Married guys: how long after the ceremony did it take for your wives to start shutting you off?
Married guys: how long after the ceremony did it take for your wives to start shutting you off?
3 and a half weeks.
About 2 months pre-nuptial.
Welcome to the misery of marriage - we didn't warn you ahead of time, because we like the company.
If you don't have kids and she's already shutting you off, you are in for a long, lonely haul - usually happens after the 2nd kid - women just don't have the need like we do.
You'll have 3 options:
Divorce
Get used to flagging your mule
Get really good at begging her
We had sex during the ceremony, and not since.
Six years and the gate slammed shut. During my routine physical at age 45, the doctor asked me if I had any "erectile dysfunction". I thought to myself, "Hell yeah, I've got a boner you could cut glass with and nowhere to put it, 'cause I'm married".
I actually envy my couch potato peers who need Viagra.
It seems to go in waves...
Every other day for a few weeks, and then nothing for like a month. i don't really complain much about it b/c when she is on, she is on.
Sometimes she just doesn't want it for a while. Weird.
The one thing that stopped completely was the whole lingerie thing. She used to be into it, but now it is sweatpants and my old t-shirts. It is a shame too, b/c she has a nice body.
She had one of those Lingerie showers before our wedding, where all of her friends gave her a different piece as a gift. She wore them on the honeymoon, and I have not seen them since. I really think she left them all there.
We have been married 3 years.
Any suggestions from guys that do not have this problem? Anyone's wife like to wear that stuff anymore?
I've always said to hell with Viagra, what we really need is a men's Anti-Viagra or a women's version of Viagra.
As to the original question, the decline for me actually began after the proposal. It just got more pronounced after marriage, and even more so after a couple kids. Then it stopped altogether, before finally ending in divorce. Women and men are like oil and water. Sure you can put them together, but they'll never truly integrate.
Alex de Large wrote:
I've always said to hell with Viagra, what we really need is a men's Anti-Viagra or a women's version of Viagra.
This may be the truest post on Let's run today.
Another Married Guy wrote:
She had one of those Lingerie showers before our wedding, where all of her friends gave her a different piece as a gift.
Do you think they all modeled the lingerie before giving it to her? Was it a party where they all got drunk wearing the different pieces of lingerie? maybe she should have another one of those parties and invite you. That would spice things up.
What ceremoney?
You asked, "Anyone's wife like to wear that stuff anymore?"
Here's the deal - and I know from a comprehensive study by my buddies and me - only 1 out of 19 women are REALLY into sex, and the whole lingerie, toys, fantasy gig. The other 18 women use sex as a ploy to get you to marry them.
It's the classic "bait and switch" routine - and we've fallen hook, line, and sinker. If I weren't gifted with a vivid imaginaion and soft palms, I'd be either divorced, or paying for professionals.
I'm serious when I say I agree with one of the previous posters, women and men are just too different for anything useful except sex.
Now that I think about it, I guess I have been shut off. Well, I would call it being "phased-out." I don't even remember a shut off time period. We used to have sex quite often. It was kinky as well. Now she tells me I am too big for her. I took it as a compliment but now realize it was just a way for her to get out of it. Thanks for posting this thread. It has helped me to bring clarity to my lack of a sex life. Atleast I have my right hand...
i have been married for 11 years and i find that even when my lady is ready to get it on i'm usually just not that into it. probably once a month we have good sex but the other times we have sex i would honestly rather be punching my own clown and getting it done. for me, the bottom line is that once you have sex with only one person for years and years it loses its luster. i love my wife to death and would consider myself very happy in our relationship but sex just isnt a big part of it anymore.
what i find funny is how a woman gets wildly pissed when she is horny and you tell her no. whe can tell you no thousands of times and its fine but she gets told no once and its a huge issue. chicks are nuts! they are all crazy!
Cameron Frye wrote:
Now she tells me I am too big for her. ...
Ha ha ha ha oh my.. you were doing good till that part. Why lie?
Honestly, reading all of these comments has cheered me up a little today.
pbj and a lonestar for lunch wrote:
the bottom line is that once you have sex with only one person for years and years it loses its luster.
chicks are nuts! they are all crazy!
i wonder how much of it is just a marriage issue. this is one of those dicey topics. no one posting under real screen name (no surprise) and most responses seem genuine.
the difference between the euphoria of a new relationship and long-term reality is pretty big
Does this whole discussion sound like a resounding rebuttal to monogamy, or what?
Just don't ever get married if the relationship that you are in lives and dies by sex. I don't get it very often at all (married 7 years) but luckily my wife is my best friend. The crazy sex runs out at some point for every married couple. You just better have something to fall back on after the sex is gone.
Anonymous unmarried guy wrote:
Does this whole discussion sound like a resounding rebuttal to monogamy, or what?
biggest thing is not to given away the royal jewels early in your relationship. don't be the one compromising all of the time while you are dating. unless you are prepared to accept that once you yield choice you don't get it back.
some people are happy being someone's lap dog the rest of their life. assuming you aren't, think about that in your dating life.
so, continue to go out drinking with your friends and don't always agree to dance with her. sometime you have to (and by virtue of sometimes will want to) make a sacrifice for something that she wants. But if you find this happening a lot, watch out.
same thing with clothes. she doesn't like your old t-shirts and sweatshirts? that's too bad.
and watch out for high maintenance women (or guys if you are female). nothing good can come of that.