My wife and I started with nothing and we still have most of it.
My wife and I started with nothing and we still have most of it.
not alwaysssss wrote:
I've dated 4 women in a row who got screwed in their divorce.
So, it doesn't always happen the way you think.
So they only got 80%?
This ^ wrote:
SDSU Aztec wrote:
My understanding is that although custody disputes can become pretty nasty, financial settlements are formula driven and are usually resolved prior to going to trial.
This is generally true.
And the notion that women get everything and men get screwed over is patently false. Only the truly ignorant believe such nonsense.
+1
Clayton99 wrote:
The house, the money, the kids, even the damn dog.
The amount of power that women have for doing nothing seriously grinds my gears. Never getting married crew here.
Why would you marry a woman that will do nothing in your relationship? The joke's on you and you deserve to get screwed.
Married 20 years. Happily so, but if things went south and I were to divorce my husband, it'd go 50/50: we both supported each other through our respective grad school and careers and contributed equally to the life we made together. It's what happens when you marry your equal. It's a partnership. You should explore that as a concept.
not alwaysssss wrote:
I've dated 4 women in a row who got screwed in their divorce.
And if you talk to the 4 ex-husbands, they'll say the opposite.
The only winners in a divorce are the lawyers. Fact.
What was it like... to have someone support you throughout difficult times? I'm curious and you've irritated my complacency.
Oh pleease wrote:
Married 20 years. Happily so, but if things went south and I were to divorce my husband, it'd go 50/50: we both supported each other through our respective grad school and careers and contributed equally to the life we made together. It's what happens when you marry your equal. It's a partnership. You should explore that as a concept.
This used to be me until several years ago. Spouse and I were very equal in education, jobs, pay, household duties and child-rearing. But then as the kids were all going off to college, she had a mid-life crisis and made catastrophic choices that ruined our marriage. Now the person with whom I shared the best years of my life is my bitter enemy and nothing is going 50/50. Divorce is awful and ugly.
I hope you have many happy years together with your spouse. It's a beautiful thing to go through all the stages of life together. And the most romantic thing in life is to make love to the mother of your kids.
SDSU Aztec wrote:
In some cases it's fair. A woman might forego a career to stay home to raise the children so the husband can focus on his career. When he dumps her to marry a 20-year old receptionist, it's reasonable for her to receive half of the assets, child support and alimony.
In my case, my ex-wife didn't do much besides spend my money so paying her alimony really sucked.
Alimony! Did you spend the money to hire a good attorney? I am surprised you use the word fair since you pay alimony. Wow!
used to be me wrote:
Oh pleease wrote:
Married 20 years. Happily so, but if things went south and I were to divorce my husband, it'd go 50/50: we both supported each other through our respective grad school and careers and contributed equally to the life we made together. It's what happens when you marry your equal. It's a partnership. You should explore that as a concept.
This used to be me until several years ago. Spouse and I were very equal in education, jobs, pay, household duties and child-rearing. But then as the kids were all going off to college, she had a mid-life crisis and made catastrophic choices that ruined our marriage. Now the person with whom I shared the best years of my life is my bitter enemy and nothing is going 50/50. Divorce is awful and ugly.
I hope you have many happy years together with your spouse. It's a beautiful thing to go through all the stages of life together. And the most romantic thing in life is to make love to the mother of your kids.
You sound like a really good guy. I'm very sorry this is happening to you. The fact that you can say what you did in your second paragraph despite the horrific upheaval in your life says a lot about your character: many would have turned to bitter misogyny in your place. I wish you well.
Did you hire a good attorney? wrote:
SDSU Aztec wrote:
In some cases it's fair. A woman might forego a career to stay home to raise the children so the husband can focus on his career. When he dumps her to marry a 20-year old receptionist, it's reasonable for her to receive half of the assets, child support and alimony.
In my case, my ex-wife didn't do much besides spend my money so paying her alimony really sucked.
Alimony! Did you spend the money to hire a good attorney? I am surprised you use the word fair since you pay alimony. Wow!
I didn't say it was fair in my case. I did get advice from an attorney and he said that in California, the wife gets 40% of the difference in incomes for half of the length of the marriage and 50% of the assets. The house had negative equity and she had burned through my savings so she just took her car and I had to deal with the house. She had only worked sporadically so the alimony was significant.
The only people who win in a divorce are the lawyers
