What should I say during the Turkey Trot before I DROP these fools?

Find out which one is cuffed and exclaim, "I smashed your girl."

Ever post on Letsrun?

I didn't pay the entry fee for this slow of a tempo.

As you make the power move to pass someone and drop them, turn to them and say "Hey, got a present for you". Then proceed to loudly crap your pants. Guarantee that will immediately clear up space to male your move for glory

I would guess you will struggle to beat the top Kenyan woman, so slow your roll Bob Dole. Pound your fist on the table, you know the drill.

"Did someone say 'pass the turkey?'"

“Enjoy your Cornish Hen!”

I’m thankful for you scrubs

I heard an news story today about local Turkey Trots and the one for Spokane is known as "Huffin' for the Stuffin'".

Another one in Arlington, WA is called "Run Your Buns Off"

"Your move." And then do the shhh as you cross the finish line

Only if you are quicker than sub14 otherwise you are one of the hobby joggers too

I need to wear an LRC singlet, then announce, “I Rich from CA” THEN DROP ‘EM.

Take your pick:

Race you back to the old age home.

See you ladies at the next weight watchers meeting.

Later wanna come to my mom’s house to watch cartoons?

Say nothing. Casually look back, then take off.

When you cross the line, slow the last few steps and cross the line with a serene but serious look on your face, stop your watch, look at it casually as if this is nothing. Then kindly thank the volunteers as you walk/jog away from the finish area.

Nothing, act like you’ve been there before. Of course you won’t be the that position, at best you will be middle of the pack but more likely you will be on the couch.