My wife is going to become Stay At Home Mom

Many years ago when we were going to have kids, my wife did not want to work full-time in order to spend more time with them. We did the math and figured that what she made, we would spend it on day care and have to deal with those issues. Thus she became a stay home Mom while the kids were pre-school. There were some 'tight' times, but worth it.

One thing she will need is adult interaction. That could be with other Mom's or some type of activity for her away from the kids.

At age 2, kids should start doing some Montessori or half day preschool. It makes the transition to pre-3 much easier. Definitely get your kid into some early childhood program. Being at home all day with a 2 year old is a lot.

In most neighborhoods, there are lots of different mommy groups and playground meet ups for toddlers who are not yet in pre-k. My son is still friends with a couple of kids he met when he was in a neighborhood play group and my wife is friends with the mommies. In fact, I think my wife made more friends as a mommy than she has at any other time in her life.

Finally, there are probably lots of toddler time activities around wherever you live. Libraries almost always have story time. Museums, zoos, etc. often have special free stuff for toddlers during the day. And even programs that are not free are usually cheap for toddlers.

Gonna be a cluster..

Been married several time , the stay at home mom role is best suited for an artist person. Someone that relished little things, clings to small gestures and feels deeply.

If your spouse is just burned out, id recommend letting her take some time off with a plan for getting back into the workforce with a renewed sense of purpose, whatever that is. New role, new employer,career change , whatever that is.

Career women like this are not suited for Mommy like. She will try to be the alpha mom and your life will turn to sh*t.

brnAct21_7 wrote:

Gonna be a cluster..

Been married several time , the stay at home mom role is best suited for an artist person. Someone that relished little things, clings to small gestures and feels deeply.

If your spouse is just burned out, id recommend letting her take some time off with a plan for getting back into the workforce with a renewed sense of purpose, whatever that is. New role, new employer,career change , whatever that is.

Career women like this are not suited for Mommy like. She will try to be the alpha mom and your life will turn to sh*t.

Define “several times”.

You should not marry a woman who is not going to be a stay at home mom.

I make a very good salary and my wife wanted to stay home with the kids. We agreed that she’d do that.

It’s very hard work. No lie. Kids are an around the clock job in the early years, so I’m glad it was her, not me. But my kids (now 13 and 15) have turned out to be great kids. So I don’t regret the decision and neither does she. I realize it’s not the only way to raise great kids

Like someone said above, make sure she’s plugged into lots of social circles, mom groups, etc. It can get very lonely is your only conversation is “goo goo ga ga” 24 hours per day.

Also, when you’re off, offer to watch the kid(s) often so she can have a break. Also, make sure you leave the kid with a dependable babysitter regularly, so you and her can keep your pre-kids relationship strong. That part isn’t easy and requires a dedicated commitment. Your lives will be dominated by all things kids, but you can’t let your relationship be 100% about the kids. Dedicate time for just you two.

Leave the option open for her to go back to work, part- or full-time, if and when she decides she wants to.

StayAtHome wrote:

My wife is a PA----spent a lot of time and effort in school. She loves her job but feels like she'd be happier at home with our almost 2 year old. Im not sure more kids are in the future for us unfortunately.

Right now we have a full time nanny and our son likes her a lot.

Any advice for her from stay at home moms?

Really? One kid?

Keep her working until she at least pops out two more. The numbers don't add up otherwise.

You're welcome.

Since the equal rights movement, women have generally been expected to pull some weight with regards to contributing to helping the family and accruing a wage. This is only fair. A modern wome who doesn't want to work is a liability to the family and her husband. Do better. Both of you.

StayAtHome wrote:

My wife is a PA----spent a lot of time and effort in school. She loves her job but feels like she'd be happier at home with our almost 2 year old. Im not sure more kids are in the future for us unfortunately.

Right now we have a full time nanny and our son likes her a lot.

Any advice for her from stay at home moms?

Would make your wife go back to work and pay the sketchy nanny to raise your soul less child.

LRC: "Don't marry a woman who isn't planning to be a full time stay at home mom"

Also LRC: "Don't let a woman get away with not working lest she be a financial leech"

Typical. Boys, your sexism is showing.

two faced wrote:

LRC: "Don't marry a woman who isn't planning to be a full time stay at home mom"

Also LRC: "Don't let a woman get away with not working lest she be a financial leech"

Typical. Boys, your sexism is showing.

Simp.

two faced wrote:

LRC: "Don't marry a woman who isn't planning to be a full time stay at home mom"

Also LRC: "Don't let a woman get away with not working lest she be a financial leech"

Typical. Boys, your sexism is showing.

Maybe if you stopped pulling the victim card you would actually command respect. Somwone who constantly is playing the victim simply can not command ample respect, man or a woman. I have the utmost respect for women whove earned respect. If someone is not deserving of respect, they won't get it. Pulling the victim card at all crossroads ironically does not help.

If someone mentioned this I missed it.

I found the following tough to adapt to: I worked all day, came home mentally tired, and physically at times, Relaxing, going for a run, or just chilling with my wife and kids sounded perfect. However, many days my wife had been trapped inside the house for lack of a better way to put it, many and wanted to "go do something." I did because I understood and also wanted to be a good husband and father, but it could be a real drag sometimes. The perceptions of what "relaxing' was really changed when we were coming from different realms of working.

This might be something you want to discuss prior to it becoming an issue.

two faced wrote:

LRC: "Don't marry a woman who isn't planning to be a full time stay at home mom"

Also LRC: "Don't let a woman get away with not working lest she be a financial leech"

Typical. Boys, your sexism is showing.

I said the economics work if there are at least 3 kids involved. She will not replace the value of her income by staying home with one kid.

TLDR:

Stay-at-home mom with 1 kid: leech.

Stay-at-home mom with 3 kids: not bad but could use improvement.

Stay-at-home mom with 7+ kids: goddess.

My wife and I both work. We pay big $ to a nanny.

Man, I don’t think anybody could have a clue how difficult the stay at home parent life is until they had kids.

I’d rather dig ditches than stay at home all day with the kids! 😂

But seriously, it’s not the easy road. Men and women both struggle in this role.

She will need freedom to leave the house at anytime when you’re not at work. She’s a prisoner of your home if she doesn’t gtfo fairly often.

So it would make it rough. You’ve worked your tiny penis off all damn day and are tired AF.

You get home and you’ve probably got dad duties until they go to bed just because wifey can’t take it anymore!

Im being blunt and possible a bit dramatic but you get my point.

If she stays home just understand that her job is at least as hard as yours. I think the working parent often likes to think the stay at home one is on easy street.

That said, only one kid isn’t bad. Add another and goodnight sweet pea.

Hahhahhahahahahhahahahaaa!!!

Oh man you suck! Hahahahahaha!!

Not only will your wife get fatter with all the access to food, you’re both gonna be miserable. Tell her to stop being a lazy a$$ and earn some $$$. She’ll be spending all your money on useless crap and soon you’ll be resentful of her spending your $$, her daily “naps” to recharge, and her turning into a giant beanbag. Oh man you better put your foot down. Kids suck also. They will suck the soul out of you. And there goes any quiet time to yourself. You are digging your own grave, dork face. Go find a younger woman that likes to earn her keep. Stay at home mom is NOT real work.