Have you ever tried to impress a girl by telling her you're an All-American?

I witnessed a guy tell a girl he was an All American (legit) and it was working like a charm until Mike Powell showed up. Yes, the Mike Powell. I have never seen someone get c-blocked so hard in all my life.

And this was like 3 years ago.

My wife doesn't care that i am an all-american. She as 4 more certs than i do.

Just tell her you ran sub 4, it would probably work better since everyone knows sub 4 is gnarly

shoe guy wrote:

Just tell her you ran sub 4, it would probably work better since everyone knows sub 4 is gnarly

no, no one cares about that either.

I went to a restaurant in Israel. I was pretty hungry after a 18 miler. I ate like a pig. Olives, hummus, shawarma, lamb, babaganouche, baklava, what not.... In the end, the tab came up to $75. I asked the server if there was any discount for being all-American. Server said let me see what I can do. Came back in a few minutes with - This one's on the house. Have a great day.

Just for being all-American!!

AnotherAllAmerican wrote:

I went to a restaurant in Israel. I was pretty hungry after a 18 miler. I ate like a pig. Olives, hummus, shawarma, lamb, babaganouche, baklava, what not.... In the end, the tab came up to $75. I asked the server if there was any discount for being all-American. Server said let me see what I can do. Came back in a few minutes with - This one's on the house. Have a great day.

Just for being all-American!!

Funny story. If I was going to lie, I'd lie about something much less verifiable and much more impressive. Most people can't remember super bowl championship quarterbacks, much less top 30 cross country geeks from 1995. There's an art to lying and you need to be smart to pick one you can maximize your return on with minimal risk. Being an NCAA all-american would be pretty low on both lists for me.

You miss the point. The point is that in some places like Israel it is big to be all-American. At least me, it paid off. $75!! Heck ya! (75 is big for me, maybe it aint for you)

AnotherAllAmerican wrote:

I went to a restaurant in Israel. I was pretty hungry after a 18 miler. I ate like a pig.

Eating like a pig in an Israeli restaurant? That doesn't sound too Kosher.

1) I wasn't anywhere close, but as I kept running post-collegiately, one announcer continued to upgrade my status, so I eventually became an A-A in his mind and in the minds of people in the stands.

2) I once had a girl try to impress me by telling me she was national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette. I asked her if she knew Keith Hanson, and she said she didn't. Then I told her that was odd, because Keith Hanson had been national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette in the same year she had claimed to be. In retrospect, perhaps I should have let her go with it; since I was the only other serious runner at this particular social function, maybe it might have led somewhere.

I once hooked with a girl because my wingman said "My friend here has never been in the Olympics".

Hey Idiots wrote:

It is "couldn't care less."

I think I counted 750 "could care less" responses.

Get it right or pay the price, Budnick!

I love it when people try to correct something that isn't incorrect. Hey asshole, you can use it either way.

If you say you could care less, it means the person you are talking to should be grateful for what little you do care. It's sort of a sarcastic "watch your step" remark. Why would you say you couldn't care less if you really could but don't care that much?

If you're 40 or over, you may not even have to lie. The USATF "All-American Road Running Standard of Excellence" for Masters men is a sub-21:00 5K.

Attain this standard, and for $12 you can even get a certificate from the USATF affirming your All-American status.

I was trying to write a response to this in the form of a story from college that made me think of all the "you're a skinny weird runner" related insults that fly around this board. I was not an AA or even a national qualifier at the small d3 school I attended, but I had so many people approach me at various times (between classes walking around, at weekend parties, football games, etc) and strike up a conversation because they had seen me running all over. The posters on this board act like being a runner plants a social plague on your life, but in reality I've found that most people respect what we do as what it is...more miles in a month than many of them run in their life.

And FWIW, I did try to hook up with a girl on a bet concerning AA status, but since I dropped an "epic" bomb at regionals, I never got the chance to try. Don't worry, she didn't sleep with me.

Ghost of Ashenfelter wrote:

2) I once had a girl try to impress me by telling me she was national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette. I asked her if she knew Keith Hanson, and she said she didn't. Then I told her that was odd, because Keith Hanson had been national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette in the same year she had claimed to be. In retrospect, perhaps I should have let her go with it; since I was the only other serious runner at this particular social function, maybe it might have led somewhere.

This actually may be true. Katie Webb was national champ for Marquette in 1986 I believe, back when the women were still in the NAIA. The men's and women's team were completely separate and she was the type that probably wouldn't know the men's team that well. You would at least think she would know another national champion at the same school, but you never know.

I actually have got shut down for the "I'm on the CC team." However, I have told a few girls I was/am on the football team and play special teams(I went to a huge football school). This did work out once which led to a sloppy makeout and pocketpool after a few tequila shots. The times it didn't work out is when they clearly pointed out I weighed less than them, so if you try it, make sure it is in the winter and you are wearing a couple layers of clothing.

It was 1985 that she was the NAIA national champ, so one year before Keith did it in 1986.

Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills: like nunchuk skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills...

HAHAHA...I lol'd hard. POD for me. Thank you, I needed that.

Runner Girls POV:

Guys w/ speed goggles (who think girls have speed goggles as well) tell me they are all American all the time, or tell me their PR or something.

I ask them how many miles a week they run. If they respond with anything less than 130miles/week...I say: "No, thanks I don't date guys who run less miles than me."

Girls POV #2:

I'm an All-American in both XC and T&F and personally, I don't even like to bring up the fact that I AM a runner. For some reason, people feel the need to tell you the biggest BS story about their mile time or how far they ran the day before to try to impress you. Even if I met a guy out who looked like David Beckham AND I had on Beer Goggles, I still wouldn't bring him home once he decided to brag to me about his "3:30 mile time" he ran one day at the track.

True story, I sh*t you not, I decided to bring a guy home once which is not a regular occassion for me but I was excited to finally be drunk enough to allow myself a good time. As I'm in the next room looking for a DVD to watch, he's busy snooping through a small chest on my dresser and pulls out an All-American trophy for the 10k. He then proceeds to ask me what time I ran, and I told him. He then has the nerve to tell me he ran "about 25:00 mins" in a road 10k. I told him "No, no you didn't." He argued yes and asked why I would argue. At this point I was too drunk to care, and proceeded to tell him it was a world record by well over a minute and that he probably couldn't beat Bekele even with a 5k lead in the 10k. To end my rant, I made him leave and ended up ruining my own good time haha...

And this is why I will never tell anyone I'm All-American, esp if it involves getting laid.