College aged daughter dating a guy 9 years older

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That's Great! Thanks for posting!

9 years difference at that point is a big deal. She either needs a father figure as a boyfriend, or he is immature and needs to impress a younger girlfriend with money or something. It is not a totally equal relationship.When you figure that men die sooner than women, she could be setting herself up for 20 years at the end of her life alone.I would be concerned if I were you too.

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

Yes, I too would be concerned but seems you should ask her more about him and get to understand the attraction. He may have a stable life and be a serious kinda guy which may be a welcome relief from frat boys and typical college morons she's dated in the past or something.

When I was in college I constantly heard girls complain how immature boys were. Maybe she's trying to fix that for herself.

Guaranty you that the dude is plowing your daughter. As soon as she starts to age he will get another 21 year old to drill. Nothing you did wrong. Obviously the guy has game picking up a 21 year old at 30

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

Question for you OP:

Would you rather your daughter date a slacker her own age that has no job, no maturity, and no ability to commit?

Older men tend to be better prospects for marriage-aged women.

#FactsOfLife

15 years ago I started dating an 18 year old when I was 27. We've been happily married 10 years with three kids.

Wait.

He is 30 and she is 21?

And you say there is a 9 year difference?

You're an idiot.

Oh, wait. Math is tricky. Sorry. I've made some bad calculations in my life, before.

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

Would I be ok? Physician, clean criminal record, average height, above average looks, solid runner, BMI in normal range.

Is he wealthy and mature? Might be a keeper for her. Would you rather she was dating 21 year old thugs?

Good for him wrote:

15 years ago I started dating an 18 year old when I was 27. We've been happily married 10 years with three kids.

I'm 66, divorced, dating a hot, 56-year-old Brazilian, big-bootied divorcee, down here in Miami, who likes to smoke weed. My parents don't approve, but I see nothing wrong with it.

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

Yeah you're crazy for discriminating against someone just because of their age. As a 43 year old I dated a 19 year old. We've been married 20 years now.

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

What is improper? Old fashioned would be wondering why she isn't already married at 21.

Have you met the guy? Is there something wrong with him or is just his age a problem? Would you rather her date a bonehead 21 y/o frat guy?

A 21-year-old female is probably at about the same maturity level as the average 30-year-old guy. Would you really rather she date the retards who pass for "men" at her university?

I have dated women that were over 25+ years older than me. Is that a problem?

I am a 30 year old dating a 21 year old woman. It is a completely equal relationship.

However, she is foreign, moved to the US for college and completed her undergrad a year ago and has been working since. I don't think I would be nearly as comfortable dating an undergraduate student.

Not a single person among our friends and family has said a word or tried to discourage us in any way. I guess I'm just saying I don't think it's all that weird. It has a lot to do with who she is.

She is an adult. You are her father, not dating her. Who she dates is none of your business. Be thankful you even know about it. I didn't tell my parents anything about most of the people I dated.

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

you did not go wrong It is not an improper relationship and yes you are being old fashioned

I dated a 21 year old when I was 32. Her Mom was 43 and dating a 27 year old.

Moms boytoy was less mature than my GF.

30 yr old guy wrote:

letsdad wrote:

She is 21 and he is THIRTY. What the what! Where did I go wrong.

Not wrong from a legal standpoint but festering in the realm of impropriety, don't you think? Am I being old fashioned?

Would I be ok? Physician, clean criminal record, average height, above average looks, solid runner, BMI in normal range.

What are your 5K times?