I'm far from an expert, but my parents moved to Blanchard (safe and boring, don't live there) a few years back.
Although I couldn't ever have imagined living in Oklahoma, since visiting, I've warmed to the idea that, getting the right University job (in my case) wouldn't totally suck.
I've jogged and road biked on country roads, which can be OK in sparse traffic, but otherwise not ideal, with rough shoulders, drivers not used to runners, and unchained dogs. Local knowledge seems to help there.
Done a race in Edmond (Frosty Five in Feb), good race and good group. The OKC Marathon is very well done, as is the OKC turkey trot. The latter two go around Lake Hefner, which seems like a good place for regular running in OKC.
Otherwise, Norman is definitely the place to be, culture-wise/food-wise and politically. I've ridden with the Canadian River Cycling/Racing Club -- you didn't ask about that, but the point is that they meet in Norman, and parts of their routes might be good long-run routes, since they survive the Oklahoma roads in spandex. You wouldn't be an outlier there, especially with a wife and kids. If you have a steady job and education, I'd look in Norman for sure. The other places to get a nice house seem to be creepy master-planned developments around the city with zero character, and while there seems to be a small contingent of condos in OKC, it doesn't seem to be at critical mass to be worth living down there, IMHO.
Visiting Tulsa doesn't suck, it's somewhat liberal and has some trails (Turkey Mountain) worth visiting. I haven't been to Stillwater.
Lastly, go for a long run and then gorge at Ted's Cafe Escondido for Mexican food. Good luck!