As a former Naval Academy midshipman, here is my 2 cents:
I had always wanted to go to the Academy, and hearing that Coach Cantello “had a spot for me on the team” as a walk-on, was the icing on the cake. It was, however, a promise he failed to keep.
Within the first week of Plebe Summer, Coach Cantello told us that there was nothing guaranteed and that we would have to prove ourselves for a spot on the team/roster.
Mind you I was fast enough to walk on but slow enough to truly have no business being on a D1 team.
This was a hard pill to swallow. Plebe Summer is the basic training for the Naval Academy, so yeah, it sucks. I had looked at the distance running team as a place to get away and chase some of my personal goals. To find out that it was not the way it was “sold” to me beforehand caused a near crisis of me questioning if I even wanted to stay.
I did stay. I did my best to keep up on the team, but let’s be honest, I was slow. I got “cut” at the start of indoor track season. “Cantello doesn’t cut anyone, you cut yourself” is the word on the street. His official words were “clear out your locker” so yeah, I can see the ambiguity in that. I was told by teammates that I could come back, but I doubted myself.
I did my best to continue running. I amped my mileage and training up hoping that I could come back when I felt “ready” to rejoin the team.
In that time I developed an eating disorder and discovered I had a mild heart condition. I literally went out for one of my runs one day and made it halfway through and just walked back the the Yard defeated. I stopped running the next day and have not trained seriously since. It was that abrupt of a burnout.
My own demons surfaced around that time and I struggled with the reasons for why I was at the Academy in the first place. I developed some severe mental illness as well that plagued me for YEARS after I left the Academy.
I ended up leaving right at the start of Youngster (sophomore) year.
I will say that Coach Cantello’s “promise” to me of a spot on the team was misleading and partially to blame for some of the challenges I dealt with, but now, decade and a half later, I don’t hold any ill will or feelings toward him. In fact, I’m thankful for what I’ve been through. I’ve taken ownership of the road that I had to walk being a failed midshipman and a person struggling with severe mental health issues. That ownership has made me stronger.
I had my own demons that I have faced since I left. It’s been a really challenging road, but I’ve done it. I’m in an amazing place in life, happier than I’ve ever been.
I do think the environment Coach Cantello created was toxic, yes. I also think that’s a big shame, because there are a number of individuals I can think of who would have been great runners if his coaching was different.
I will say, though, that the season I spent running with the XC team has some really special memories for me. I had no business being on a D1 team. I am thankful for the opportunity to even have been given the chance.
In the past, the Academy has held a lot of painful memories and disappointment. Feelings of failure.
I am now able to find the nuance in all of it. I live close to the Academy now, I visit from time to time. Thankful for the good and the bad. Finding some peace after everything.
🤷♂️. That’s all we can do right?