Follow up to worst coach: Dumbest thing you've heard a coach say regarding running?

thresher shark wrote:

[quote]coach said many things wrote:

"run these intervals at threshold pace. That's the pace you can barely hold for 400 meters"

[quote]

different threshold.

you are being overly generous in your assumptions about the coach's knowledge. I am grateful for all the excellent coaches I was lucky to have- but this wasn't one of them.

"You run to win the race"

Finals? You kidding me? Finals? We're just trying to win a heat.

There's one coach I've heard of, and I think he may post here occasionally, that swears EPO doesn't help his athletes. Psycho, right?

My hs high jump coach came over to me and asked why the distance team ran so much. Said if it were up to him, we should just race a mile everyday and that would be sufficient.

I had a coach for a track season in high school who at our first meeting said to the team

1. Never run faster than conversation pace but don't hold anything back.

2. No one will wear spikes in races because they're bad for your feet.

Over head at a HS track meet,

Coach:Charles Barkley can run faster then you

Athlete:You know he is a professional athlete

Coach:Well I guess athletes can be fat

Athlete:F*ck You

My Coach in College (Russ Rogers) told me to run 50MPW over the summer heading into my senior year X-C season, even though I told him I ran 115MPW the year before and had a great X-C season. He told me to run 50MPW that summer anyway. Had a lousy season it took me all the way to NC's to get anywhere near fit.

Idiots or not, here we are quoting them!

Mine, during an I terval workout I heard a coach tell his athletes:

"Close you mouth. You breath through your nose only!"

Got quite angry about it.

"start out as fast as you can and gradually increase your speed"

My track head coach, in a speech to the whole team, gave examples of the kind of steady progress he wanted to see from us. After talking a bit about jumping the extra inch, or dropping .1 in the 100, he said wanted to see us dropping 2 minutes in the 10k, or 3 minutes in the 5k.

"You got this" ...what exactly is it that you got?

"Go now!" believe me if I could I would

"If all of your races are on the track, why would you do any training off of the track?"

"Don't f____ it up!"

Heard on starting the line of a 5000:

"I want you in pain from the second the gun goes off"

Imagine an old man southern accent.

"4 to 6 bottles is good, 5-6 bottles is even ..uhh... good"

Once my old coach said this about how many bottles of water we should drink during the school day before practice. It was so great because he realized in the middle of his statement that what he was saying made no sense.

Any coach that says " You have to go now!" in the first half of the race.

I'll hide the geography to hide the identity, because this guy was really good, and kind of legendary and I don't want to expose him, though I do want to make fun of him.

When describing any particular running route

"You know that street what the McDonald's is on, well don't go there. Keep going until you get to the street what the Burger King is, then go back around to the street what the McDonald's in on, and then keep looping around."

"You know why you all suck? Because you don't have any confidence."