Your goal of "saving face" is exactly wrong. Seeing a man take a risk and be assertive to approach her is the biggest turn on for a woman. And yes, taking a risk means that sometimes (often) you will flame out.
Definitely read _No More Mister Nice Guy_.
She fine?
txRUNNERgirl wrote:
http://www.theonion.com/video/americas-waitresses-are-they-hitting-on-you,20493/
haha that was funny. Reminds me of some cops I know.
listen charlie, you just need to D.E.N.N.I.S. her
luv2run wrote:
Also, for a first date, do something that you can end quickly if it starts to spiral downward. Drinks or coffee are good. If it goes well you can maybe transition right into dinner. If not, you say you made other plans and then bail.
In your case, you then need to find a new coffee shop. Is it worth it?
hmm... ask a starbucks barista out for a coffee- there's a great idea!
webfoot wrote:
Your takeaway from this experience:
1) Buying expensive coffee at starbucks is not flagpole-approved
That is true most of the time. I am reasonable though, so if you are debt free, own your home outright, and have at least a million dollars in retirement (or some combination of your own savings plus a pension that would be the equivalent of having a million dollars), then if you want to get some coffee at Starbucks, have at it.
My pastor went to TCU in his undergrad. He married the barista at the local starbucks. This is how he did it. Went in 4 days a week at the same time on the same days. He sat the same table and studied. After about 2 months he finally nuted up and asked her out. He said he was scared. I still give him a hard time about it.
I assked her if he was a weirdo or if you actually like him at the time. She said that he was the "hot" guy that came into starbucks and all of the other girls were pissed when he didn't ask them out. She said he never said much to her. Just "Hey,how are you" after awhile he got her name... Then after about a month he held a good convo with her.. Now this is a very expensive way to ask out a chick. 4 bucks a day for 4 days a week. This chick better be smokin hot. I'll put 20 bucks down that she is crazy like all of the other chicks.
montana wrote:
same thing happened to Theo Huxtable when his dad (cliff) grounded him for having bad grades which prevented him from going out with this one chick who met and was eventually married durting Theo's period of groundation. we find out years later that Theo had dislexia and the grounds for the punishment were unfounded (at least with hindsight).
Best.
I love when people call these underpaid fast wood workers 'baristas'.
Please
Jhbubugvygvyg wrote:
I love when people call these underpaid fast wood workers 'baristas'.
Please
Well, not all "fast food" workers are baristas, but someone at Starbucks is. A barista is simply a person who makes and serves coffee to the public. It's not a big title or anything. Not sure why this bothers you. Someone who serves coffee, ESPECIALLY at a place that specializes in coffee is a barista. Why so down on a word my brother?
simplekindofman wrote:
go in there every day
order the same thing
act non chalant so she doesn't think you're weird
after a while she might say something like, you want the usual? or somtething like that idk
ask her name
leave
talk to her the next day for a little
ask her out the day after that
As someone who has accomplished this very feat I would say something not far from the above works. Although in my case it's not like I decided day one that I wanted anything out of it... went in there every day for a while (used to study in there) and eventually more chat started. After a while everyone in there knew me by name and invited me on a night out with them. The flirtation was pretty obvious by the end so was no surprise when finally something happened.
It was fairly brief, turned out to have next to nothing in common... but just wanted to keep the dream alive. It can be done.
1). Start going in on a regular basis to the point that she at least recognizes your face.
2). Once you are fairly confident she recognizes you, start making friendly small talk.
3). During one of these friendly exchanges, when the time feels right, go for it. Ask her out. JUST DO IT.
Just make sure you don't wait too long to carry out the above steps. This shouldn't be drawn out for months. Women like confidence, so don't dilly dally. At the same time though, it would probably be best to wait it out for a few visits so you aren't some completely random dude. Your chances of success probably increase with time, but at some point you'll surpass that time limit, if that makes sense. Either way, you need to do this man. She might shoot you down, but that's fine. You have to take risks dude. Otherwise you'll have to live with the regret that you never even tried.
If you actually want to take this matter seriously, I think you need a better plan...
I suggest the following:
Plan A: The Life Stinks Plan.
Pretend to be a millionaire pretending to be homeless. While pretending to be homeless, she will start to pity you(which is probably a pretty good start for you). Keep up this act for a week or so, and then stage an elaborate outing of your "secret" in which you save a child from getting run over by a car and somehow spill hot coffee all over the barista. Then after your showing of heroics, apologize, buy her a coffee and tell her that you are a millionaire pretending to be homeless to win a bet with your millionaire friends. If you buy her a coffee at starbucks it will even validate your story since you can "afford" starbucks and thus must be a millionaire as per flagpole. After the secret is out of the bag, you will be both a hero and rich in her eyes. If everything goes to plan up to this point, I think it will be pretty hard to blow it from here.
Good luck. Let me know how it goes. If this doesn't work, there's always plan B...
"If you buy her a coffee at starbucks it will even validate your story since you can "afford" starbucks and thus must be a millionaire as per flagpole."
Ha. Laughed out loud there.
i kinda like running wrote:
1). Start going in on a regular basis to the point that she at least recognizes your face.
2). Once you are fairly confident she recognizes you, start making friendly small talk.
3). During one of these friendly exchanges, when the time feels right, go for it. Ask her out. JUST DO IT.
Just make sure you don't wait too long to carry out the above steps. This shouldn't be drawn out for months. Women like confidence, so don't dilly dally. At the same time though, it would probably be best to wait it out for a few visits so you aren't some completely random dude. Your chances of success probably increase with time, but at some point you'll surpass that time limit, if that makes sense. Either way, you need to do this man. She might shoot you down, but that's fine. You have to take risks dude. Otherwise you'll have to live with the regret that you never even tried.
I 100% agree with this idea. I've worked at a coffee shopped and also waitressed at numerous places. I've had customers I thought were attractive before and some have made it obvious they werent interested while others did not. I would say 9/10 times they were not creepy. Not all girls are that paranoid and if she reacts that way, you did not lose by trying. You could always ask if she gets a lunch break and wants to grab a sandwhich down the street or something. That way, she can walk someplace casually with you and it helps break the ice. You might get a second real date out of it.
You should just get her name smile and be friendly for the next couple weeks. Then on a night she goes out with her friends follow her to whatever bar she goes to and run into her and say “hey don’t you work at Starbucks”. The rest is up to you, you will find out if she interested pretty quickly by her actions.
or just bet a dog for emotional needs and hire a high class whore for sexual needs it is a lot cheaper in the long run
Neliah2507 wrote:
You could always ask if she gets a lunch break and wants to grab a sandwhich down the street or something.
Better yet, ask her to make you the sandwich.
Ask her for a venti 1 pump caramel, 1 pump white mocha, 2 scoops vanilla bean powder, extra ice frappuchino with 2 shots poured over the top (apagotto style) with caramel drizzle under and on top of the whipped cream, double cupped and a flash of her tits.