My Fiance Wants me to Sign a Prenuptial

M3D3 wrote:

I got married for the 3rd time when I was over 50. She wanted a pre-nup because she had slightly greater assets than I did. I had no objection, and said so, because I had a business, a house, etc.

We didn't get around to it.

Disastrous mistake! During the divorce, which was no-fault, she came after everything I had, full-bore. (And no, nobody strayed/cheated/abused or anything like that.)

She walked away with probably $20,000 worth of items to which she was legally but not morally entitled. I say "not morally," because we had an oral agreement about who bought what, with whose money, etc. etc., and who "owned" it. Of course that oral agreement had no legal standing whatsoever.

So I'd say -- go ahead and sign it, but of course only after understanding what you're really agreeing to.

You got married for the 3rd time after you were 50 and then got divorced? Assuming your previous two wives didn't die, what the hell? I hope you've learned your lesson that you're not one to get married.

Again, get her pregnant within 2 years. Those grand parents will make sure that grandbaby is taken care of and that means dollas for daddy too! Even if you split.

That kid will be your meal ticket.

Be a man and sign the stupid prenup already!

prenup power up wrote:

If she feels she needs a prenup, then she doesn't trust you enough to get married. Find someone else.

Thats what the "lesser off" individual in a relationship always says because they have relatively nothing to lose. During my personal training years I had alot of wealthy clients. ALL insisted on prenups even if their spouse was more wealthy prior to marriage. One said use this...

A prenup will legally protect you and your assets from any emotional damage I might try to inflict on your financial situation in the event of a break-up.

Now it makes so much sense...how many girls go on spending sprees with the man's credit card after a relationship ending fight? Even the more wealthy will try to take everything to leave the lesser "centless" as a lesson. People act crazy during break-ups!

OK, I got past my reservations and signed it but the executed version voids the pre-nup after 10 years of marriage or when we have a child, whichever comes first.

Thanks to most for your input.

Are you willing to tell us something about the specific contents of the pre-nup?

I can't believe so many posters were telling you to sign it or not sign it in the absence of any details.

I mean, it is possible that a pre-nup just basically lists the assets that each party brings to the relationship and states that they keep those assets in divorce, but income/assets acquired during the marriage are split evenly. I certainly wouldn't object to that--as I've posted that is basically the law in my state anyway but listing those things would just make the dissolution easier.

I'd just be interested to know.

Good job! Everyone knows that the wheels begin to fall off most marriages at the 10 year mark. Just do your best to hold things together until the 10 yr anniversary and then you're home free!

you can avoid the hassle and just live together or just self-declare yourselves as marrieded, which is what peasants did in the olden days in the orient.

good luck wrote:

Good job! Everyone knows that the wheels begin to fall off most marriages at the 10 year mark. Just do your best to hold things together until the 10 yr anniversary and then you're home free!

Lol that's great.

live together wrote:

self-declare yourselves as marrieded, which is what peasants did in the olden days in the orient.

Social security and inheritance laws might not look in a positive manner upon such a self declaration of marriage.

Nah just knock her up and the you can start having an affair with your Au pair.

JD STANKY wrote:

good luck wrote:

Good job! Everyone knows that the wheels begin to fall off most marriages at the 10 year mark. Just do your best to hold things together until the 10 yr anniversary and then you're home free!

Lol that's great.

themanontherun wrote:I don't think it's stupid at all. Many people are motivated to productivity and wealth because they want to make an advantaged life for their children. Is it stupid to want the best for your children?

And the concept of 'deserves' is a funny thing. It's subjective. There is no such thing as one person deserving anything more than another, except in the eyes of the person doing the doling of the money.

In all honesty, I was trolling earlier but a few questions have come up that got me interested.

My honest opinion is simple: there's a difference between wanting what's best for your kids and giving then everything on a silver platter that, I think, that people fail to see. A little incentive to work hard never hurt anyone. Now, I can't say what the middle ground is, but you can argue that giving everything to one's kids isn't what's best for them either. "What's best" can even been seen as subjective.

As for the "there's no such thing as deserves" argument, I've gotta disagree. Just because there's some subjectivity in the concept dosen't mean that the whole idea is. I think it's fairly intuitive to say that Paris Hilton "deserves" the Hilton family fortune as much as the people who built the business from the ground up... is ludicrous. If you really want to go into more detail, just substitute deserves for "is worthy of." Or any number of merit based concepts.