser family members that you are only related to by marriage? My brother in law is a lazy bum. He's never held a job more than 2 years, and usually gets fired. This last time, he was fired in July and has been on un-employment since. He only brings home $1200 a month on that, and has a wife and 2 year old baby. The wife is working part time. I don't know how they are making it.
He told me on Thanksgiving that he turned down a $40k/year job because he wanted 10% more than that -- and they wouldn't do it. He also turned down a bank teller job because it would have been "too stressful". This guy has two 2 year degrees, very little skills or experience, but seems to think he is worth $50k a year. He's gotten terribly fat and lazy. His family goes without many things, and they have no health care for themselves or the 2 year old baby.
Today my wife confesses to me that she is thinking about giving them money. Now, we are not rich, but compared to them we are doing quite well. If he hadn't turned down two jobs, I'd be a little more understanding. But turning down a $40k a year job because you think you are worth $4k is asinine.
How the heck do you deal with "in laws" like this that are just not worth the couch space they take up all day? I'd like to pull him aside and read him the riot act, but somehow I don't think it would matter.
If this was my brother in law, no way in hell I'd let my wife give him any of our money. No way. He's flushed every opportunity down the drain, he's going to flush your money down the drain, too. If you give him money, he'll never stop asking for it and when you finally say no, you'll be "the bad guy." Might as well be bad guy now and save some money.