Theres this lonley guy on my xc team, should i talk to him ! i want to friend him but im scared he will think I want him

It’s human nature to want someone that shows you affection, especially when single and raging with hormones. Why does it scare you that a guy friend might like-like you? That is usually how the world typically functions until you grow up and are weighed down by conjugal obligations and waning desire for carnal fulfillment as you hurtle towards senescence and eventually mortality.

There's nothing wrong with befriending someone. Just be careful not to lead him on. If he starts to expect more, there are ways to make it clear you're only after friendship.

i think the better approach is do it as a group. with the team, a chunk of it, or a few friends. want to sit with "us?" want to run with "us?" "we" think you could use a friend. maybe get the nicer guys involved. gets at same issue, better chance of a natural friendship, less about you in particular. to me you're better off bringing him a group with some genuine "friends" (plural) as opposed to "pity."

what could be misunderstood, XC girl and i, would sit together many meet bus trips, got along well, joke, tease, she has a pet name and song for me, she and dad cheer for me at XC and TF meets, visit her locker almost daily and walk her to class, introduced to her dad, dads knew each other, finally second XC season says, "ask me out and i'd say yes." wanna go to the movies, yes. hears through the runner grapevine i am all excited, "oh, but i meant as friends. maybe i'd grow into it, though." she kept trying to revive the friendship after, stop me in the hall and want to catch up, but i checked out. was a shame, it was fun. some mix of that would be where the guy will think you're interested.

I've been a ghost for almost 5 years now. It sucks. Try befriending him, but maybe include 1-2 of your friends in any hangout if you want to minimize romantic connotations.

Once when I was in a friend group of young adults one of the women saw a guy sitting by himself. She had ME go ask him to join us because she didn't want to give him the wrong impression. Something like that might work.

re the guy saying he feels like a ghost, seek out people with common interests. also maybe explore several new interests/hobbies, perhaps even in a social setting as opposed to at home.

to me serious athletes, multi-sport people, you spend every day of the week, or almost every, practices, meets, games, for me most of the year at the time. you spend a lot of your time with teammates or at best the girl's team in that sport. you aren't quite olympic gymnasts or figure skaters, but you can get kind of closed off and a little too used to certain company. people can also stereotype that jocks are dumb or macho. to me it helps to round yourself out and seek out social situations that aren't a game or meet.

Perhaps English is not her first language. Give it a rest man!

I don't appreciate you making a thread about me as you are a sophomore and should know better as now I am going to tell the coach

And he falls in made love with you.

I can chose who i fall in love with as i have my own thoughts and feeligns

As if any 16 year old girl on planet earth would come here for relationship advice 🙄 Come on people

Junior girl did something similar my freshman year. Fell for her hard and we dated for 3 years until ended up running at different schools and just grew up a little on our own. Unless you see potential ask in a group and don’t always be the one doing the asking loll

Honestly she fits in here perfectly.

English is not my 1st language, and I had zero issues with comprehending that. Maybe you don't have typoglycemia or need proper grammar to understand things? Do you text your friends with proper grammar all the time?

I do text with proper grammer all the time. It's a pet peeve of mine.

Grammer is Kelsey's last name. Grammar is what you just properly misspelled.

Invite him to do stuff that always involves other people and being in public. Don't do things with just you two alone. If he tries to invite you to do something with just you two alone, just make up excuses for why you can't go or just say you can't make it. And if it seems like he is interested and you don't want it, just gradually disappear. That's kind of how it works in adult life. Letting somebody down without saying it.

It was riddled with typos and run on sentences.