New Dad here--how do I get my kids to become (great) runners?

While I didn't fully recognize it as a kid, my dad never gave me the love I required. As a result, I've spent my life [subconsciously, at least] working my ass off to try and earn his respect and love, but nothing's ever been good enough - good at running, excelled in high school and college, got into a great medical school, etc. And, of course, his lack of love is the direct result of his 'love' issues with his own parents growing up... the cycle continues.

So you could try this approach. Never give them the love they require, even when they start running. They'll always be motivated to get better!

Dont push them into the sport. Sure you can expose them to it, but for god's sake don't push.

1. a half @ssed effort means nothing

2. if they know that YOU love running, what is the first thing they can reject if they get in a rebellious mood? you got it- running. If they know their quitting the team hurts YOU more than it does THEM, you've failed.

If your kids prefer swimming, encourage it. If your kids prefer soccer, embrace it. It is far more important that they do what pleases THEM.

old dad wrote:

One of my sons was a very good high school and college runner, the other was a pretty good high school and college runner. I was a mediocre college runner and a pretty good masters runner. We let the kids to just about every kind of sports camp when they were young. They did swimming, soccer, tennis, basketball, volleyball, surfing and a couple of other things. I let them run with me when they wanted to run with me. They ended up gravitating to running on their own, and their competitiveness was internally generated, not the result of my or my wife's pushing them.

The best way is to give them lots of opportunities and let them make their own choices

Great response!

SUP BRO FEELS FOR YOUR KIDS. IT SADDENS SUP BRO THAT A FATHER DESIRES FOR HIS KIDS TO FOLLOW IN HIS FOOTSTEPS WITH EFFEMINATE FEATURES, BIRD LEGS, SUNKEN CHESTS, AND HIGH-PITCHED GIRLY VOICES. DO YOU THINK THESE ARE THE QUALITIES THAT GET YOU ALL-COUNTY WITH 14 TACKLES FOR A LOSS? FORGET ABOUT IT! ON TOP OF THAT, DO YOU THINK THIS LIFESTYLE WILL GET YOUR SONS LAID? NO CHANCE!

YOU NEED TO START ENFORCING A HEALTHY REGIMEN OF ALPHA MALE STIMULUS TO THESE YOUNG BROS. SUP BRO RECOMMENDS STARTING YOUR KIDS IMMEDIATELY ON WHEY PROTEIN SHAKES EACH MORNING WITH MANDATORY WEIGHT TRAINING. BUY THEM ED HARDY AND TAPOUT CLOTHING INSTEAD OF URBAN OUTFITTER PU$$Y WEAR AND ENCOURAGE THE HEAVY USE OF TAG BODY SPRAY. PUNISH THEM FOR LISTENING TO THE FRAY AND PLAY HEADSTRONG BY TRAPT WHILE THEY PUMP UP. THEY WILL BE ALPHA IN NO TIME WITH THE ATTITUDE OF A CHAMPION.

ANYWAY, TIME FOR SUP BRO TO GET BACK TO COOKING HIS CHICKEN BREASTS. GOTTA KEEP SWOLL FOR THE BIG WEEKEND.

Your kids' genes determine whether they will be great runners, not early training. Regardless, pushing your kids into running is SO wrong.

Sir Octane wrote:

I was wondering from all of you--

What drove you to run?

What drove you to NOT run at an early age?

How can I get my boys to run?

How can I get my boys to not hate running (because dad likes it)?

Thanks,

St(oo)pid new dad

Some good answers out there. For me, I tried track in middle school along with other sports and it was just a check off list. I remember I gave it my best or tried too hard and maybe burned out. Who knows but I always incorporated some form of running throughout whether it be prior to tennis practice in HS/college or just for fitness reasons. It wasn't until later in life that I found the true meaning of "running' and have not looked back since...

Now, I have two daughters one in middle school and one soon to be in HS. I always kept my kids somewhat active (although, not like when I was a kid where I did multiple sports) but instead have them at least choose one "physical activity"--didn't matter whether they were good or not, I wanted them to at least try it and stick with it until the season/segment part of the lessons were done (don't like to waste money!). Since toddlers they have tried swimming, dance, gymnastics and tennis lessons. I would also encourage them to enter the "fun run" kid's one mile. No pressure--just have them try it. Youngest loved it and has did it every year and oldest tried it once or twice.

My oldest felt like she wasn't as "athletic" as the younger one but would feel frustrated that she wasn't good enough. I always told her, I was just proud that she would give her efforts and never gave up. To make a long story short...

Oldest has completed her first year of track (it was on her will that she wanted to join) and by end of the season, she has made close friends from the team and has improved tremendously....and wants to join the CC/track next year when she goes off to HS. I have never put pressure on the kids and still don't or won't. I want them to enjoy the journey and when the time comes they don't like it anymore, I will still support/be there for them no matter what.

Sir Octane wrote:

I was wondering from all of you--

What drove you to run?

What drove you to NOT run at an early age?

How can I get my boys to run?

How can I get my boys to not hate running (because dad likes it)?

Thanks,

St(oo)pid new dad

Hey, you can get the boys to run (is this Loxton/Aksel, we're talking about?) fairly easily, it's running competitively and doing the work that has to come from them.

Well the best way would be to w hore your wife out to some Kenyans and wait 9 mo.

So well played that I'm thinking of actually using this plan instead of my usual, "you're not fast enough Pre, you'll never amount to anything Pre..."

What is this crazy talk about not telling your kids what you did as a runner or athlete? My kids know that I was a runner, swimmer, tennis player, Pop Warner Football, baseball blah, blah, blah when I was younger.

I also tell them that their Mom was very smart (which made up for her appalling lack of leg speed velocity as a runner). I tell them this because we have an expectation that they will strive to be athletic and educated. I also tell them what we did to let them know that it is all well within their abilities to achieve.

I can't say that I want them to be runners though. It worked out very well for me but that is because I was raised old school - without parental love and attention. Who knows what will motivate our little monsters what with all the love and support we heap upon their sorry little asses.

I raised 2 kids, one with no interest in athletics at all and the other one a star high school distance runner. I will agree the comments of the other parents about exposing your kids to lots of things and seeing where their interests lie. Please do not force them to run or start them on these junior olympic teams at age six or whatever. Let them play and have fun.

However, I will say that, in my opinion, it is not wrong to exercise some firmness as a parent. My kid who turned out to be the good runner liked youth soccer as a young kid. I wouldn't say he was crazy about it and he was not a star, but he liked it. But our small school district did not have any soccer program, and he eventually outgrew the youth program. He then became a couch potato. I pushed him into doing some sort of school sport to stay active, and the choices were running or football. He was actually pretty mad at me but chose running. My goal was not for him to be a star - he did that on his own. But he never would have tried it without an initial push.

I will mention something no one else seems to have brought up. As a baby and a young child, your child is totally dependent on you for their diet. Give them healthy food. Do not take them to fast food places. Do not let them become obese. Avoid video games. Let them learn some real skills like learning a musical instrument. Take them hiking and talk to them about the outdoors. Get them to love nature. I think all those things contributed to my kid liking running and being outside. None of these things will guarantee that your kid will be a star runner, but if they are an overweight fast food addict addicted to TV and video games, it is certainly unlikely that they will achieve whatever potential they might have.

Good luck to you.

Just have them run at least 8km to school everyday. That's what the greats all did

Start with swimming

My son is in 8th grade. He is expected to do at least one active sport, and it just so happens he has chosen running since I do it.

To keep his motivation this past winter, I bribed him with a trip to New Orleans to race the half marathon there if he ran all winter. It worked, and he is having a good track season.

oh please wrote:

To keep his motivation this past winter, I bribed him with a trip to New Orleans to race the half marathon there if he ran all winter. It worked, and he is having a good track season.

I've bribed my youngest kid if she can beat my 5k time someday (don't worry, it's not too fast..), I would give her 100 bucks. Oh boy...what did I get myself into???

Little Boy Blue wrote:

While I didn't fully recognize it as a kid, my dad never gave me the love I required. As a result, I've spent my life [subconsciously, at least] working my ass off to try and earn his respect and love, but nothing's ever been good enough - good at running, excelled in high school and college, got into a great medical school, etc. And, of course, his lack of love is the direct result of his 'love' issues with his own parents growing up... the cycle continues.

So you could try this approach. Never give them the love they require, even when they start running. They'll always be motivated to get better!

I think that this is a reasonable response, although it's probably not a great way to develop happy kids.

YOur a new dad and this is your concern? YOu can't make your child a great runner any more than you can get your child too, "not hate running,"

Is this your overridding concern? Why not let your child chose his own interests, sports, and passions?

Why not be concerned with giving your child the gift of love, a great childhood, acceptance, discipline, and nuturing. So they can make their own path.

I am not sure I agree with other posters on this. I’ve got two high school age sons and I “pushed” both of them to try running track in middle school. Son #1 wasn’t very good and hated it, has reverted to other activities, but runs 3-4 days a week on his own without me pushing him at all. I think he will be someone who always runs to stay in shape. Son #2 liked soccer far better, but is clearly more talented at running (broke 5 minute mile in 8th grade). I don’t think he would have gone out for track if I didn’t press him to do it, and it is two years later now and he is clearly on his way to be a solid high school runner. I think he is good enough to run at college if he chooses it.

Neither of these kids would have even tried this sport if I didn’t push a bit. I didn’t bring them to it kicking and screaming, but I did push a bit when they were middle schoolers.

And, it isn’t just running. I pressed them to try musical instruments as well. Son #1 took to it and can play 4 instruments now. Son #2 didn’t and quit in a year. But, son #1 wouldn’t have pursued it without Dad pretty much forcing the issue.

Pushing your kids isn’t child abuse, it is called parenting. Clearly, you can press too far… but I’ve always thought I need to push them through a few doors to get them started with things. Granted, there are many parents who push too far, but there are just as many who push too little.

Just chase your child in the car until they can run no further. Do this daily and they will become fairly quick.