I remember the bare bones plot but can't find it - anyone remember it?
A crew of humans in a space ship are stranded on another planet and must face the truth that they can never go home to Earth. The inhabitants of this planet are welcoming and congenial and know a lot about our culture, though I think I remember they look rather like lizards.
As the years go by, the crew members react in their individual ways to their situation. One couple have a baby, but when he drowns as an adolescent, the mother kills herself.
The crew member who is the protagonist has a long-term relationship with an alien “woman” who is very cultured and sensitive, and she cares for him, but she finally breaks it off because she realizes that he cannot fully reconcile himself to her alien-ness.
So he is alone, withdrawn, and finally is the only one of his kind left. He decides he will kill an alien, a random murder, and then kill himself.
He goes to a symphony concert and decides his victim will be the old “man” who happens to be sitting next to him, but in intermission the man chats about his grandson, who recently died, and the human somehow recognizes that they share an essential "humanity" and gives up the murder.
The intermission ends and the old man, sighing, says something like, “Well, let’s listen to the Brahms.”