Wife is getting fat. What to do?

Could be a thyroid issue. Does she drink a lot?

I'd have her track her diet and go to the doctor. She doesn't seem receptive to it though. You say you have a happy marriage, but could something else like work or family be stressing her out so she's eating more?

I've been married for over 15 years and although both us have gained some weight, it's both been less than 10 pounds each. Neither of us were close to running D1, but we've both qualified for Boston multiple times, so we are avid runners.

Husbandoliver wrote:

She still runs and seems to keep a pretty healthy lifestyle, but she is gaining a lot of weight. I'd say 30 pounds in the last year-and-a-half.

- Long distance running has nothing to do with a "healthy lifestyle". Read this a few times. The sooner you accept it, the better.

- Thyroid could be an issue as it is well documented that long distance running messes with your hormones. The fix is not medication, the fix is to run LESS.

- Most women in the US (I assume you're from the States) believe in a high carb (whole grain), moderate protein (from beans and tofu) and low fat diet. This simply doesn't work and will eventually lead to massive mid-section weight gain ("skinny fat").

- she probably doesn't lift because she is concerned about getting "bulky", am I right?

- also, I assume she doesn't do any real sprints?

CASE CLOSED.

Embrace it. More cushion for the pushin'

The only solution is for your to start working from home. That way she is never out of your control. She is binging on brownies and cookies that she hides behind the laundry detergent where she thinks you won't look, because the laundry is her job.

Being home all day will allow you to catch her in these sneaky transgressions and put an end to them.

Or, you could have an affair and tell her it is because she was too fat for you to be interested in her any more. This would be the "all-in" approach though, since it will either result in her getting fit again and losing that weight or in her gaining even more weight as she spirals into depression.

Seriously though, weight gain/loss is easy. It is calories in minus calories out. She is quite simply either eating too much or exercising too little. Admittedly controlling this is made difficult by having little kids constantly needing her attention. She probably also developed poor habits while pregnant and breastfeeding. Now that she is no longer expending calories directly feeding a second human, that excess goes into her.

Assuming you are done having children, it is simply a matter of getting back to old habits that didn't involve eating too much and not exercising enough. If she doesn't want to get back into shape for her own sake, she won't. All you can do is support her if she wants to make it happen.

If she is defensive, it sounds like she wants to, but feels overwhelmed. She suddenly has to work to keep fit. Welcome to aging and having children. If other people can do it, somebody who has the mental and emotional determination to run DI track and xc can do it. But just like running, it won't happen overnight. Losing 30 pounds should take her a full year. If she accepts that, it will go a long way towards making it a long term change that she can stick with.

This. Enjoy being with a real woman.

didnt take long wrote:

Embrace it. More cushion for the pushin'

Xfit_guy_the_real_1 wrote:

- Most women in the US (I assume you're from the States) believe in a high carb (whole grain), moderate protein (from beans and tofu) and low fat diet. .

This is directly from your ass.

Sure, all you hear about from women in the US is how they get their proteins from beans and tofu.

I would look into stress, or not getting enough sleep, or not moving around enough during the day. I have read studies that indicate exercising daily will not have that much of a beneficial effect if you are sedentary the rest of the day.

Of course, the responsibility of kids makes planning for all this a little more difficult. I am not really sure why people have kids except for the evolutionary desire to pass on your genes and somebody to take care of you when you are old and crippled.

She may need to go back to work. Just because her not working is the correct decision for the 4 of you, overall, and she is willing to take the bullet/weight, that does not mean it is the best decision for her health. My wife works but puts our family above her sleep and every year, 5 more pounds...

didnt take long wrote:

Embrace it. More cushion for the pushin'

Not sure if trolling or not.

There are two different kinds of "thickness".

A diet high in saturated fat and protein with healthy carbs (vegetables, fruits, tubers) while maintaining a calorie surplus will lead to desirable weight gain in hips and "chest" area.

A diet high in vegetable oils (n-6), grains and legumes will lead to weight gain in the belly area (again, SKINNY FAT).

Make her mow the grass. The exercise will do her good. You can takeover the kid duties on weekends/evenings. It will be a good break from the kids for her.

Xfit_guy_the_real_1 wrote:

There are two different kinds of "thickness".

A diet high in saturated fat and protein with healthy carbs (vegetables, fruits, tubers) while maintaining a calorie surplus will lead to desirable weight gain in hips and "chest" area.

A diet high in vegetable oils (n-6), grains and legumes will lead to weight gain in the belly area (again, SKINNY FAT).

More made BS from the Cult_Fit_Paleo_Clown. Holy God your are a brain-washed twit. The Jenny McCarthy of nutrition.

garth wrote:

This. Enjoy being with a real woman.

didnt take long wrote:

Embrace it. More cushion for the pushin'

It's bound to happen. After 40 years with my wife, she is twice the woman I married but she progressed from being beautiful to being a beautiful person.

Honesty man. Honesty. She's not gonna divorce you for calling her fat. If you're afraid of a little confrontation, maybe you should gain some weight, too, and then suggest going on a diet together.

Leave her. She'll immediately lose 120 lbs. of stringbean runnerboy a--hole.

This thread is useless without pics!

Prepare a power point presentation on why she should lose weight.

Old Man Runner wrote:

This thread is useless without pics!

Ha, we already know she gained weight mostly in the belly and not where it counts.

I already laid out the solution.

Now it's up to the OP to fix the situation.

Make your own damn dinner, wash your own damn clothes and give me a little time to myself. Life with you is a chore.