How to deal with life not turning out how you expected?

midlife crisis guy wrote:

So how do I face the rest of my life knowing we may not ever have things be materially as good as they once were?

You can shut up whining about materialism for a start.

does not sound appealing wrote:

upper management dude wrote:

Gotta say it felt good to read the original post . I kept my focus on my job and at age 50 I’m living good . McMansion a couple expensive autos , in the business world there are winners and losers . But look on the sunny side: A. You aren’t Jamin, B. You aren’t Greg , C. You aren’t a. brojo , so it’s not a total loss.

“McMansion a couple expensive autos“ ... you are 50 and have this AND still think it’s something special? What a shallow and meaningless life you must lead.

Upper management dudes are usually shallow and meaningless.

fly on the wall 2 wrote:

If you could be a fly on the wall of the homes of that old affluent neighborhood in which you used to live, you'd discover that many of those houses are full of things but empty of love. The family members tolerate each other, and don't thrive on each other. Life is too short to live that way..

Amazing post. The whole thing was great but I just highlighted my favorite. Man, we need an upvote on here.

upper management dude wrote:

Gotta say it felt good to read the original post . I kept my focus on my job and at age 50 I’m living good . McMansion a couple expensive autos , in the business world there are winners and losers . But look on the sunny side: A. You aren’t Jamin, B. You aren’t Greg , C. You aren’t a. brojo , so it’s not a total loss.

Happy I could provide you some schadenfreude. We had the McMansion and expensive autos in our 30s, but had to downsize those things due to our circumstances. We were probably unwise to extend ourselves so much that young, but the optimism and vigor of youth can blind your judgement sometimes. I don’t consider us losers though. We learned hard lessons and will probably live very financially conservatively for the rest of our lives. We still intend to work hard and be as successful as possible.

Believe in the Power of Prayer!

M.A.G.A.

KAG

"Four more years!"

The Trump Family Dynasty is a Mandate From Heaven!

The only reason to look in your neighbor’s bowl is to make sure he has enough.

Know thyself. You must decide what YOU really want. It is ok to really want a BMW and a big house. But only chase after them if YOU really want them. It seems YOU and spouse really wanted kids. You sacrificed and you got them—congratulations. Enjoy the deep and abiding satisfaction that you achieved your goal and enjoy the heck out of those kids and raise them right. Bask in their love every day and love them in return.

Also beware that many people who say “money isn’t everything” never had any money to speak of, and say things like that as a coping mechanism to avoid confronting their own failure. I only respect “money isn’t everything” folks who made big money and then gave it away to live a more spartan life. Anything else is just sour grapes.

I grew up poor and am now a multimillionaire, and being rich is awesome. BUT I try not to compare myself to others who are even more financially successful—that way lies madness, or at least frustration. Enjoy wealth where it allows you to do what YOU want. Beyond that point is where it “doesn’t mean everything.”

Just be thankful for what you have achieved, and if YOU want MORE, then go after it, relentlessly. If you fail, look in the mirror and accept it, and don’t say you didn’t want it.

I'm shocked that no one has mentioned prayer

rojo wrote:

fly on the wall 2 wrote:

If you could be a fly on the wall of the homes of that old affluent neighborhood in which you used to live, you'd discover that many of those houses are full of things but empty of love. The family members tolerate each other, and don't thrive on each other. Life is too short to live that way..

Amazing post. The whole thing was great but I just highlighted my favorite. Man, we need an upvote on here.

I do have to admit that most people I meet in our new truly middle class neighborhood are very nice people and I’d say a higher percentage are happier, friendlier, and less neurotic than those from our wealthier neighborhood. I try to learn from them what I can. I’ve always been ambitious and competitive; never satisfied. It’s not so much that I want to be rich, I just want to keep moving up, being better than I was yesterday, chasing bigger goals. Sometimes I look around me at these guys who have the same job for 20 years, live in the same house their whole lives, and don’t really travel, and I wonder their secret to not feel crazy like I would in this situation. I am envious of their ability to live simple lives with joy.

allman brothers wrote:

I read that Jon Bon Jovi is worth 500million.....but his daughter was addicted to drugs or at least OD'ed and used. Apparently he and his wife are good people , a good family. My point is , I would rather have a healthy kid then 500 million dollars.

Does the order really matter? Having 500 million dollars then a healthy kid would be great too.

next door neighbor wrote:

This is what they call first world problems. The grass looks greener, but rarely is if you know the whole story. Everyone has problems. You won’t see those posted on social though.

YES. I have a good friend who appears to have the perfect life on social media....only to find out she is depressed to the point of being suicidal. People have become experts at being inauthentic online.