Why do I feel weird saying I love you to family?

i hate saying it to my family. i lost a girlfriend cause i would never say it.

Especially my dad. Not sure what the issue is though.

Yep, was in the same boat with my Mom and Dad. Could never get myself to tell them that I loved them. They both died 2 months apart in 1997 and it is one of my life's regrets. I have a daughter and everytime we talk on the phone we end our call by saying " I love you"...

you're not understanding, this is not a question of feeling it is a question of language. Somewhere lost in translation the expression "i love you" has acquired a semantics of eros

Luckily, I have been quite successful in life and can now say "I love you" with gifts of jewelry and new cars rather than words.

Men who are uncomfortable with their sexual identities confuse this discomfort with the multiple semantics of the phrase "I love you" and come out being cold, inarticulate MEN when all they really need to do is just come out.

plato123 wrote:

you're not understanding, this is not a question of feeling it is a question of language. Somewhere lost in translation the expression "i love you" has acquired a semantics of eros

this. I'm not a fan of kissing any family members either for the same reason.

I really dont see a problem with this, everytime I come home from college and leave to go back to college I greet/say goodbye to my dad,mom, and 3 year old sister with a firm handshake and a simple "good luck".

Hey, you guys aren't listening to 5Ker - he has hit it right on the head. Don't wait until you have lost your mom, dad, brother, sister before you learn to say I love you, or you will always regret it. It really is not so hard to say.

I'm in the same boat as the OP.

I can understand the logic behind the whole "say it now or one day you'll no longer have the chance" thing. But at the same time, I have no doubt that my parents know that I love them. So what's the big deal if I don't speak the words themselves?

I'm not going to argue that you shouldn't say it. But I will say that I never said it to my dad. He then passed away suddenly about 12 years ago. I deeply grieved his passing but I honestly can say that I don't hold some deep regret that I never said I loved him.

Chromatin wrote:

Men who are uncomfortable with their sexual identities confuse this discomfort with the multiple semantics of the phrase "I love you" and come out being cold, inarticulate MEN when all they really need to do is just come out.

i would argue the opposite.

I hate saying 'I love you' for the simple fact that to me the more one says it the more deluded it feels. secondly, to me, the ones who tell me 'i love you' most often in my family, are usually the ones most short on action. these also tend to be the most insecure ones in my family.

Because you are emotionally repressed. You're going to have a hard time in life if you don't get over this hang-up of yours.

plato123 wrote:

you're not understanding, this is not a question of feeling it is a question of language. Somewhere lost in translation the expression "i love you" has acquired a semantics of eros

my life is worse than yours wrote:

this. I'm not a fan of kissing any family members either for the same reason.

Men are emotional dysfuncts. How about this as a remedy: Reserve the phrase "I love you" for those in your life you truly love. Use the phrase "I lust you" for your girlfriends. I can bet most of idiots on this board don't understand the difference between love and lust. You're all thinking with your dicks.

eewwqasdf wrote:

i would argue the opposite.

I hate saying 'I love you' for the simple fact that to me the more one says it the more deluded* it feels. secondly, to me, the ones who tell me 'i love you' most often in my family, are usually the ones most short on action. these also tend to be the most insecure ones in my family.

*Do you mean diluted, not deluded?

love and lust,

you are completely mistaken. I have a far-reaching emotional connection with my GF of four years, enhanced not defined by our physical intimacy. I'm sorry that you haven't had the experience of a truly loving boyfriend, but they do exist.

I've told my Dad I loved him once ever in my life. That was the day his own father died. I don't think I'll need to do it again. Once is enough.

I've told my Mum I loved her a few times. She's a little bit more needy.

I think it's easier telling children you love them compared to parents. Family relationships are inequalities.

my mother tried hugging me once after I came home from summer camp and I kind of shrugged her off.

anyone in the same boat wrote:

I'm sorry that you haven't had the experience of a truly loving boyfriend, but they do exist.

Yeah- you've experienced this type of "love" from a boyfriend? If not, shut up. You don't have a clue what you're talking about.