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Count yourself lucky if she got the VAX and you didn't. The mRNA factory cells that cause heart damage can jump over to you when you're in close contact. If this is the case man, you dodged a bullet.
Most relationships end in a breakup, not marriage forever. This scenario sounds hard but not very hard.
It is not like:
- She got together with someone you know
- You have kids together
- You have property together
Blip. Doesn't feel like it when you're in it, but this is a blip.
Maybe so. Unrelated, but my mind goes back to this conversation Riker had with an opponent in Star trek who was trying to get under his skin by saying he'd been getting close with Deanna. Riker said something along the lines of "that's fine, if you can bring happiness to deanna's life then it makes me happy as well" and walked away. It made me think, I suppose if you really love someone, you should be happy for them finding someone who makes them truly happy and the best version of themselves- even if it isn't you. Take solace in the fact that they are happy, at least.
either unfollow or mute her on all social media. We're so much more attached to people now because of it, and it stops us from focusing on our own lives and the things that make it good. Remember social media was not a norm, and we weren't enveloped with people from our past this much as we are now. Also, social media only shows the highlight reel.
You and your ex broke up for a reason. Remember what that was and why it's better in the long run.
Take actions that are positive. The "be kind to yourself!" "do something good for you!" thing is way overplayed, but it really does help. go for a run or a bike ride to clear your head, spend time with friends and family to brighten your spirits, listen to good music, meditate, have a beer but don't drown yourself in alcohol.
Set a goal for yourself that you can control and are excited about and map out steps to achieve it. Be it a marathon, triathlon, a career step, writing a book, who knows just do it.
You read my mind, as was looking to type something similar to this. Don't 'shadow follow' her in any way, shape or form on social media. That includes her good friends and family.....out of sight is out of mind.
Definitely go our for a walk, run, ride or whatever. Also, you can find some quick ways to show some self worth......if you're in the midwest go shovel someone's walkway (elderly folks around you?). Or go sling some food at shelter, put up a note in your building to gather old coats.
I mean to post on this thread a couple weeks ago but then I got sick for nearly 2 weeks.
Sorry you're struggling man but it can be a natural reaction. If you need help feel free to reach out wejo@letsrun.com.
Also if you want a free letsrun shirt I'll send you one. This thread shows some of the best of letsrun and why I think we need anonymity on forums. We're a community of runners but we need to talk about things more important than running. Something like this I can see why you might not want to post under a registered name.
Not the exact same story as yours but when I got divorced it was really hard on me. I struggled and there was definitely a part of me that hoped we'd get back together, especially since that was kind of the history of our relationship. Thankfully, at some point that went away, and I have a wonderful wife and a kid and another on the way. But that doesn't diminish the struggle in between. But I think the struggle is the part of what life is about and being human. Smartest gut I know once told me, if you hit blackjack every time life would be pretty boring.
My advice, stay active, do things, and realize it's natural to feel a little or lot of pain now.
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