It’s senior year of high school ‘92 and I’m running a hard 6-mile loop around Point Lobos State Reserve when I quickly come up behind two older ladies talking loudly and walking side-by-side, taking up almost the width of the entire trail.
Since the trail was twisty, I had just enough time to say “Excuse me!”, but apparently they didn’t hear it, so I end up having to side skirt past them almost off trail into some intense poison oak. As I blast by, I hear gasps of surprise, so I call out “Sorry!” and keep going.
About thirty minutes later on the other side of the park, as I’m nearing the end of my run, I encounter the same two ladies, but by this time it’s getting dark they are coming toward me, so I’m not 100% sure who they are, especially since it would’ve taken an aggressive hike (and possibly a drive) to beat me to the spot coming from the opposite direction.
As I run toward them, I’m debating this and whether to stop and apologize again, when suddenly one of them lunges at me, grabs the collar of my shirt, and with spit flying out her mouth and her face twisted in a furious mask, screams “YOU G*DDAMN C**KSVCKER!!!!!” and attempts to drill me with a full roundhouse punch to the head.
Mind you, this b*tch was approaching 70 years old, so I was able to duck in time, but it was very startling to a 17 year old. I ripped myself from her claws, backed away and said, “You. Crazy. C*NT!!!”, then turned around. As I run away, I hear them screaming about getting the park rangers, calling the cops, and whatnot. Lol!
This is a true story and I am so happy it happened. It brings me comfort knowing those ladies are most likely dead by now.