Anyone else feel like they screw up everything they touch?

Have you considered doing the opposite of everything your instinct tells you to do?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY

Well, the first thing I would do is fork out the $$ and get some neuropsychological testing so you can pinpoint your specific deficits and get a treatment plan together.

Your inability to relate to others falls along the autism/Asperger's spectrum (in my opinion). Honestly, a social skills class would teach you how to pick up social cues that you are missing and help you relate better to others. There are lots of the out there for children but I am sure there some available for adults.

All is not lost.

Thanks,

I actually just put in an order for the book you suggested and another one listed further down.

I do feel like I do connect and read people well and that is a strength except that it made me excellent at interviews but then I let people down when I was not as competent as they thought I was going to be. When people have high hopes for you and you do not live up to them they tend to be more disappointed in you than the other employees that they did not have as of high expectations.

My experiences have made me develop an acute painful self awareness. Any failure over shadows anything I do well.

To be clear, I can interact in a superficial way, say hello and whatnot. But if the conversation goes beyond surface level, I 'm lost. And I know I'm going to fail the person anyway, so what's the point?

Just for info wrote:

Get a book called something like "The New Discover Your Strengths"

Good luck!

Strengthfinder 2.0 was a great book and test. It really help me (I'm in a similar position) to understand what my strengths are and gave me insight into why I didn't perform well in certain areas. For instance, I'm strategic, like to come up with ways to "kill two birds with one stone". I'm also analytical.

In jobs I got fired from were all very task, very detail oriented, with tight deadlines making analysis impossible and my bosses were all task oriented people, hence they were promoted. So they couldn't understand my why of thinking. For example, I forgot to change a date on a worksheet. My manager wouldn't approve it until I changed it, thus holding up the whole corporation up over something that didn't matter. But that's how task oriented people are.

I decided right then and there that I would never work for anyone that is proud of being extremely detailed or perfect (because perfect is BS, it just means they blame others).

Now finding your strengths and getting to jobs that fit them is two different things. Good luck.

I've also gotten the advice that you should:

Find a job, in which the bar is so low, that you look like a superstar, then you will develop a reputation of being tops. Such as government work. Most individuals in government work, don't care, and are just slogging away. If you show a little ambition, you immediately become a rising star, you may have to take a pay cut but in the long run, you will be better off and be promoted getting your career back on track.

Just a thought.

"Most individuals in government work, don't care, and are just slogging away. If you show a little ambition, you immediately become a rising star, you may have to take a pay cut but in the long run, you will be better off and be promoted getting your career back on track."

This should be funny, what kind of government work do you imagine he could get hired to do?

just another guy wrote:

Living screwed up lives is what brought us all here. Welcome to your new family.

This.

Bump

Bump

I HAVE BEEN MADE REDUNDANT FROM 3 JOBS IN 10 YEARS, RECENTLY I STEPPED DOWN FROM A FULL TIME JOB TO GO CASUAL. IM 71 NOW, AND IT SEAMS EVERTHING I DO I STUFF IT UP .Today i took my grandson to the skate park and hit a post smashing my car. Im a complete stuff up.Is it bad luck or is it jusy me.

Googled this for myself and found this thread. What you said about interviewing resonated with me.

Am a screwdriver, can’t be worse.

I suspect you need Jocko in your life (as we all do)

discipline.

get his book, “discipline equals freedom” and listen to all of his podcasts.

You have all you need already. just move in the right direction. Jocko will set you on the right path.

I am 100% stone cold serious.

ralphie wrote:

I feel like everything I touch goes to crap.

Stop touching stuff?

This thread is 6 years old. Brojos, this is what LetsRun used to be. This guy came to LetsRun and, along with the usual snark, he got multiple replies with some pretty good advice.

Threads like this one are one reason I stay here. There are a LOT of smart people here, but increasingly they are driven away by trolls. There used to be a lot of pros here... heck, Jack Daniels used to post here... but they have been driven away by mean-spirited personal attacks.

I would like to be able to recommend this forum to other runners, but I can't. It's just not civil enough.

ralphie wrote:

To be clear, I can interact in a superficial way, say hello and whatnot. But if the conversation goes beyond surface level, I 'm lost. And I know I'm going to fail the person anyway, so what's the point?

This is classic Asperger's, and I should know. I've lost jobs for the same reason. I say what I think is uncontroversial and obvious, and then everyone hates me. I think it's more common than you read about. It's a disability, but you can live with it. When they give you a task, you perform well. A job like that - independent, goal oriented, limited interactions - would be ideal.

The letsrun hive mind probably thinks it's a made-up disease, but it sounds to me like you could be describing ADHD. Was diagnosed at 28, really turned my life around.

No pity parties here, ever. I just grouse about not doing some things excellently. Plenty of talents but not where I wanted them! 😞 like running--sob!