Am I an idiot? Just broke up with my hot, fast (16:30 5k), cool, fun GF who loves me

Why are you going onto letsrun for serious life advice? Just because you both run, doesn't mean that these random other letsrun junkies know what is best for you and your current situation.

Advice: Think about what you really want and COMMUNICATE it with your closest and wisest friends who know you and your situation.

After reviewing the situation I've come to the conclusion that you are obviously a homosexual. You need to come to terms with it.

honestly, letsrun has become a dating forum..

No, you are not an idiot. You are gay.

Hey, I m in the same situation.

I am going through withdraw right now and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong. She's great and everything but I just feel something is missing... and now she keeps pushing me to get married.

Mitoman wrote:

Hey, I m in the same situation.

I am going through withdraw right now and trying to figure out what the hell is wrong. She's great and everything but I just feel something is missing... and now she keeps pushing me to get married.

do not marry her....if everything is not 1000% right, whatever you do, do not marry her!

So whatever happened with this? I'm terribly curious as to how it ended

So, did this guy ever get it figured out?

8/10

You got an amazing amount of serious responses, but you completely lost me when you said she was a hot distance runner. There are no such things.

I couldn't disagree more. There are some very attractive female distance runners.

I read through about just over half of these posts and this was never considered. I wasn't going to post but I honestly think my insight may help you see.

First off, I won't really spend time pointing out your outright arrogance and necessary need for attention. Because although it is more advanced than mine, as it has been already pointed out, we all have our own flaws. However, I will say this nature of who you are is part of the reason you find yourself where you are.

I feel that we may be similar in practice but are choosing to see the situation from two different perspectives. I am 21 years old, so a little younger than you, and growing up since highschool I can always remember having a semi-serious girlfriend. (meaning all my relationships last 1.5 years+) My first serious girlfriend was late freshman year of highschool and I remember the feelings that came with it. She was the first girl I experienced almost everything with. We spent a lot of time together, we lost our virginities, the whole kip and kaboodle. And at the time it all seemed so perfect. I remember thinking that my young naive eyes could never look any other way because she was all I needed. Obviously I was young and stupid but in all reality, this girlfriend I had very little in common with. But everything was new and I loved the attention and security that came with our relationship. Our eventual demise came about a year and half into the relationship over some trivial high school drama invloving partying and a random spur summer trip to Germany and although I broke up with her I remember regretting it a little while later when I saw her "get over" me.

Flash forward, a month or two I started dating this other girl who was perfect from an intellectual and relation standpoint. Granted she was very attractive to many guys but she wasn't necessarily my "physical type". She was not a skinny runner but she was busty and curvy. Anyways, long story short we dated for almost three years and broke up on and off through the first two years of college. I initiated the couple break ups but the eventual feeling of rejection is what brought me back each and every time. Throughout our relationship I always struggled with feelings for other girls that were "more my type" physically and even met a girl who was both but I was committed because there were a lot of things about my girlfriend that I really liked and I felt like an ass to let that be the reason. The bottom line is when we finally broke up for good, I remember thinking that all I needed "differently" was one of those girls that I was attracted to physically that would go along with it and I would be set.

Fast forward again, a couple months later I start dating a girl just how I self-proposed. She was fast, sexy as all hell, smart and nerdy at the same time, etc. It's all hugs and giggles the first few months, like they all are. But sure enough a few months down the road I start having doubts. Wasn't this the very thing I asked for? Why did I still have doubts? I still had doubts because of who I am/was as a person. Everyone has flaws no matter who they are and after a few months those become apparent. No matter who the girl is after a few months with anyone I would have doubts because I have an unfortunate ability to see the negative. The discontinuity in all my relationships was ME. That was the sole correlation. As soon as I began to realize that about myself the relationship could get better. We actually broke up for a small while ( a year or so down the road) and I had to come to terms with all of this and luckily since that is the kind of person she is, she wasn't bangin a bunch of dudes and was still there for me when I came to my senses. Now we are back together and dating and I am correct my arrogant selfish tendencies.

I would have eventually figured this out after dating woman upon woman for more than a month or two but it would have taken a larger sample size and a few years later to realize that I was the problem. By then it may have been too late. My choices probably bleaker. And I woulda passed up on some amazing women.

So I encourage you to realize that you may be an attractive dude (although you seem socially sub-par, no offense meant) and think that every woman is at your expense because you have this pseudo self-confidence (although in reality, its bleak but you put on a front) but eventually you are going to realize that you keep chasing this feeling of acceptance from women because it sounds like you have been rejected in the past. (The same reason you come on letsrun for advice) So you probably will end up going from woman to woman until you realize this and then they will not only be emotionally messed up and intellectually slow but also not up to your "high standards". So why not fix this now while the chick is banging and is fricken in love with you? What more can you ask for? You can't ask for anything more and this is coming from someone who is probably more attractive, charming, witty and faster than you :)

Hope this helps brotha and, although maybe blunt at time, everything is said in love. My suggestion would be if you want to be happy, to not even try and fight this but listen because its the truth and the truth sometimes hurts.

^wall o text

I love it when people respond and have not idea they're about a year late.

This is very much a true story. i was there when she heard about this post and read everyone of these comments.

And yes, she is hot. A genuinely very pretty girl. One of the hottest runners i have seen.

And no Run2B you are not an idiot. You did what you felt was right. Although hard at the time, it seems to have worked out just fine. Just don't race her anytime soon ;)

Run2b... wrote:

Alas, I let her get away. Now she's with a pro football player who's in the NFL.

Any woman who would be with a football player is a loser.

How you doing now?

Are you married yet, you're 31, hows life btw?

Run2b... wrote:

Not hung up on the EX. She is engaged and will be married in 2 months.

Her goal was to be married, regardless of who it was with.

That was not a good reason to be with her.

Being in a good relationship is much more important.