It does sound like a lot of micro managing. I do wonder, how much is your daughter responsible for around the house? For example, does she clean the bathroom, cook dinner a few times a night, take the garbage out, do yard work, laundry, shovel snow etc? Looking back, these tasks outside of school gave me personally a lot of self esteem during this phase in my life (which as others have said is a very difficult time), and it gave me a place to be in charge of something, and be responsible for. My parents gave me a lot of chores, but it was not like you get $20, I never got money for doing chores, it was "this is life", and we all have to do chores, here are yours, these are mine, etc. We are equal. And that approach gave me a good work ethic and made me feel empowered. I don't think it was on purpose, but I do think back to my friends who had parents that did everything for them, in high school, and their transition to college was much rougher than mine, they were much less self motivated than me, and their general confidence in practical matters was much lower than mine. I know it seems like a tangent, but even if it seems impractical to give your daughter control of her school work, make sure she has a lot of responsibilities to manage out of school, and you treat her more like an equal. If you are treating her like a child and giving her no opportunity to develop self motivation, she never will. Yes she is lazy, but you let her get away with being lazy, by doing stuff she should be responsible for.