What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you in a race?

This was more funny than anything. I was doing a local 1/2 ironman distance triathlon and I'm pretty fast master female and did Kona the year before....which makes this novice mistake even funnier...... I am signed up in the open division which goes in the first wave and all the other age group waves are standing on the beach waiting for their start. I am just getting ready not realizing the race is about to start. I have my wet suit 1/2 on and am 400m from the start when I hear the gun go off.....*hit.....I start running to the swim start.....I pull my wet suit on...first race of the season and had only worn it a few times before... I ask a volunteer to help zip me and realize I have it on BACKWARD and the zipper is in front.....I dive in and just start swimming....it wasn't even uncomfortable which was a suprise...

Since this is a local triathlon ....I know a lot of people at the race....I got the best comments the whole rest of the race...as the speedy male age groupers passed me.....I heard.. "nice start"......"put that wet suit on much"....."glad to see you could join us"..... I finished in the same spot I thought I could do so no damage done.....

A couple friends were planning to jog a 10k that was put on by a charity, and invited me since they knew I was a runner. I had planned a workout that day anyway, so I figured I'd just go and run it as a tempo. I was expecting it to be a real race with at least a few faster guys there, but when I showed up it became clear that it was a much more lowkey event, more like a group run/walk around a local park. They didn't even have roads closed or anything.

At the start I'm already feeling awkward because I'm the only one wearing a singlet and split shorts, and everyone else is clearly NOT taking it that seriously. But I had already psyched myself up to do a tempo, so I figure I'll just go for it anyway. Well the director starts us off, and I'm definitely the only one running fast because I'm immediately way out front of everyone. At around the 1/2 mile, there's a turn with a few volunteers to show people where to go. But at that point I'm so far ahead that the other people aren't in sight, and the volunteers don't realized I'm part of the event and I end up going the wrong way and cutting off part of the course. The course is supposed to be a 5k loop that you run twice, and when I make it back to the start (end of first loop), the clock is only at 12 minutes. The spectators milling around the start are sort of cheering but also looking at me like who TF is this guy. At that point I realize that I basically just cheated in this charity 10K, so I just decide to go finish my run somewhere else and I turn the wrong way off of the course while people are yelling at me that it's the wrong way and looking at me like seriously WTF is this guy doing. I ended up finishing my run in a different part of the park, sneaking back to my car before anyone saw me or my friends were finished, and just leaving.

It was my second day in a new town, and I decided to run a charity 3k that was hosted by a former colleague in memory of his son. I was the leader after the first mile, going through in 5:53 , which is pretty fast for me, but there is a decent downhill (I realize this is a hobbyjogger pace on this website). Next thing I know, I'm so far in first place that I can't see anyone behind me. My Garmin tells me I've hit 2 miles, and I'm getting concerned. I realize I missed a turn somewhere and have absolutely no idea where I am. I had to flag down multiple cars to see if they could direct me towards the start. I was hoping for a ride, but no one was willing to pick up some idiot in shorts and an singlet who claims to be running a race but is all alone. I did make my way back and have run the race again since then.

I missed my chance for glory (and a free pair of shoes for the winner). My wife has been giving me crap for whining about this for quite some time after. She is 100% justified.

When I was 14, I ran a cross country race as a high school freshman in shorts that I now know were too small to contain my junk properly. During the last 100 meters as I unleashed my finishing kick, I also unleashed my bait and tackle when the shorts liner gave way. Not only did people see everything I had as I raced down that finishing strait, the moment was preserved on camera as well.

Good times.

Titty wrote:

Let's hear your stories!

My first collegiate 5000. Indoors at indiana they made me run an extra lap in front of everyone.

Or my first collegiate 1500at the alabama relays. where I was seeded 10 seconds faster than my p.r Out of all the entrants I was still seeded last. I finished 2nd to last.

Or the time my hs ran the dmr season opener and I was the last leg. Our sprint coach on the infield told me great job as I went by and right after that our rival school blew by as I had not yet started my kick. It didn;t look embarrassing on film but to me it was because I hate losing to them and maybe couldve held them off. I split 4:35 to his 4:28 that leg so maybe not.

all my stories are essentially at the beginning of every season lol

Titty wrote:

Let's hear your stories!

Love your username

3 stories, not necessarily embarrassing, but of interest perhaps.

1. When I was about 42 years old and still running about 35 minutes for 10km, I was in a 15km race. Immediately at the start 4 Kenyans took out like shot out of a canon. By 2 miles I was running with about 4 guys and the Kenyans out of sight. Somehow the Kenyans went off course and/or we were. Suddenly the lead vehicle is back in front of us as I pull away from the others. Feeling good expecting to finish 5th, we turn a corner and suddenly there ahead is the finish line. Everyone is cheering as the stunned announcer is telling the crowd I’m about to destroy the world record. I cruised across the finish line in 39 minutes and change. Immediately I informed the RD as runners were coming across the finish. Complaints all around but I did not, simply telling the RD that mistakes happen. I left refusing to accept any award. Never saw the Kenyans. They might still be lost.

2. Four years ago at the BAA 10km I followed a super!!!!! cute girl wearing bunhuggers the entire race. About 40m from the finish she totally lost control and her poop/diarrhea was forced out of her bunhuggers with what seemed like a pile still inside. Felt sorry for her and ruined my memory of her nice rear for the 6.19 miles I ran behind it.

3. Half marathon in Chicago several years ago. Cold and rainy. My hamstring gave way when I slipped around a turn at about the 5 mile mark. No way I could finish or jog back to my hotel. I started to walk. Not a great part of town!! An older Nissan with two, shall I say ‘dark skinned’ females pulled up alongside and asked for directions to get across the course, due to road closures. As I helped them it occurred to me that they would be going past my hotel so I asked for a ride. They were silent for a bit then said ‘what the hell.’ I get in the backseat and on the floor was a puppy that had crapped on the floor and a baby maybe 1 year old in a car seat but not strapped in nor was the seat itself. As I help them navigate around the passenger suggests the baby should be in the front. I mention it’s not safe but they pulled over and the passenger brought the baby to the front and the one girl gets in the back with me. We arrive at my hotel and I thank them. The girl who moved to the backseat then blurred out ‘you want a blöwjob up in your room for $30 or you can fück me for $50, but only like 15 minutes because we gots to go.’ I politely declined and she didn’t say a word. I got out and they drove away.

I was the anchor on a mile relay team in HS at a chilly early season outdoor meet. I was wearing old school baggy cotton sweat pants. When I tried to take my sweats off when the 3rd leg took off, I couldn’t untie the drawstring because of a badly made knot and frozen fingers. I fumbled with the knot for a while and then got down on the ground to try to wriggle out of them but my teammate was already coming down the straigtaway in first place. I had to jump back onto the track and fight for my 1st place position just in time to get the stick. I gamely ran as fast as I could in my baggy sweats as all the other runners passed me one by one. I caught an earful from my team and coach and didn’t hear the end of it for a long, long time.

I was a freshman 800/1500 guy at a (then) Pac 10 school. We had a pretty decent distance squad and in dual meets we usually only entered 2-3 guys per event. We were going up against Oregon the next day and only entered 2 guys in the 1500 so I was not scheduled to run. So Friday night I went out with some buddies, drank a fair amount of beer and ended up at a house party where I met a girl who had gone to high school with one of these buddies. Not just any girl, mind you, but the reigning runner up Miss (name of state redacted). Spectacularly hot. She was buzzed, I was buzzed, we hit it off, danced all night, drank copiously, and then went out for a huge breakfast at an all night diner with several people from the party. After that a few more hours of making out in a car.

I rolled into my house about 5 am, still very drunk, and crashed. Got up at 11:00, had some leftover pizza and staggered over to the stadium to watch the meet. As soon as I arrive, the coach yells my name and waves me over to him. Our number one 1500 runner had wrenched his knee that morning getting out of the shower and I was next man up. I got changed into my uniform but felt so queasy I couldn’t even warm up, just walked up to the starting line as if I was walking into a supermarket.

Once the race started, I fell further and further behind and my stomach was doing flip flops. As soon as I crossed the finish line in DFL, a good 18 seconds behind the winner, I did not stop or take off my spikes, but kept running directly to the locker room where I puked my guts out for five solid minutes. Then I showered and went straight home, not wanting to face any of the coaches or teammates. Even worse, I never saw the girl again, she transferred to another school at the end of that quarter. Fortunately we lost the meet by 20 points so my performance didn’t hurt anything except my pride.

My main events in high school were the 110 hurdles and 300m hurdles. My embarrassing day took place at a regular season home meet against a rival high school in North Carolina. The other school's top hurdle guy was ranked #1 in our conference in both events, and I was #2....perpetually in his shadow. But I had vowed that this day would be the day I conquered him and became the new hurdle king.....at home in front my friends, family, and teachers attending the meet.

The prospect of defeating my rival was psyching me out. I was all tense and jittery. So when the gun went off for the start of the 110h, I think the extra adrenaline altered my steps a little to the first hurdle, causing me to clear it awkwardly, which then created a snowball effect of bad timing & form over the next couple of hurdles. I immediately realized that I was done for. My rival was already a full hurdle ahead of me and I was so discouraged I quit the race and stepped off the track. As I did so, I slipped in a big puddle and fell in the mud.

Despite being embarrassed and disappointed, I still had hope of redeeming myself in the 300m hurdles. So I tried my best to shake off the defeat and focus on the next race. The first 100m of that race went well. I stormed down the backstretch and cleared the first couple of hurdles ahead of my rival. Then, as I rounded the turn, I could see that the next hurdle in my lane appeared to have been blown over by the wind. So as I got to this hurdle, I just gave a little half-assed hop over it. But my foot caught the metal frame, and down I went......again. And there goes my rival, roaring down the track like a freight train.

I got up and argued with the officials about the blown-over hurdle, claiming that it distracted me and caused me to misstep. Of course, they were a little confused as to why a hurdle lying on the ground would be considered a disadvantage, but they begrudgingly allowed me to run in the next heat. I won that heat, but my time was still slower than my rival's, and so it didn't matter. I was just the guy who fell and then argued that a LOWER barrier had caused me to fall.

On the plus side, I was so pissed off about everything that had happened, it fueled me for the 4x200 later on. I destroyed the first leg, making up the stagger before the first hand off. We won the relay and I kind of redeemed myself a little. But I'll never forget falling twice in the same meet like a goober, watching my rival leave me in the dust.

Titty likes these stories!

I won. Everyone else felt embarrassed that I won. Then I felt embarrassed for them. It just went on and on like this until we all went home. Devastated.

Get back to me next time you race 6 months post-partum.

How about the time I flew from Seattle to Boston for a track meet and wasn’t allowed to run?

Or the time I showed up at the local meet and forgot I still had a butt plug wedged up in me?

I signed up for a local 5k in a new town I had just moved to. I showed up to the race looking to run fast and I then realized that it was a fundraiser for an elementary school. Everyone besides me was either 8 years-old or their parents. Meanwhile, me, 24, in split shorts and a singlet and spikes, still ran it hard and won it in 17:30. The next closest time was like 25 minutes, and that was a pre-teen who had tried to hang with me for the first quarter mile.

I felt bad, but I just really wanted to see where I was at fitness-wise. The race directors did not give the 1st place prize to me and they told me that I should "find a more elite race next year."

I was having a colitis flare up but decided to run a cross-country race anyways. Just before the start of the race, when everyone was lined up, my guts started cramping up and I made an emergency dash for the trees. The race director saw this, grabbed his bullhorn and yelled at me in front of everyone to get back to the starting line and quit trying to cheat. I wasn't very far into the trees and most of the people at the starting line turned and looked just as I pulled my pants down.

Wow, how on earth did they not give you the first place prize when you ran and clearly finished first? They shouldn't advertise it as a race if they don't want people running fast, I think that's really wrong. The whole point of a race is to run as fast as you can, don't understand how that concept can get confused.

“...shall I say ‘dark skinned’ females”(?)

Dude, that’s so lame!

Coming to America will have a sequel wrote:

2. Four years ago at the BAA 10km I followed a super!!!!! cute girl wearing bunhuggers the entire race. About 40m from the finish she totally lost control and her poop/diarrhea was forced out of her bunhuggers with what seemed like a pile still inside. Felt sorry for her and ruined my memory of her nice rear for the 6.19 miles I ran behind it.

My God, that is so massively brutal. RIP those bunhuggers.

I'll add mine. I signed up for a 10k a few months out. It was like $10 and I thought it would motivate me to get my training back on track. As you can all guess, it didn't. Between the time I registered and the race, which was about four months, I'd probably run a total of fifty miles. To say I was trained at all would be a massive overstatement. But I drove there and paid, so I figured what the hell.

Gun goes off and I run the first k in about 4:30. Not terrible. Roll through two k in about 9:03 and three in 13:30. So I'm slowly dying, but not unreasonably badly. Right before four k, a dude pushing a double wide stroller blows past me. Feeling pretty demoralized, I press on figuring that I'm two-fifths done, so I may as well finish. I get to eight k and there's a hill. Not super steep, but way too much for my lack of fitness. I get maybe a quarter way up it and realize I just have to walk. I get passed by women my age, masters men, and masters women. At the top I finally start running again, and run the last however much to the finish. I ran 57:xx that day.