Loving your child is greater than anything you have ever done. You naturally love your child so much you would rather be hurt yourself than see them be seriously hurt.
Then they become teenagers. Gets kinda rough then, but it will pass.
this is categorically false. Many people beat their kids, have kids with their kids, mentally abuse their kids and worse. Stop projecting your weak fantasy onto a category that doesnt exist. Most dads and moms nowadays are pretty terrible people and atheists.
My good friend in highschool - his dad left his mom and hooked up with his girlfriend. He literally left his family and stole his sons girlfriend. Lol how is that love?
Statistically you're most likely to be MURDERED BY YOUR OWN FAMILY MEMBERS.
So either love is real but also love means murder and evil. Or the love you imagine doesnt exist. My logic is sound. How can lvoe be associated with family when your most likely to also be tortured and killed by them. Strangers are much less dangerous than your own parents. And even if they arnt killing you, they can still take your girlfriends or boyfriends or worse
Dude. I’m honestly concerned for you. If you go to any family event, such as a play museum, or a trampoline park, or a summer fair, 99% of families love and protect their kids. Or if you go to a restaurant or Starbucks, parents are taking care of their kids. The behavior you mentioned is not the majority of parents.
Yes. Pretty much act like 30 year olds for the rest of their lives. That really wasn't a terrible point in my life.
Some people are really good at forming strong relationships with people, and maybe don't need to have a brood to fulfill a void. It's a different path in life. But I don't see a problem with it. Definitely better than the 50%+ group of parents who aren't actually that good at it.
One thing the anti-kid crowd seems to forget is the concept of ancestral sacrifice.
You have 2 parents who sacrificed something in their lives to have you. Even if you had bad parents, they still sacrificed something to have you. Good parents sacrifice even more.
their parents, your grandparents probably sacrificed even more when conditions were tougher.
and here you are, you’re too cool to have kids. You just want to have freedom. you want all the benefits of other people sacrificing for you but you don’t want to sacrifice for someone else, i.e a child of your own. Kinda like a volunteer soccer coach, when you were little, they sacrificed their time so that you could have the benefit of a playful soccer experience. Now that you are metaphorically the age when you should be the volunteer soccer coach, and pay it forward, you choose to not help others and instead indulge in your own life.
the anti kid crowd is take take take. Not take and give.
All I’m saying is, someone sacrificed their life, their energy, their time, their money for you. Your parents and grandparents sacrificed all of those things so that you could be alive. It’s easy to receive the benefits and it’s hard to provide them.
someone had to put up with your pooped pants, your hours and hours trying to ride a bike, to learn the piano, whatever else you did as a kid.
and the fact that you gloat about being consciously selfish later in life is wrong.
Do they just act like 30 year old kids for the rest of their lives? How do they achieve deep fulfillment? Do they usually regret it?
I'm in a couple, both of us in our late 30s, with no kids. Unsure if we ever will, and I can easily think of how we would "achieve deep fulfillment" -- since we already do.
If you are challenged to imagine deep fulfillment in the absence of reproducing, then... reproduce?
For some of us this doesn't feel necessary to our happiness, fulfillment, etc.
Yea I get it challenges are tough. My child wants to keep wearing his diaper and have someone change him. Yet I’m teaching him how to grow up and poop in a potty. I can see how you enjoy essentially pooping in a diaper the rest of your life and calling it freedom.
Curious to know your thought process here. Did you really think a child-free couple would read this and think, “damn he makes a great point, we should probably have kids”?
I would think if anyone read this and put any thought into it all, then they should definitely not have kids , or operate heavy machinery
Yes. Pretty much act like 30 year olds for the rest of their lives. That really wasn't a terrible point in my life.
Some people are really good at forming strong relationships with people, and maybe don't need to have a brood to fulfill a void. It's a different path in life. But I don't see a problem with it. Definitely better than the 50%+ group of parents who aren't actually that good at it.
One thing the anti-kid crowd seems to forget is the concept of ancestral sacrifice.
You have 2 parents who sacrificed something in their lives to have you. Even if you had bad parents, they still sacrificed something to have you. Good parents sacrifice even more.
their parents, your grandparents probably sacrificed even more when conditions were tougher.
and here you are, you’re too cool to have kids. You just want to have freedom. you want all the benefits of other people sacrificing for you but you don’t want to sacrifice for someone else, i.e a child of your own. Kinda like a volunteer soccer coach, when you were little, they sacrificed their time so that you could have the benefit of a playful soccer experience. Now that you are metaphorically the age when you should be the volunteer soccer coach, and pay it forward, you choose to not help others and instead indulge in your own life.
the anti kid crowd is take take take. Not take and give.
All I’m saying is, someone sacrificed their life, their energy, their time, their money for you. Your parents and grandparents sacrificed all of those things so that you could be alive. It’s easy to receive the benefits and it’s hard to provide them.
someone had to put up with your pooped pants, your hours and hours trying to ride a bike, to learn the piano, whatever else you did as a kid.
and the fact that you gloat about being consciously selfish later in life is wrong.
Do they just act like 30 year old kids for the rest of their lives? How do they achieve deep fulfillment? Do they usually regret it?
no kids no partners. mid 40s. enjoying my life. i find fulfillment in experiences and friendships. ive never had any desire to pass my genes along. ive never had any desire to marry. disconnect yourself from the purely arbitrary things/rules adults do and live your own dang life.
I dunno, we commute to work 40-50 hour week jobs at rewarding jobs that do good for the community, run 40-50mpw with cross training then either race, volunteer or take a trip on the weekend and maybe see some family or friends. Who has time for kids? I'm plenty happy and don't care about adding to the population of the earth.
and here you are, you’re too cool to have kids. You just want to have freedom. you want all the benefits of other people sacrificing for you but you don’t want to sacrifice for someone else, i.e a child of your own. Kinda like a volunteer soccer coach, when you were little, they sacrificed their time so that you could have the benefit of a playful soccer experience. Now that you are metaphorically the age when you should be the volunteer soccer coach, and pay it forward, you choose to not help others and instead indulge in your own life.
the anti kid crowd is take take take. Not take and give.
All I’m saying is, someone sacrificed their life, their energy, their time, their money for you. Your parents and grandparents sacrificed all of those things so that you could be alive. It’s easy to receive the benefits and it’s hard to provide them.
someone had to put up with your pooped pants, your hours and hours trying to ride a bike, to learn the piano, whatever else you did as a kid.
and the fact that you gloat about being consciously selfish later in life is wrong.
You see, that's exactly it.
I have no kids yes (maybe I will in the future, maybe I won't), but I don't buy the idea that it is some great sacrifice or contribution to the world to reproduce and then raise your own offspring. I see people getting a lot of joy from this, but the fact that you are all saying how joyous it is reflects that it is not some altruistic decision. You are taking the easy road, doing what you have been told to you whole life.
The world is not going to suffer from a lack of on it anytime soon. More like the opposite. If you make more humans, yes, it is your responsibility to raise them and I applaud your work to do so.
But I would bet that I bring more benefit to the world than most parents, and I don't think that will go up just because I generate offspring some day.
1) If "being able to spend more quality time with the person I liked enough to marry is pretty nice" wouldn't being able to spend time with a creature you CREATED be even better?
2) You do realize that you are now in the process of failing to do what every single one of your ancestors was able to do even without technology - procreate. You are defying biology.
3) What will your legacy be? None.
4) When you are old and you or your wife is dead, who will come see you at the nursing home?
This is a great post. Surprised it has 3-10 up-down votes
1) If "being able to spend more quality time with the person I liked enough to marry is pretty nice" wouldn't being able to spend time with a creature you CREATED be even better?
2) You do realize that you are now in the process of failing to do what every single one of your ancestors was able to do even without technology - procreate. You are defying biology.
3) What will your legacy be? None.
4) When you are old and you or your wife is dead, who will come see you at the nursing home?
This is a great post. Surprised it has 3-10 up-down votes
Actually, it's a terrible post, which is probably why it is so down-voted.
Quick answers:
We get it. You are selfish.
A few things to consider. 1) If "being able to spend more quality time with the person I liked enough to marry is pretty nice" wouldn't being able to spend time with a creature you CREATED be even better?
Why would you assume that? My wife is someone I had years to choose when we were both fully-formed adults. Some people find babies and kids interesting (though usually just their own). Not everyone. 2) You do realize that you are now in the process of failing to do what every single one of your ancestors was able to do even without technology - procreate. You are defying biology.
Very bad point here. It is "defying biology" to have a life expectancy of over 80 years, too -- should we avoid that. Just because prehistoric infant mortality was high doesn't mean we need to reproduce like simians who are going to see 1 in 5 of their offspring die.
3) What will your legacy be? None.
Only someone whose own life is truly meaningless to them would say this. Sad. There are so many legacies possible other than being one of the billions of humans out there generating more humans.
4) When you are old and you or your wife is dead, who will come see you at the nursing home?
The idea that we should make life-altering decisions, with decades of effects, based on two years of demented visits in the nursing home (the average duration in a home before death), is absurd.
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beta op triggered by other people having independent thought lol
Do they just act like 30 year old kids for the rest of their lives? How do they achieve deep fulfillment? Do they usually regret it?
They go around hating kids they encounter in public for daring to exist in their presence, while also acting delusionally superior to those who choose to have kids. Then perhaps one of them gets snipped, but they get a false sense of security and end up with an oops baby.