Sounds like neither one of them likes family life. He's depressed and she doesn't want to hang alone with her kids. What about play dates with other moms? Why can't he take them out for a few hours on weekend days?
Carolyn Hax and the husband who runs too much
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Had3kids<5YO wrote:
Sounds like neither one of them likes family life. He's depressed and she doesn't want to hang alone with her kids. What about play dates with other moms? Why can't he take them out for a few hours on weekend days?
No, it sounds like HE doesn't want family life.
Maybe he was depressed because of it. Maybe he realized that being a dad meant a lot less "me" time and a lot more responsibility and he wanted his freedom back.
Doing the morning routine and tons of weekend kid time all by yourself is exhausting regardless of how much you want that family life. The morning routine is the most unfair, and it doesn't sound like the wife is getting any time to recharge.
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Had3kids<5YO wrote:
Sounds like neither one of them likes family life. He's depressed and she doesn't want to hang alone with her kids. What about play dates with other moms? Why can't he take them out for a few hours on weekend days?
your kids are only small for a short time, too.
Neither one of them like their own children.
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The guys obviously just having an affair and she’s not very cluey. Even elite level marathoners are barely hitting 15 hours a week. This guy is just getting his dick sucked because frankly, the woman in that article sounds like a shrew
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In the Bushes. wrote:
He's having an affair.
Or just going to the bar.
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Playing on away grounds wrote:
The guys obviously just having an affair and she’s not very cluey. Even elite level marathoners are barely hitting 15 hours a week. This guy is just getting his dick sucked because frankly, the woman in that article sounds like a shrew
Or he could be a Larry Craig going out and sucking the D on the DL
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rojo wrote:
I subscribe to the Post so here is a link everyone can read (I"ve also changed out the original link) as you can share 10 articles per month:
I thought Hax's comment about injury was stupid. Other than that, isn't this easy? If he gets 15 hours of alone time, shouldn't she get the same?
Careful rojo....a post subscription might cost you your street cred with the ultra right on this website. Channel your inner Tucker Carlson.
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commute time? wrote:
If he lives in WA maybe he's running at parks, so perhaps the wife is factoring in commute time? Idk.
I.e. drive 30 mins, run for 1 hour, drive 30 mins back.
15 hours/week seems extreme for a new runner.
Running to work could save a lot of time. If it take 30 minutes to drive into work but only an hour do run there, you hour long run takes 30 minutes. Of course, you have to figure out how to get home.
I've been readin ghax for 25 years. I always wonder if the letter writers and hax purposely don't include things. The article doesn't say anything about whether he's picking up the slack at night.
It seems like the easy solution would be - one parent does wakup routine, one does the bed time routine.
In general kids go to bed prety early and wake up fairly late. So the other alternative would be for dad to run before they are up or after they are asleep - do at least half of his running then so.
For example, it would be easy to wake up at 6 and do 6 miles before the kids get up at 7. You also could easily bang out 10 miles after they go to bed at 8. Well I probably shouldn't use the word easy. It's not easy to train at a high level and work and have a family.
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In the Bushes. wrote:
He's having an affair.
If this is not the post of the week, I don't know why I would even listen to the letsrun podcast
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malarko wrote:
Kvothe wrote:
This was a good response until this inaccurate pseudoscience was thrown in. I worry that whoever receives the advice would focus in on this falsehood rather than the real message. Trying to show a sense of concern here is also insincere. Both partners in a marriage need me time and they'll have to figure out a way for both to have it for a healthy relationship. This is why people who run are so often wealthy or middle class - they can afford to have someone else watch the kids.
Agreed. I remember my son went to a doctor for an illness and noted that he was running about 50 miles per week, and the doctor referred to that as "extreme." My son chose not to mention that this was the first cycle of base building for summer and he'd be up above 100 mpw in-season, he thought it would blow the doc's mind. People who don't or at least haven't run shouldn't dispense running advice, but then I suspect we're all guilty of going beyond our expertise when it comes to areas we don't know well. It's kind of like how all of us here can spot the subtle or not-so-subtle flaws in a running movie but a non-runner wouldn't, but might spot flaws in another movie about whatever they know well.
I have had MANY doctors tell me 30-40mpw was too much. They’re all overweight too.
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rojo wrote:
I subscribe to the Post so here is a link everyone can read (I"ve also changed out the original link) as you can share 10 articles per month:
I thought Hax's comment about injury was stupid. Other than that, isn't this easy? If he gets 15 hours of alone time, shouldn't she get the same?
Ugh, c'mon Rojo. Why would you even admit to subscribing to that sensationalist journalism?!
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Dumdumssssss wrote:
malarko wrote:
Agreed. I remember my son went to a doctor for an illness and noted that he was running about 50 miles per week, and the doctor referred to that as "extreme." My son chose not to mention that this was the first cycle of base building for summer and he'd be up above 100 mpw in-season, he thought it would blow the doc's mind. People who don't or at least haven't run shouldn't dispense running advice, but then I suspect we're all guilty of going beyond our expertise when it comes to areas we don't know well. It's kind of like how all of us here can spot the subtle or not-so-subtle flaws in a running movie but a non-runner wouldn't, but might spot flaws in another movie about whatever they know well.
I have had MANY doctors tell me 30-40mpw was too much. They’re all overweight too.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, get a primary Dr. that runs.
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