Portly nerds from across the country flocked to Richmond, Virginia today to take part in one of the biggest live action role playing events in the world. Dressed in military garb and carrying weapons that could blow a hole through the side of a hippopotamus, jovial, maladjusted young boys with few romantic prospects eagerly took part in a rousing game of "army man." Complete with ice cream trucks and bouncy castles, a fun time was had by all.
According to Titus McGivens from Bumfug, Mississippi, "This event was about two things: protecting the second amendment and collectively immersing ourselves in an imaginary setting and using collaboration and improvisation to defeat the Bad Guys."
"They can try to stop me from buying seven handguns at a time, but let's see how they respond when I conjure a plasma grenade attack," added a man who called himself Jim Beam. Beam then went running off into the crowd mimicking elaborate karate moves and making explosive sound effects.
The 10,000 Army Man Strong LARP event was organized by 11 year old Jimmy Pembleton, a Richmond native. "I think guns are really, um, cool and, like, it's fun to play pretend but nobody likes to do stuff outside anymore," said Pembleton. "I thought if I could organize some people on Facebook to come play with me, maybe more people from my school would want to be my friend and do the stuff I like."
Reporting from Virgina, I'm Dick Bender.