Abstinence from premarital sex for non-religious reasons..are mine LAME? (male)

loqueelvientoajuarez wrote:

Would you buy shoes without trying them first?

Because a wife is the same thing as a pair of shoes. Nice perspective.

horndog wrote:

First off, I would like to eventuallybe in a committed monogamous relationship and have kids.

Given this,

1. I would like to be as sure as possible that I will be committed in marriage. Abstinence from premarital sex would surely be a good test.

2. I don't think I could be a proper judge of a woman's character while having sexual relations. The euphoria from it would cloud my judgement.

Two reasons, independent of religious revelation, why you are making the right decision:

Abstinence is the single greatest thing you can do as a dating couple to build future trust in your relationship. Imagine after 20 years of marriage, and you wonder if your spouse would cheat on you, and you remember how he/she had self control while you were engaged, madly in-love, and horny as f***. Anyone whose been married for a while knows that trust is the most important ingredient in the relationship.

Also, if you boink your GF and then break up, you will forever be a source of regret for that person. Women like to lie to themselves and say they don't regret it, but they do. And in the quite moment of your life, when you are really honest with yourself, you will regret it too. Real respect for another human being means you don't act like you are married to that person until you are actually married to that person.

joedirt wrote:

Religions merely adopted morals to encourage logical behavior.

False.

Also false.

Hardloper wrote:

English as 3rd language wrote:

Yeah but you take the hypothese that you have to look at the divorce rate, but that's incorrect. What we have to look is the percentage of truly happy married people. But I think those statistics don't exist.

Lol, that's a ridiculous smokescreen. The statistics refute your point, so you imagine there's some other stat that might back you up even though it will never exist. Real convincing.

To the OP, who cares if some yahoos on the Internet think you're "lame"?

Did you actually read what I wrote ? I don't imagine, I said they would be better ones.

I don't have a problem with your statistics because they refute my point (according to you because you guys haven't shown any yet and I'm too lazy to do the research) but because they are biased.

Religious people not having sex before marriage almost never divorce "no matter what", because divorce is too unacceptable for their religious beliefs. So the divorce rate is not a good proof of successful marriage for them since they stay married even if 1 or the 2 partners are deeply unhappy. Now if you consider a marriage with unhappy people still successful because they are not divorced, well that's another story. I personally don't.

You think no sex before marriage leads to more succesful weddings, I believe the "no sex before marriage" and "sex before marriage" probably have the same chances of "leading to deeply happy people within their marriage". Since those statistics probably don't exist (as far as I know), they remain believes, not the truth. But pretending no sex before marriage leads to more happiness because of the divorce ratio is just intellectually incorrect, sorry.