wanna leave wife..fed up

The wives are depressed

I'm sure OP has figured it out by now. OP, if you are checking this over 1500 days after your post, what did you decide?

I think more common than OP's situation is where spouse controls your free time. Like running or playing golf on the weekend.

I got married this year at 31 to my gf of 13 years. This thread is so depressing.

OP - you still about on LR?

Just hire hookers on the side. She deserves it because she takes advantage of you and does not give you what you want. She'll take you to town in a divorce one day anyways. She probably cheats anyways.

Bottom line... Men are takers and women are givers.

Men mistake women's generosity as boundless and assume them to be their personal doormats.

Women quickly tire of such relationships

It's the same at 70. You think that at that age you'd be different, but if you're still healthy and in good shape, you miss love, affection and sex just as much.

My wife and I have been married 35 years. 25 of it was good. 5 years tolerable. The last 5 we've been little more than "friends". As much her fault as mine, but at this point who cares.

I would never get married again.

Luckily we have plenty of money and we both still enjoy things in common. But the big three are missing.

I know this thread is old, but for anyone else going through something similar.

Don't immediately divorce her.

That's where the similarities between my advice and others' ends.

Get your shit together. Start working out. Eat better. Go out with some friends from work and don't tell your wife when you'll be home. Hit on some girls. Get your mojo back.

Your wife will probably nag. Who cares?

After doing this for a while, come home late one night and make a hard pass at your wife. Not flowers, dinner and a movie and some handholding. I mean pin her up against the wall and take her like you probably did when you first got together.

(nothing non-consensual, cause I know you losers will pipe up here)

Then see how things go.

If things get better, great. You've learned to stop being a nice guy and to get what you want. Your wife will appreciate this.

If she doesn't, get a lawyer, set your finances straight, and divorce her.

Louie Napoleon wrote:

It's the same at 70. You think that at that age you'd be different, but if you're still healthy and in good shape, you miss love, affection and sex just as much.

My wife and I have been married 35 years. 25 of it was good. 5 years tolerable. The last 5 we've been little more than "friends". As much her fault as mine, but at this point who cares.

I would never get married again.

Luckily we have plenty of money and we both still enjoy things in common. But the big three are missing.

+2

It is common knowledge that marriage is an institution. Yet people *still* get married and *then* a few years later get all upset when they find that they've been institutionalized.

My wife died. It was the greatest thing in the world to be married to her..Nothing, not even 40 years as a runner could match it....BUT

I too would never marry again..even to recover that happiness.

That sort of emotional investment a second or third time..I often wonder how they can do it....I admire that.

Enjoyed this. Terrific post

bummed wrote:

i make almost 100k per year..

Yikes. It must suck to be that poor. Why don't you just get a better paying job?

"The next time I feel like getting married, I'm just gonna find a gal I don't like very much and buy her house" - Willie Nelson

+2.

I'd also suggest getting nasty in the closet of a nice restaurant, but that is a quibble.

I don't know what the big deal is. I married a man who is great at parties and often finishes in the top 2-3 of his races (depending on timing mats). I guess I am just lucky.

eds wrote:

My wife died. It was the greatest thing in the world

I got that far into the post and had to chuckle a bit.

divorced and happy wrote:

Cal Atty wrote:

Dude, any guy who gets marrid before he's 30 is a schmuck. And getting married at 40 is far better than getting married at 30 -- especially if you find a bride a good 10 years younger than you. Guys don't have a biological clock to worry about, and if a guy is successful and stays in reasonbly decent shape, he's going to be a more attractive catch at 40 than at 30. My advice, have fun while you're young. Once you get hitched and have kids, your life isn't your own anymore.

Pay attention to every word that Cal Atty wrote here.

He is 100% correct. I have been proselytizing the same thing ever since i got divorced. DO NOT THINK ABOUT GETTING MARRIED BEFORE 30!!!!

Good luck convincing people from the Midwest of this...

I think the whole thought is

The next time I want to get married I'm going to find a woman I'm not having sex with and don't much like. I'll buy her a house and give her half my money.

A dude I work with rambled on to me all day about the best decision I could make is to never get married. He's currently married but his wife ties him down and claims half his assets that he earned himself. He says women will marry just for this reason. His best friend committed suicide cuz his ex wife rolled him for all he had.