I'm a HS sophomore and feel like I have nothing to look forward to in life

Appreciate the reply, I'll give that a go.

Thanks, I'll definitely look into that.

Thanks bro

Thanks for your input! My HS is super small and my teammates right now are either not motivated or sprinters/jumpers, so maybe that's why it's harder for me to vibe with my teammates much. Hopefully my college experience is similar to what you exerienced.

who gives a crap about teenage popularity. part of it is money. once everyone starts heading off to college and jobs, who has "money" resets. i make more money than the brats who teased me for being poor. focusing on who has money "now" is a snapshot of a parental lottery that reduces in significance once you hit 18.

who gives a crap about teenage popularity. part of it is utterly conventional appeal. how much you drink, how fun you are at parties, are you on the football team. most of those kids will never play a sport again after graduation. some will turn into alcoholics. and fwiw partying democratizes in college. in adulthood, to me, i am more interested in unique people. develop your uniqueness.

last point but some of this is healthy pride. i was on a 2 time state champion select soccer team. the weird thing is next to no one on campus knew a thing. when they woke up was when i got individual honors for the school, or the school soccer team progressed towards state. i personally learned to take some pride in what i had done, in and of itself, without worrying if others cared or knew. the select soccer success then carried me into college soccer. so the thing i had been quietly doing on my own became a vehicle into college and college sports.

work on your own interestingness. be diversely successful in many things. and play the long game.

shut up about browbeating people on effort. lead by example. when someone asks how you succeed, point to the work.

if you want to be a leader you need to learn to reach people where they live. some folks may not want to hear your work ethic lecture. but they might be open to hearing how they could do big things this year, or to nudging them that we need to put in the work to beat the rival school down the street. the game is to figure out what motivates people and not be That Person who hands out self-serving pro-authority lectures.

If you have some things you enjoy, try to do them regularly. If you don't, try to find some. Try to find others who enjoy the same things and connect with those people. Life isn't a competition of who has the most friends or dates the most girls. Let things evolve organically. Don't force friendships or dating; let them come organically. There is a lot out there to experience, and you are just at the beginning.

You sound like me in high school. People will tell you that it's perfectly normal to feel that way in high school but let's face it - there are others in your school that are popular, confident and seemingly at-ease with life. That difference is hard to cope with/understand when you're young.

You'll see that , later in life, those differences are just part of life. Being quiet, introverted or shy is perfectly normal for many, many people and everyone understands that (when they "grow up"). You're going to meet a lot of friends and maybe a spouse that loves the way you are.

When I meet my old high school classmates - I'm in my 60's now - they treat me with respect and like old friends, even though I didn't feel that connection in high school.

You should look up articles on the Four Temperaments. I's fascinating how you can see the descriptions apply to you and those in your life.

re a girlfriend, work on becoming a person with a bunch of diverse interests and varied successes. don't just be a running drudge. you will meet people with the same major or career. my wife works in my field. if you are into making art or music or outdoors or you name it, in your 20s you might meet someone who shares those interests. do work on being a better athlete, but you can only do that so much a day. ditto homework. when you have some free time, work on some hobbies or interests. that becomes a way to meet like people.

i mean, the first chunk of meeting a girl is attraction, but if you bore her to death or have zero in common it's over in 5 minutes. once you escape HS you figure out the popular cheerleader you crushed on has nothing in common with you but maybe the cute artsy girl is a vibe.

And how could I forget...Please read George Sheehan's "Running and Being". As he describes himself he sounds just like us!

re the pecking order, that poster is right. thing is, the day you walk out of the HS that order ceases to exist. if you go to college, particularly far away, you sort in with a whole new set of people. your old station doesn't exist. the popular kids aren't there. if you stay home and get a job, you sort into a workplace and the adult life of your town. the kids weren't fans, well, maybe the coworkers and adults are.

and, fwiw, if you don't like where you fit in your town, late teens and 20s, before you rack up mortgages and car debts and other financial tethers, are a good time to start over someplace fresh. either for college or as an adult entering real life.

but anyhow, point being, second you leave graduation all that crap evaporates. you won't see a lot of them again. whether they liked you doesn't matter. you hit your mid 20s successful and the weird thing is popular people who gave you crap, but struggled in their own transition, start coming to you for advice. it all resets. other than a reunion, no one cares.

Having taught and coached sophomores for 10 years, I can tell you conclusively that everything you are thinking and feeling is completely normal. 99% of your peers are feeling basically the same. At that age, everyone is so focused on their own insecurities that they have no bandwidth to see the same things in others. So basically, don’t sweat it. Focus on things that make you happy: running, bands, clubs, hobbies, whatever. Find the things you’re passionate about and put your all into them. In doing so, you‘ll meet people who share your interests and you’ll start building your tribe. By your senior year, you’ll feel like a completely different human, I promise. Hang in there. Sophomore year is tough, but it’s almost over.

re loneliness, if you go to a serious school that gets strong students, major in something you are passionate about, and play a college sport, you will find your tribe. not everyone will be a genius but the nature of the beast is a good school will have other people like you, majors or clubs in your interest areas will have people with similar interests, and by the time you hit college sports a healthy percent of that level team will be talented and hard working or they don't get there. i was buddies with a bunch of the soccer players and runners. you will find your people.

You have no real problems, just wait til you're an actual adult. It gets much, much worse trust me

Dude- hang in there.

1) I think what you're describing is pretty common and the experience of a lot of high schoolers and especially distance runners. 14-18 is a tough time.

2) I was probably afraid of girls at your age which didn't help. Trust me you'll be able to get a girlfriend. I think at 16 what people want is very different than 26 or 36.

3) Be yourself. The quality of friends is better than the quantity of friends.

4) Try and not be so self critical. Be yourself. People will like you.

5) College is really fun or at least for me it was. And I still felt awkward in certain situations. It's part of life.

Good luck.

Fake post.

Have you talked to your parents about this? Do you have any siblings you could share this with?