Married guys, help me out!

You're thinking about this the wrong way.

What your wife or GF will look like in 30 years is irrelevant, because within 3 years of marrying her the greatest sexual struggle is to shut out other women. This is regardless of what she looks like, whether a 10/10 or a 1/10.

You have no idea wrote:

You're thinking about this the wrong way.

What your wife or GF will look like in 30 years is irrelevant, because within 3 years of marrying her the greatest sexual struggle is to shut out other women. This is regardless of what she looks like, whether a 10/10 or a 1/10.

Actually, you're thinking of it the wrong way.

If she is not putting out in three years you have every right to have other women meet your needs. If she is still meeting your needs then you have nothing to complain about, whether she is a 10/10 or a 1/10.

idea wrote:

You have no idea wrote:

You're thinking about this the wrong way.

What your wife or GF will look like in 30 years is irrelevant, because within 3 years of marrying her the greatest sexual struggle is to shut out other women. This is regardless of what she looks like, whether a 10/10 or a 1/10.

Actually, you're thinking of it the wrong way.

If she is not putting out in three years you have every right to have other women meet your needs. If she is still meeting your needs then you have nothing to complain about, whether she is a 10/10 or a 1/10.

You're trying but you still don't know.

It's not that she stops putting out necessarily, or that guys start complaining. It has nothing to do with how much you love her, or how often you have sex. Guys are just wired to diversify and procreate as much as they can. That is the core challenge of marriage, to suppress that primitive wiring.

I'd say there's less correlation between what she will look like and more along the lines of what she will be like tempermentally.

----Do you LIKE the mother of the woman you intend to marry, your future mother-in-law, or is she a gigantic pain in the ass?-----

That is the real question to ask yourself.

Being overweight is not a genetic condition...so you can help your wife to stay slim and attractive to the extent that she is so already

Instead of turning out like her mother, which would have been fine, she turned out like her grandmother on her father's side! A real "I've fallen and can't reach my beer" grandmother.

Don't marry until divorce laws are changed in this country. You will be miserable until it ends badly for you.

You'll probably divorce within 10 years so who cares what she will look like in 30 years.

My wife is, essentially, my mother in law. Looks, personality, the way she dresses, attitude. I'm probably fortunate in this regard but I'm thankful for it.

my wife is absolutely nothing like her mother. Complete mismatch. Which has worked out for me.

You have no idea wrote:

Guys are just wired to diversify and procreate as much as they can. That is the core challenge of marriage, to suppress that primitive wiring.

Just because most women carefully manage their dalliances doesn't mean they are more monogamous.

It should be obvious "diversifying" isn't good if it's cheating/dishonest/betrays trust regardless of gender.

Mine looks just like her mom after 20 years and it's terrible. It's like she fell into her mom's habits of overeating and inactivity and it sucks to see it. I love her and will not leave but I miss my hot wife.

Needs to know wrote:

She's a great lady, kind-hearted and all, but she must weigh 300 lbs and has issues with high BP, diabetes, etc. She can barely walk and her house is a perpetual mess.

Is this what I'm setting myself up for?

YES

Does she talk intelligently about the steps she's trying to put in place to deal with her diabetes?

Or does she say, "I got the diabeetus" ?

Needs to know wrote:

We've all heard about looking at your girlfriend's mother to see what your GF will look like in 30 years. Is that true? Can anyone give any stories about women you married who either (luckily or unluckily) turned out to look like their mothers? My GF and I have been together 4 years. We are both in our late 20's. I'm thinking of giving her a ring but images of her mom keep coming to mind and it's not pretty. She's a great lady, kind-hearted and all, but she must weigh 300 lbs and has issues with high BP, diabetes, etc. She can barely walk and her house is a perpetual mess.

Is this what I'm setting myself up for?

OP

some single women like a good looking married guy. they will flirt knowing it's going to be great and one night only. As for your wife, apples and oranges. Your wife has grown up differently than her mother. Your wife exercises and works. Her mother's era, most women did not workout or work after having children. Most of them either gained weight or did not. It was mostly genetics.

ride that pony hard because when the first baby comes along the bucking , wild horse becomes and slow ride, and after a few years, just on Saturday or Sunday.

yuuuy wrote:

my wife is absolutely nothing like her mother. Complete mismatch. Which has worked out for me.

Same here. My wife is hot, even after having kids. Smart, funny, easy going. I couldn't ask for anything better than my wife. Been together 20 years and life with her is getting better all the time.

My mother-in-law on the other hand...

I'm assuming your GF had a mother and father so her genetics is a combo of both. You need to determine which genes are predominate in your GF her mother's side or father's. If she looks and has the same body type as her mother did at her current age, then she will likely end up like her mother is currently, maybe not as bad, but who knows. On the other hand she may have gotten her father's looks/body type, and in that case you need to see what your GF's aunt's on her father's side look like. If she has no aunt's on the father's side then just assume that in 30 years no matter what she will gain weight and look older.

I wouldn't worry too much about looks or personality. It's unlikely that your woman will end up as a clone of her mother if she's not already there by now. What is MUCH MORE IMPORTANT is focusing on whether you can deal with your potential MIL for the next 20 or 30 years or whatever. Think worst case: What happens if she gets sick or something and moves in with you?

In my case, my wife is nothing like her mother -- in looks, personality, philosophy of life, or pretty much anything else. I married my wife because I like her looks, personality, etc, and her mother being the opposite means I actively DISLIKE her. I try to be patient and not let it create problems, but unfortunately it definitely adds tension to our marriage. Even when my MIL is blatantly doing or saying the wrong thing, if I say a word my wife will defend her and we'll get into a fight. Only my wife is allowed to say or do anything. That's just how it works, and I doubt my situation is unique.

So bottom line: It's not about what your potential wife may or may not become, it's rather about what you may have to deal with for decades. I love my wife, but looking back, I knew that my MIL was a nightmare and perhaps knowing what I know now I would have made a different decision. Think carefully before jumping in if you have any concerns.

Unfortunately, many good women are ruined by their dysfunctional families. It's really a shame and makes the dating pool even smaller than it already is in this grotesquely obese society. Good luck finding an attractive, down to earth girl let alone an attractive, down to earth girl with a supportive family.

What does your GF look like now? Does she run is she active? What is her place like, is it clean and well looked after?

I would look more to what your GF is actually like herself before worrying about what her mother was like. She isn't a kid, she's in her late 20's and so is, or should be, a fully developed person. If she is currently nothing like her mother, then don't worry. If she's already exhibiting traits that remind you of her mother, then, yeah, she will be like her mother.

Your girlfriend's relatives matter genetically but it's a nature/nurture argument so there is no guarantee how your girlfriend will turn out, life's a journey. Best test is the arms - if she has big and/or flabby arms then she's going to get bigger. If her arms are small then you should be ok. Better than 90% correlation with arm size and long term weight.