Married dudes, how did you know she was "the one"?

isofj;sfjqf wrote:

They're usually easy to rule OUT.

Ruling them the winner is a bit trickier but if they're in the game for a while and still a possibility, it'll be fine. Don't lose an Olympic qualifier because your're hoping for a gold medalist. Most important thing, imo, is that your personalities/values are compatible.

Agree with this. I'm happily married. I never believed there was a "one." Rather, I believe there are probably a number of women I could spend my life with, but you have to choose one. Once you find one that works, make your bed and sleep it in.

adiBRO wrote:

It takes two, not merely "the special one."

This is probably the right answer.

Of course it’s correct..,two souls emerge as one.

In all fairness and to the OP, I believe the “one” will be who you can’t stop thinking or live without in your lonely moments....otherwise let Karma do the work.

“To say that one waits a lifetime for his soulmate to come around is a paradox. People eventually get sick of waiting, take a chance on someone, and by the art of commitment become soulmates, which takes a lifetime to perfect.”

Criss Jami

Haven’t read the thread yet but this came to mind immediately.

No you really don't understand real love and it's sad for you. Trying to explain love to you is like trying to explain color to a blind person.

Bad Wigins wrote:

No, it's you who misunderstand. You shouldn't want to marry only one, even if one is all can eventually choose.

As far as the op's question, your heart tells you she's the one and your head agrees.

There are more than 1 person in the world that could be "the one". But if you meet one of them, and give it the time, not forcing it then you could be happily Married with Children (like me since 2010) sooner or later. In most cases, later would be better. If your values match, it will help your every day life. You have to respect your partner, if you want that she/he respects you. Everything will be easier then and you could have a really long-term relationship. Until death do us apart...which is what we don't know when that happens. When I saw a picture of her's which she send me in a letter (and vice versa), I had the feeling inside me, that really made me want to meet her face to face. Like we did, over 13 years ago.

Raphe wrote:

I've been seeing a girl for awhile now, and it's looking more and more like there's really something there. Married dudes, how did you know she was "the one"? How long did that take?

I knew my wife was “the one” within two or theee weeks of dating. I found myself wanting to hangout with her instead of my friends even after the deed was finished. With previous girlfriends, the action was all I was really after. Once that part was over, I was ready to hangout with the guys, drink, and play video games again.

Pray about it to God. He will answer you in some way.

I knew I wanted to marry my ex-wife when she went back to college at the end if the summer and I wanted to try out the long distance relationship.

We got married three years later. We had some good years and some really bad years, and now we're just waiting on the final divorce papers.

We still care about each other but we're poor communicators, bad at showing affection and tired of living with each other. I still consider her to be one of my best friends and I don't regret marrying her. I just regret that we couldn't make it work.

Everyone else I'd dated I'd think, "She's great, but..." With my now-wife of 20 years, I thought, "She's great, and..." And I still feel that way.

Here ya go:

When you each know the worst thing about each other, and still choose to love each other.

Remember: Love is a choice. Infatuation "just happens".

I walked into the front door of a house party, I saw this smiling gorgeous girl with piles of black curly hair and great legs sitting on the floor talking to a group of people. My maternal grandmother (who'd passed away 22 years earlier) whispered in my ear, "she'll do fine".

smd wrote:

Everyone else I'd dated I'd think, "She's great, but..." With my now-wife of 20 years, I thought, "She's great, and..." And I still feel that way.

see that's how ive felt about almost all the women i've dated. Interesting to see that that feeling never stops. Why can't I feel compleltely satisfied?

Jah boi wrote:

Wanna remain anonymous wrote:

Because a few friends on know my regular Letsrun handle, I'm going to post this anonymously.

We were both distance runners in college. While we were dating we once spent the night in the pole vault pit. Never in my life had I ever felt as comfortable and at ease with anyone as that night and I knew that I would like to do that for the rest of my life.

For the record, at the time we hadn't done the deed yet, nor did we that night. Also for the record, we have now been married more than 35 years. It is still as magical as that night in the pole vault pit.

But why? Why did it feel magical?

Because he cleared 5 inches

Night observer wrote:

As far as the op's question, your heart tells you she's the one and your head agrees.

This, plus you think about her when not around each other.

Raphe wrote:

I've been seeing a girl for awhile now, and it's looking more and more like there's really something there. Married dudes, how did you know she was "the one"? How long did that take?

It took 18 months for me to know she was "the one"

1. She was hot even in grubby running clothes...and spectacular all dressed up.

2. She didn't annoy me or have some impractical view on life.

3. I had no resentment towards her even after we fought.

4. She was smarter than me, had her own career, had her own hobbies, and not many boyfriends or relied on men to fill some void her life.

5. She was respectful of my running and hobbies.

Read the "road less traveled" - book from the 80s about the falling in love and what it is and what it isnt..and

marry someone who has the same values as you........

Sdfsdfsdfsdfsdf wrote:

Agree with this. I'm happily married. I never believed there was a "one." Rather, I believe there are probably a number of women I could spend my life with, but you have to choose one. Once you find one that works, make your bed and sleep it in.

When you find one who makes the bed for you with no complaint, stop looking!

I have a strong feeling that at least half the married men would answer this question truthfully by saying " She told me"